[ SECRET POST #4389 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4389 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 09 secrets from Secret Submission Post #628.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

01. https://i.imgur.com/j98kvlq.png

[(Anonymous)]

This is like...the start of a nerdy penthouse story.

[(Anonymous)]

Nooooooope. Nope, nope, nope.

[(Anonymous)]

What's to be freaked out by? Nothing wrong with liking traits in characters that you admire in others.

I know plenty of people who say they want a partner just like [a family member or friend they've known for ages and think is awesome], but the point is that person isn't the friend or family member because it's weird if it's actually them. That seems pretty common.

[(Anonymous)]

But that's not quite what OP is talking about. In their scenario, it's not just liking traits in characters that you also like in people IRL. It's about shipping a relationship - presumably, romantically - that's comparable and has a similar dynamic to the familiar relationship between OP and their father. That would definitely freak me out.

I know plenty of people who say they want a partner just like [a family member or friend they've known for ages and think is awesome],

TBH, I would actually be slightly weirded out by this as well, but to a much lesser extent than what OP described.

[(Anonymous)]

Not really? Considering the characters are not her and her dad. Plus OP says the characters are both men who are of similar ages, which changes the external dynamic already, even if they act in similar ways.

I mean, sure, replace me and my random IDK, uncle, with two people of compatible sexualities and ages and sure, maybe someone might perceive that as romantic. I might perceive that as romantic. But uh, we're not comparable sexualities and ages, so what does that have to do with anything?

[(Anonymous)]

It's not just that someone might perceive the relationship as romantic. It's that OP themselves notices the same dynamics and perceives them as romantic in one instance and familial in another.

And I'm... not sure if I can explain why it's weird. It just feels obviously weird to me, to have an OTP that's a romantic relationship and then notice that it has the same specific dynamics as your relationship with your father.

[(Anonymous)]

Ehhh, not to me. Just the fact that familial roles exist - and are recognized - already make them not exactly the same. A mother who makes a lunch every day for her daughter is already different from a woman who makes lunch every day for her girlfriend. Even if they say exactly the same things, look at the other person lovingly, and kiss them on the cheek before they leave the house.

[(Anonymous)]

But... according to OP's story, it's not just similar familial roles. It's the specific dynamics of their relationship. The way they talk and their opinions and the way they interact.

[(Anonymous)]

I think I don't understand how they can be exactly the same when one group acknowledges and respects a father-daughter relationship, and the other group is two unrelated men.

And if they aren't exactly the same, what's the problem?

[ninety6tears]

Yeah. There are a lot of "oh no, I married someone just like my parent" jokes but it's not a negative phenomenon if we're unconsciously modeling after positive relationships.

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah I mean, if the parent is a great role model and an awesome person, are you supposed to avoid awesome people with traits you like, just because they're too similar to your parents in behavior and views?

Some people are bothered by that, but it's also fine to not be bothered by that.

[(Anonymous)]

It's not just "CharA is like my dad"

It's "CharA is like my dad and CharB is like me"

[ninety6tears]

So? Being like one of your parents is often part of the joke.

[(Anonymous)]

MTE.

"So?" was literally my exact reaction as well. Like, literally, so? How does that make any difference whatsoever?

+1

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, this is it!

Re: +1

[(Anonymous)]

Profound.

[(Anonymous)]

"I married someone like my parent" usually implies the "and CharB is like me" part, considering CharB is literally "me" in that case.

[(Anonymous)]

I would kill for any hints to the pairing, I know it doesn’t matter but I’m so curious

[tabaqui]

Don't be freaked out, Anon. So long as you're not actually wanting a sexual or romantic relationship with your dad, you're fine. You see traits you like/are familiar with and that feels comfortable, and you identify with them: it's what we all do in fandom, to an extent.

You're not a weirdo or secretly contemplating incest, you're fine.

[(Anonymous)]

This, this, this.

My father is my best friend and all around favorite person. We're very close. I can't say I've had any OTPs whose dynamic reminded me overwhelmingly of our dynamic, but I definitely see similarities and resonances sometimes, and that makes sense to me.

I love my dad as a person, so why wouldn't some of his traits be appealing in others? And our relationship makes me feel very loved and understood and heard, so why wouldn't I want a similar dynamic (albeit a non-platonic version) in my OTP?

[tabaqui]

Exactly!

[(Anonymous)]

OK, this is how it would freak me out. When I ship two characters I tend to self-insert in my mind as one of them. So in this scenario I'd be imagining myself with the fictional "dad" figure but my screwy brain would put my real dad there because I'm so aware of the similarities and then just yuck!

[rosehiptea]

Many years ago I showed a story I wrote to a therapist and she asked who the main character reminded me of and I said "Me, I guess," and who the love interest reminded me of and I said "My dad." Then I said "Wait, that sounds bad..." Fortunately the therapist didn't make a thing of it. Also on further reflection I realized that the main character didn't remind me of me, the love interest did. So maybe I just wanted to be like my dad.

[(Anonymous)]

your friend should have really kept that thought to themselves tbh