case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2008-12-25 04:22 pm

[ SECRET POST #720 ]


⌈ Secret Post #720 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

101.
[Morning Musume]


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102.
[Anastasia]


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103.
[Johnathan Larson]


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104.
[Hana Yori Dango / Twilight]


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105.


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106.
[Johnny Yong Bosch, Vic whatever]


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107.
[X-Men Origins, Gambit]


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108.


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109.


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110.
[Life]


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111.


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112.
[AFK FOREVER]


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113.


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114.


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115.
[Linebarrels of Iron/Kurogane no Linebarrels]


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116.


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117.
[Hellsing]


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118.


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119.


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120.
[Gurren Lagann]


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121.


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122.
[Britannia High]


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123.


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124.


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125.


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126.


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127.


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128.
[The Christmas Toy]


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129.


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130.
[MST3K, Joel Hodgson]


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131.


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132.


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133.
[Persona 4]


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134.
[Naruto]


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135.
[Ansem Retort]


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136.


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137.


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138.
[Transformers G1]


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139.
[Persona 4]


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140.
[TWilight]


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141.


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142.


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143.


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144.


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145.


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146.


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147.
[Lost]


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148.


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149.


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150.


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151.
[Misha Collins]


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152.
[Ranma 1/2]


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153.


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154.


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155.
[Torchwood]


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156.


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157. [removed]


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158.
[The Divine Comedy / Devil May Cry]


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159.


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160.


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161.
[Supernatural]


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162.


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163.


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164.


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165.
[Supernatural]


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166.


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167.


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168.
[6Teen; Jude]


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169.


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170.
[Phantom of the Opera]


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171.


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172.
[Lipstick Jungle]


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173.


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174.


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175.



Notes:

Early 'cause Christmas stuff to do!

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 086 secrets from Secret Submission Post #103.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 1 2 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 3 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

[identity profile] van.livejournal.com 2008-12-29 03:30 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, um, no. That's not a reason, sorry. Tons of people have nothing to do with their blood relatives. Parents disown their children, siblings grow apart or hate each other. Hell, siblings sometimes don't even know each other exist and meet decades later. Full or half-blood siblings grow up in separate houses, in different states. Cousins may never meet. Parents are under absolutely no obligation to love unconditionally, nor do kids always love their parents, nor do siblings always care about each other.

If a sister falls in love with her brother and then they "break up" it can be exactly like a "regualr" break up. Maybe it will be awkward because you have the same parent(s), but that is just one of the factors involved in starting a relationship with a family member. It's one of many risks present, just like all relationships have. (Does the white girl want to date the black man even though she might get shit from it from someone? Does the man want to admit he loves other men even though he might get killed for it? Does the 60 year old want to date the 30 year old because s/he might be in it for money and not love? Do you want to date someone at all because they might break your heart? What if they live across the world?)

Every relationship has different risks. That's not a reason not to do it.

[identity profile] graciebird.livejournal.com 2008-12-29 07:05 pm (UTC)(link)
It fully is a reason. Also, to clarify, I think I misspoke above. I don't mean "blood" literally - an adoptive parent or child is still a parent or child. My mistake.

I am more than aware that not all families stick together. Families are not under any obligation to stick together, but you can't deny that it is the ideal. Parents are under no obligation to love their children, but ideally, they should. Brothers are under no obligation to care about each other, but ideally, they should. True, this does not always happen, which is why I'm arguing for a negotiable family structure as opposed to the nuclear family of a mom, a dad, and two kids. I think we can agree that if a parent fails to play a nurturing role (ie being abusive or absent) it is a problem - you rarely hear of a child who is overjoyed that his or her parents don't love him or her. What's more, regardless of WHO is in your family, everyone needs a space where they can receive support free from romantic and sexual overtones which, though not always, can often be threatening when unwanted. Let's be honest, while sex and romance are fine and dandy, there is an element of the hunt to both. When it is introduced, trust changes - IE is your mom listening to your problems and helping you with your homework because she loves you as a daughter, or because she thinks your hot and wants to get in your pants? If it's the latter, can you ever look at your mom in the same way that you need to look at her?

Your argument is like stating that murders shouldn't happen, but since they do, they shouldn't be illegal.

The reason romantic/sexual relationships between family members are WAY more problematic, minimal risk or not, is because there are already relationship and power dynamics that are set in the family, more-so than the girl at school or the man across the world. Imagine growing up at sixteen, knowing that your dad has an eye on you, and is just waiting until you're eighteen to make a move. What if it's unreciprocated? True, you talk it over and nothing happens because your dad is a nice guy, but the fact remains that he is your dad, you are under his power, and such dynamics have a way of leaving a mark. Now you'll distance yourself from him so as not to lead him on, creating a rift in your family, or perhaps even grow scornful.

As an analogy, liken it to violence; getting into a fistfight with a kid at school is way different from getting into a fistfight with your mom. One of those things is generally socially acceptable, the other is abuse. This isn't because the law assumes your mom is stronger or that moms shouldn't have the capabilities for physical violence, but because SHE IS YOUR MOTHER, and what she does will impact you differently from what anyone else does. It's the same with sex: sex with someone from school is different from sex with your mom, no matter how consenting both parties are.

I'm not saying that incest cannot happen. It does all the time. What I'm saying is that it SHOULDN'T happen, as it is in no way compatible with our society. True, there are a lot of things about our society that are not at all fantastic, but the idea of a solid support base of relatives, blood or not, that will provide a safe place free of romantic and sexual interest really is something of value and worth.