fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3995 ]

[ SECRET POST #3995 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3995 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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02.

[Imagine Dragons]

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[Stranger Things]

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[Richard Hammond from Top Gear]

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[MCU Steve Rogers]

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[The Punisher]

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[Jennifer Lawrence]

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[Josh Brolin]

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[Left: Brian Molko of Placebo / Right: David Bowie]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 39 secrets from Secret Submission Post #572.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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Anyone read this viral short story? Thoughts?

Link if you haven't:
https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2017/12/11/cat-person

I haven't read it, and I'm not going to, but from what I gather on the Internet, it's about the existential horror of a woman going on a date and having sex with someone who's not attractive?

And being extremely bad at communication at the same time. But the guy is the "bad guy" in the end because he was bad at sex and then after she ghosted on him and told all her friends an exaggerated version of what happened so that she looked good, he texted "whore" at her. The end. Massive shrug.

I thought it was an interesting on bad communication, someone ignoring their intuition, and of a "nice guy" disguised as a nice guy.

Same. I thought the bad communication was masterfully portrayed - very realistic! - and I enjoyed all the ambiguities and the way neither character was very sympathetic. Just human with all the insecurities and neuroticisms that involves.

+100000

I'm actually desperate to talk to someone about this because I saw so many weird takes on twitter but I'm at work right now :(

Basically I thought it was a very normal short story and I it got at something very universal and underexamined. But people were reacting to it as nonfiction and I cannot imagine reading that and not realizing it wasn't an article, or getting upset because the protagonist was flawed. It's crazy to me that that's seems to be so common.

Yep, the reaction on social media has been predictably extreme, hahahaha.

Seemed like a standard piece of good short lit to me, too. It's such a commonplace scenario, but like you say, one not often explored in depth, and the author mined it for its cringeyness.

it got at something very universal and underexamined

This was my main takeaway from it as well, and is why I appreciated it. Reading it, I just kept thinking, jesus, I feel like I've heard a close variation on this exact experience from pretty much ever straight female friend I have. Hell, even I've had experiences that were reasonably similar to this, though I'm ace so it's not quite the same in my case.

Also, this story felt almost like a companion piece to an article I read a year or so ago:

https://www.thecut.com/2015/10/why-consensual-sex-can-still-be-bad.html

If you liked the story, then I recommend the article. If you didn't like the story, then you probably won't like the article either.

Loved that article, wasn't impressed by the story.

I love the story and think the article is bullshit.

That article is weird. It seems to be focusing on the fact a lot of feminism is focused on preventing rape rather than in making men more considerate lovers?

Which seems a bit like saying charities are too busy making sure the homeless have food and coats and someplace safe to stay instead of focusing on providing them tickets to Hamilton. It's very White Middle Class Feminism.

I've seen a lot of people calling it a "universal female experience" and saying stuff like "every woman can relate" and as a socially reserved lesbian who never really casually dated absolutely nothing in it is relatable to me and it's making me frustrated and like I must be missing something about it.

A more accurate and appropriate thing to say would be, "This is an immensely relatable experience for a huge number of straight women." I suspect that's basically what people mean when they say "every woman can relate." They're just being lazy and making unfortunate generalizations without thinking first.

If women being too dumb to communicate properly is an immensely relatable experience for a huge number of straight women, that's not a very flattering look at a huge number of straight women.

I've had similar experiences with men as well. The problem went away when I started dating almost exclusively women. Funny, that.

Maybe two people being too dumb to communicate properly cancel each other out.
But yeah, no, anecdotal evidence is really no evidence at all.

I thought the more relevant part was her age, rather than being a heterosexual in college. Just making bad decisions, not really understanding whats going on with people in a different place than life than her. I didn't find her relatable, but it did remind me of situations I got into in as a young woman.

NAYRT yeah the generalizing is a bit annoying, but I can understand what people mean by it. definitely felt real and for the mosy part, sadly relatable.

I don't have many thoughts outside of it's well written and both the people in the story suck? I mean it really speaks to the quality of the storytelling that I spent the whole time repeatedly shaking my head at how immensely unsympathetic I am of the narrator especially, but still enjoyed it overall.

I'm kind of side-eyeing the concept people are talking about up thread that this is a 'universal experience' for straight women. Like, utter incompetence at basic communication (things like "actually I'm only 20" before you get to the club?!!!) is universal? Continuing to go out with a guy you think is ugly and gross and a fucking wimp, and then sleeping with him even though you were disgusted just at kissing him, is universal? Breaking up over text and ghosting him because you're too fucking weak-ass shit to use your grown up words is universal? That's fucking pathetic.

I read New Yorker short fiction regularly, and nothing about this piece seems outside the norm for that crop. I'd even say that flawed, unlikable protagonists is a common theme for the stories they choose. This is the problem about things going viral, you get a lot of people who come into something without any context or previous experience and then they think a thing is something it really isn't.

Is it a step up from their usual sad boner confessional fare to run a story that's both sad boner and sad clit confessional?

A bunch of people are reading a piece of short fiction. This isn’t a problem; this is a cause for celebration.

On the one hand, I had a "Robert" after me when I was in college - older guy, not that attracted to him - but I awkwardly put him off until he got the hint and gave up before it got any further than him just trying to ask me out. I can't identify with the "I had sex with some guy I don't like" part, but I can identify with the not being able to straight up say "Sorry dude whose feelings I don't want to hurt, but I'm not into you" part and the trying to convince myself this is a more appealing possibility that it really is part. I also can't identify with the flirting over text first part, because I didn't have a cell phone back then.

Overall, this did not live up to the hype and my takeaway is that the protagonist is very young.

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[ SECRET POST #3995 ]

Cat Person By Kristen Roupenian

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