[ SECRET POST #3994 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3994 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 49 secrets from Secret Submission Post #572.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Venting

[(Anonymous)]

Call him on it. Let him know that you get he wants to play happy families, but pretending that she's not physically violent and dangerous won't change reality. Try not to JADE:


http://outofthefog.website/what-not-to-do-1/2015/12/3/jade-dont-justify-argue-defend-explain

Because remember, this is not a negotiation. Make it very clear that if he tries to spring her as a surprise, you'll leave and there'll be consequences for him if he betrays your trust like that. Stress that he cannot magically fix your relationship with your sister, he can only damage his relationship with you. If you decide to chance it and go, make sure you have an escape plan that doesn't rely on your dad or other family members who might think that "trapping" you on the trip is a good solution.

Re: Venting

[(Anonymous)]

Nice update, he's claiming he mistyped, which is his way of saying 'you're right, but I don't want to admit I'm wrong' so... I'll take it.

And he knows damn well if he surprises me with her I'll walk out and always make sure it's an option. Another well-meaning relative years ago decided I was being 'difficult' about things and lied about her being invited to a family get-together so I'd show up. I showed up, saw she was there, went 'so sorry I can't stay' and walked out. It was a huge blow-up. Lots of tearful phone calls about how could I be so rude! I stuck to my guns and refused to apologize. Since then I've been wary, but no one else has pulled any surprises.

Re: Venting

[(Anonymous)]

Replying to myself, I kind of want to add, I make that sound a lot more badass than it was. I spent a week or two after I noped out there crying and terrified of the fall out and wanting to give in and apologize under the pressure. It was one of the hardest things I ever did, but it made things so much easier in the long run.