[ SECRET POST #5166 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #5166 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


01.
[Spirited Away]



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02.
[Jerma985]


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03. [WARNING for mention of rape]

[Faction Paradox]


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04. [WARNING for mention of sexual harassment/possibly underage]

[David Boreanz and Alyson Hannigan]


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05. [WARNING for mention of sexual abuse/grooming]



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06. [WARNING for mention of sexual harassment]



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07. [WARNING for mention of sexual harassment/abuse, cannibalism fetish]



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08. [WARNING for mention of sexual harassment/domestic violence]

[Trent Reznor, Marilyn Manson]


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09. [WARNING for mention of domestic violence/abuse]



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10. [WARNING for mention of sexual violence/noncon]



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11. [WARNING for mention of rape]

[Eiyu Senki]



























Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #739.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

09. [WARNING for mention of domestic violence/abuse]
https://i.imgur.com/QIKezaI.png

[(Anonymous)]

Reccing the graphic novel 'Laura Dean Keeps Breaking Up With Me' by Mariko Tamaki and Rosemary Valero-O'Connell. It covers more on emotional abuse but god did it remind me so much of the relationship with my ex.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm so sorry that happened to you, nonny. The only media I've seen that deals with female on female abuse is Carmen Maria Machado's memoir "In The Dream House." It's a great read, but it's also super brutal about her psychological abuse and definitely one I kinda hesitate to rec to people.

[(Anonymous)]

I also was going to rec In the Dream House. Its hard but a good read

[thewakokid]

Lazy writing. Simple as.

Are you going to put in the work to recreate the wheel and lead the reader to a new understanding of different types of abuse, and then put in the work to show how horrid it is, and THEN milk that horror for emotional investment?

Or are you going to use the tools that already exist: "Drunk man beats wife" / "Drunk woman acts like stereotypical abusive dude and beats wife" and just milk the preexisting horror?

Once people get numb to the run-of-the-mill abuse in media, they MIGHT start looking elsewhere... but never far enough.

[(Anonymous)]

I don't know, I always see people bring up "hurrr lesbian relationships are THE most abusive out all relationships" statistic like it's 13/50 (an excuse to shit on lesbians, basically), without looking further into the nuances. And popularizing that idea in media sounds like it'd just be feeding into that stereotype.

[(Anonymous)]

... What's this statistic? How are they?

[(Anonymous)]

There's a difference between perpetuating a stereotype of lesbians = abusive relationships, and people telling a story that acknowledges that abuse can happen in the same way that abuse can developed in straight relationships. After all there's endless amount of stories where a woman is in an abusive relationship with a boyfriend/husband or they're recovering from dealing with said abuse - it doesn't automatically mean that there only ever abusive relationships between men and women because of the existence of these stories, but acknowledge that they do exist regardless of how they are told.

Domestic abuse in m/m and f/f relationships have the additional pressure of trying to prove that they are just as valid and are not immoral/an oddity for existing - which unfortunately means a lot of relationships that do experience said abuse end up suffering in silence and are unlikely to reach out for help. (Thankfully there are more organizations now that specializes in helping lgbt+ folks going through domestic abuse then there were years prior).

Stories can touch people in ways that can help them cope or feel that their experience is not an isolating one at that. When I read Laura Dean Keeps Breaking Up With Me, it had been years after breaking up with an ex who was manipulative and abusive - which was so hard since it felt like I couldn't turn to anyone for help, not even lgbt+ friends because most had encouraged me to stay through 'the hard times' until it was suppose to get better somehow. I ended up having to find the strength by myself to leave and cut out everyone that pretty much was on her side for the sake of my deteriorating mental health.
It was so isolating and there was a short time where I even fell into the belief that it all happened because I'm gay and it was some form of abstract punishment from the universe for not trying harder to be normal. Thankfully I made better friends and became a part of another section of the lgbt+ community and began to recover.

Reading that comic made me burst into tears finding a story that felt so relatable - and it didn't leave me thinking that all lesbians are abusive. It showed that even in an idealic queer positive setting and community, its a type of relationship that can happen - but more importantly that the victim of an abusive relationship has hope of moving forward with support of friends/family as well as struggling with realizations that can push yourself to make difficult decisions that will hopefully do more good than the current situation down the road.

By all means its not a perfect story, but it shouldn't have to be perfect. It should be part of a variety of stories to be told from different aspects to both spread awareness as well as reach out to those who are/have suffered through that kind of abuse.

[(Anonymous)]

Thanks for the recs everyone!