[ SECRET POST #4655 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4655 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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08. [SPOILERS for Chicago Med]

[Conner/Ava]







Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #666.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Rant and Vent Thread

[(Anonymous)]

Apparently, depression is supposed to be “I’m numb all the time and I don’t care about anything”. If that’s the case, then what is it that I have that just makes me feel really sad for no reason? Why can’t I even have the normal form of a mental disorder so I can at least relate to others, instead of what preteens think the disorder is supposed to be? It’s frustrating to see “relatable” posts about depression and think “not me”.

I know outright wishing for other people’s problems is wrong, but I wish I felt a big gaping hole of nothing. I’ve always felt too much (after 20 years of being written off as a dramatic brat, psychs decided that I wasn’t exaggerating; surprise, parents and teachers!) and I’ve always thought that I would give anything to be numb. I’d gladly sacrifice my positive emotions to get rid of my negative ones and feel nothing at all.

Re: Rant and Vent Thread

[(Anonymous)]

That is all depression, much like insomnia, it comes in many different forms and woes. Everyone is different, and will react differently as their lifestyles and depression manifests. I don't think it's bad at all to try to find something to relate to when you feel so down. Even if that means wishing your condition on those around you. There's nothing wrong with wanting someone to be there with you to talk to. <33

For different forms of depression:
https://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/depression-types#1

Personally I've gone through the 'not feeling anything' depression, (currently actually) and have been battling various forms of it for most my life. In the early days of taking my most recent medication, I actually wished for that feeling back because (while I was still suffering) even the most basic of chores became tedious, where as before I was so given up on myself I only did them because I knew it would cause problems with those I lived with.

Best of luck! I'm glad people are finally hearing you for you, hopefully you'll find content more suited to you in the future!

Re: Rant and Vent Thread

[(Anonymous)]

I can relate to this. I don’t really connect to the whole “feeling numb all the time” description of depression either. For me depression is mostly just being either exhausted or one tiny nudge away from exhausted, 100% of the time - like I’m a battery that won’t hold a charge. And not feeling much of a positivity kick when I do manage to accomplish something.

But I do have short periods of deep sadness sometimes, and I can imagine how hard it must be to live with that feeling all the time. I’m sorry you have to deal with that. Seconding that everyone is different and depression comes in a wide variety of awful.