case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2019-05-24 06:12 pm

[ SECRET POST #4522 ]


⌈ Secret Post #4522 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.



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02.
[The Matrix]


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03.
[Mr Meaty]


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04.
[Roxanne from A Goofy Movie]


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05. [SPOILERS for Game of Thrones]



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06. [SPOILERS for Game of Thrones]

[Arya/Gendry]


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07. [SPOILERS for Game of Thrones]



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08. [SPOILERS for Avengers Endgame]



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09. [SPOILERS for Avengers Endgame]



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10. [SPOILERS for Dawson's Creek]



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11. [WARNING for abuse, etc.]

[ProJared]



















Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #647.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Re: What's your opinion on casual misandry?

(Anonymous) 2019-05-25 02:59 pm (UTC)(link)
It isn't based on the idea that no harm or damage done to an individual man by a woman will ever count, it's based on the idea that any harm or damage done to an individual man by a woman is an individual act rooted in individual psychology and not reinforced by generations of cultural opinion and policy.

Like, take the example above about a woman refusing to give a man a job on the basis of gender. That's one woman running one company, in a world where a significant majority of executives and management with hiring power are men, and where men are currently and have been historically considered suitable for employment in nearly any field they wish to pursue, and the few exceptions are considered beneath them. That hypothetical woman did a shitty thing to that hypothetical man, something that probably hurt his feelings and may have hurt him financially if he happened to be unemployed, but it's a single incident. It isn't something he can worry about plausibly happening at the next three or thirty or three hundred jobs he applies for.

The relationship between sexism and power doesn't mean an individual incident is inconsequential as an individual incident, it's saying it's inconsequential as part of an analysis of overall trends. It's not reinforced by generations of social doctrine. A woman can absolutely hurt a man, a woman can have power over a man - but women as a class do not have the institutional power and cultural weight to harm men as a class. It isn't devaluing women to say that, it's looking at the reality of our social and political structure.
thewakokid: (Default)

Re: What's your opinion on casual misandry?

[personal profile] thewakokid 2019-05-25 03:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Right, but we're not talking about big societal trends. we are talking about a thing one person says or does to another person, and we are assigning greater or lesser values of wrongness based not on the act, but based on the name you give it. The only way the name of the act is important, "this we will call sexism, this we will not, even tho the act is the same" is of any significance is if you say "When we give the act this label it is worse".

I do not believe any single of sexism is better or worse depending on the gender of the agressor or the victim. Making a distinction that "some men have more power so we're more ok to do this thing to this one man" is the very definition of injustice.

I would say that a hatred of men is misandry even if you are right that the fact it's less common means it's not a big deal.

Re: What's your opinion on casual misandry?

(Anonymous) 2019-05-25 04:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Of course we're talking about societal trends, because nothing occurs in a vacuum. It's given a different name precisely because of societal weight. It's only "worse" in that acts of sexism are acts that reinforce sexist culture and policy, while the same act with the gender reversed doesn't reinforce anything - and generally speaking doesn't even have the effect of damaging sexist culture and policy.

You can call hatred of men misandry if you want, but that doesn't make misandry a credible social issue.
thewakokid: (Default)

Re: What's your opinion on casual misandry?

[personal profile] thewakokid 2019-05-25 06:04 pm (UTC)(link)
"Nothing occurs in a vacuum" is the most meaningless buzzphrase to come out of either side.

"Kings murder paupers much more often than paupers murder kings, so we don't really need to care if a paupers kills a king" is bullshit. the frequency of the evil, or the people involved in the evil does not lessen the evil. I'm trying to assume good faith here, but this flipping it from individuals being harmed to "No, it should only be about people as statistics, and as statistics men being harmed doesn't matter" is such monumental goalpost shifting... "No, we don't actually care about people being hurt after all, we care about the identity or the class being hurt, that's all that matters" I mean... It's getting hard to not see that as just shifting the focus from protecting people to pushing only one side because you only care about one side.
thewakokid: (Default)

Re: What's your opinion on casual misandry?

[personal profile] thewakokid 2019-05-25 06:08 pm (UTC)(link)
I mean taking you at your word, there are now two possible ways to interpret this argument, either my original "We care about people as individual entities, and as individual entities women will always be too weak to hurt men" or what it now sounds like you're saying which is "We don't care about individuals, we just want to make sure the statistics balance, and since the statistics show women as a group are hurt more often than men, we only need to combat one side of this to make the numbers balance out"

And frankly I can't tell which option I have a bigger problem with.
Edited 2019-05-25 18:09 (UTC)