fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #4406 ]

[ SECRET POST #4406 ]

⌈ Secret Post #4406 ⌋

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The increasing amount of diversity in fiction is a great thing, it really is, but I still roll my eyes at the posts all 'I took my ________ (usually a small, cute kid) to see such and such and they were all :O they look like me' idek because I guess being a fat person I never went into anything with the expectation of people looking like me. Fat people are always either to be pitied or fixed or just made fun of. And they're usually stupid, dirty, and likely to be a traitor.

So it's a weird feeling to be all 'yay, that's great for you, but also whatever'.

I totally get this! I totally, completely get this and I totally feel the same way. And it's hard to address, because on the one hand, I don't think and would never want to suggest that the stigma against fat people is anything close to the oppression that's experienced by minorities. They're fundamentally different phenomenon.

At the same time, I think the stigma is undeniably, crushingly real and unjustifiable and harmful, and I wish there were better ways to talk about that and address that, and how pervasive it is in society, even in circles and among people who consider themselves woke. And how invisible it is. It should be possible to talk about, and get people who aren't fat to take it seriously. It's very frustrating. Fat people deserve to see heroes and representation as much as anyone does. I don't know how to address it.

Oh, absolutely. It's not the same as the oppression experienced by minorities and I would never want anyone to take that away from this sort of discussion, you know?

It's just... can we also have fat people who are more than the butt of the joke, the dirty loser living in their mom's basement, or the fatty who just needs skinny friends to make them over? And, yeah, it's almost impossible to have a conversation about because it's so ingrained into so many attitudes. 'That person's fat because they're lazy' 'oh my god, that fat person's getting a burger, that's why they're fat' and so on and so forth. It's tiring.

And I think the most frustrating thing is that even people who aren't fat who agree with this in principle, they never think of it. They just don't notice the absence of fat people or the roles that fat people get slotted into when they do appear. It's invisible to them.

I kind of get you. The thought of seeing more characters of the same ethnicity as myself in English-language canons is great and all but like... I'm still picky af about what I consume so when I get the sense that I should like a canon 'because diversity' I'm a lot more disappointed when I can't.

I saw another one of those "what cartoon characters would look like if they had real body measurements" posts the other day and all of them were made to look morbidly obese. K. So by real you just meant fat, because skinny people don't exist. Good to know.

I'm over it. I think we should have a bigger variety of body types in media, but fuck anyone who decides that their body type should be the gold standard.

I mean, I... wasn't suggesting that everyone should be fat in media?

oh. no I didn't think that. this is just what I'm eyerolling over at the moment personally on this subject.

Man.

I'm not saying you don't have a legitimate beef here, but the lack of respect that you feel is shown for skinny people by fat activists is so, so, so much less than the lack of respect shown for fat people by the rest of society. Just, like, how is this your priority? What the heck?

this hits home in an unusual way for me. I used to be fat, I lost over 130 lbs. and I'm healthier but I still have a face that can fucking crack glass, and in media unattractive people are still "to be pitied or fixed or just made fun of. And they're usually stupid, dirty, and likely to be a traitor." And it is not just my imagination. People I don't even know say horrible things to me when I'm just out in public minding my own business. they take my picture with their damn cell phones and laugh at me. I have a really sour expression on my passport picture because the photographer insulted me right before he took it.

Yeah, I get this. I’m short and fat and ugly and I don’t bother losing weight because I hate being hungry all the damn time when I’ll still be ugly and pretty much a shapeless blob with boobs even at a normal “healthy” weight.

I’ve been called a troll* by so many different guys I’ve lost count, while putting my hideousness on display by... waiting for the bus, carrying my groceries home, going Christmas shopping, walking to work... the nerve! How dare I exist in public while ugly! I’ve been told I was too ugly to wear nice clothes, called a dog, followed home by barking frat bros...

*I’ve also been called a gnome twice but I think those guys must’ve been confused; I don’t even own a pointy hat.

And “health” concern trolls drive me nuts. I’ve never drank, smoked, or taken drugs other than NSAIDS or prescribed antibiotics. I haven’t eaten meat for 25 years, I hate soda, I drink coffee maybe once or twice a year, and I cook most everything from scratch. I walk 5-9 miles a day most days; I walked ~1,886 miles last year and go hiking every week or so. I grow some of my own fruit and veg. But somehow none of that matters because I eat a lot and I’m fat.

Like, yeah, positive representation of fat and ugly people would be nice, but at this point, no matter how lonely I get sometimes, I’d rather just be invisible. I just want to exist in public without being harassed. I’d rather fat and ugly people not be in media at all than have more films and tv shows and books where we’re the last acceptable targets.

I know how much it hurts. Hugs if you want them but I don't want erasure. I want us to be the heroes. (and not just protagonists who are more victim than hero, like in Precious....)

Oh man. I feel you so much on every level.

I live next to a town with a lot of Chinese students studying in my country. I'm overweight, ugly and have bad skin and it seems to be irresistible to them. They love to film and laugh at me. Every fucking day. I hate it but what can I do?

Filming someone without their consent is a pretty big deal.Is there not someone in their school you can go to and say "hey your students are filming me without my consent"?

I apologize if I'm not well versed in these things. But I hope you find a way to get them to stop. Hugs if you want them.

Yeah, I'm a fat over-40 woman and roll my eyes any time I hear people talk about representation.

I don't think this means that representation is bad, it just means that we need to keep expanding it.

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[ SECRET POST #4406 ]

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