fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #4399 ]

[ SECRET POST #4399 ]

⌈ Secret Post #4399 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[Cassandra Clare & her books: TMI/TID/TDA]

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03.

[Doctor Who]

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04.

[Canadian ice dancers Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir]

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05.

[Charmed]

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06.

[Criminal Minds - season 4, episode 8 "Masterpiece"]

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07.

[Tidying Up with Marie Kondo]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 38 secrets from Secret Submission Post #630.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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Whether or not it's good to throw things away, basically. There are some things (most notably books) that people probably do fetishize. And also, I think the underlying concept of "sparks joy" is a harder thing to talk about than people realize - we seem to have a hard time, as a culture, dealing with the idea of joy, and I think people find the idea of things "sparking joy" faintly absurd at times.

Which culture has a hard time with the idea of joy?

Suicide rings, death row, palliative care units, I'm sure there's more...

American culture? I don't want to generalize beyond that.

What I'm thinking about specifically is that I feel like we have this tendency to think of joy as something fundamentally divorced from and outside of common, everyday life. To think of it as something fundamentally extraordinary.

That's not my experience with it, which is why I asked. I dunno, maybe it's a regional thing.

I think you have a really weird perspective on life, no offense. Pretty much everyone I know talks about stuff like their afternoon Starbucks break or when their favorite song comes on the radio as something that makes them happy.

I think part of it is specific to the idea of "joy", not happiness? IDK

... they're the same thing, though?

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2019-01-21 04:07 (UTC) - Expand

I think the underlying concept of "sparks joy" is a harder thing to talk about than people realize - we seem to have a hard time, as a culture, dealing with the idea of joy, and I think people find the idea of things "sparking joy" faintly absurd at times.

I completely agree with this. To me "joy" is just a bad choice of words for this purpose. If I got rid of everything I own that doesn't "spark joy" I'd have nothing. I love stuff, but it doesn't give me joy. It gives me pleasure. It can give me comfort. It can be useful. It can be necessary. But it almost never gives me joy, and I don't expect it to.

Yeah... am I supposed to get rid of my standmixer because it doesn't give me joy? I mean... it gives me baked goods which is kind of the same thing, but still...

My vacuum cleaner is by nature an untidy piece of equipment and it sure as HELL doesn't bring me joy, but I'm keeping it regardless.

My vacuum cleaner doesn't spark joy -- especially since I can't store it without tripping over it. But clean floors definitely spark joy, and I can't clean them as easily without the vacuum, so there's a transitive property at work there.

Pretty sure things that are useful and/or necessary are exempt from that rule.

Yeah, they are. The "spark joy" is meant to be applied to things that aren't necessary/useful.

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2019-01-23 09:22 (UTC) - Expand

A lot of the controversy is more about the way that Kondo's ideas are presented in headlines and pop-media reporting, rather than in and of themselves.

That's kinda how it goes with most things these days tbh

Same.

nayrt - Same. There's lots of stuff I like, and stuff that doesn't "spark joy" but fuck it, I need it and can't just toss it away, that's bananas. I'm just not that emotionally attached to most objects.

Same. I just would never use the word joy in this context.

I think people get confused thinking that 'sparks joy' means they have to be wildly excited and overwhelmingly happy!happy!joy!joy! with something to say it 'sparks joy'.

If you have a literal towering heap of clothing (like a couple of the people did), that practically reaches the ceiling, some of that clothing you're going to look at and go 'why in fuck did i buy this?' and some you're going to go 'oh, yeah, this dress, the way the skirt swooshes, so fun!' . That's enough of a reaction, to me, to say it 'sparks joy'.

Yeah, this is how I always interpreted it. It's a pretty simple concept to me: does owning this thing make me happy? If not, and it isn't something that I need, then... why do I own it? Like, I still have a Sailor Moon doll that my best friend bought for me when we were 16. I'm not really that into Sailor Moon anymore, but it makes me happy because my friend had to look really hard to find it and so to me it's a symbol of how much she cares about me that she went to all of that trouble to get me something she knew I would like.

Exactly.

Yeah, this it's how I go about cleaning out my living space every year and the 'logic', if you will, that I use to determine what to keep and what to get rid of.

Is is necessary? Do I hold sentimental attachment/positive feelings towards it?

If the answer is no in both cases then I've been donating/throwing them out, and it's really been helping cleaning up so much of my clutter. (I'm not even close to the level that hoarders are, but I do hold onto things that I literally don't use or have any feelings towards. I need little gentle kicks up the butt to actually de-clutter my space so that I don't end up as someone with a towering pile of clothes I never wear).

I'm still going to be that lady with a shit-ton of books, but those give me pleasure to own and have on my shelves, I care about them, hence they'll stay(but neatly ordered and not in stacks on the floor like they were). And de-cluttering my knick-knacks and clothes has helped to free up that space.

Yup. I tend to hold on to a lot of things for sentimental reasons, but even those things i make myself deal with every few years; i only need so many pretty plates that were wedding gifts to my grandmother if i *never use them* (too pretty!!)

Books, though, yeah - i've got a ton, 99 percent of them are never gonna go away. I have zero issues getting rid of clothes, though i hate shopping, too, so i can't get *too* crazy, or i won't have anything at all, heh.

This is how I've been doing it too. If I haven't worn/used/touched/looked at it in the past year and it isn't something I have a need for (like fancy clothes - I almost never wear them but everyone needs some fancy clothes for special occasions) or have a personal attachment to, then out it goes. It's a good way to keep stuff from accumulating, because the longer you tell yourself "well, maybe I'll use it someday," the harder it then becomes to get rid of it.

I don't have too much junk but I'd like to have even less. But I keep thinking "Well I'd have to take those florescent bulbs to a special place, and I can't just throw that old laptop in the dumpster, so I'd have to take it to a different special place" and my brain gets derailed and I don't go through the drawer after all.

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