fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #5348 ]

[ SECRET POST #5348 ]

⌈ Secret Post #5348 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

[Dhux's Scar]

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02.

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03.

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04. [SPOILERS for The Green Knight]

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05. [SPOILERS for Song of Farca]

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06. [WARNING for incest/underage ship]

[Enola Holmes]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #765.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Oh please. If someone chooses to be picky about their friends they are fully able to do that without being privileged. If it means they'd rather be alone rather than be wary of everyone then that's their choice.

Listen there's "picky" and "miserable and alone to the point of having literally no one around them because you really can't fucking know in the South, because plenty of people SAY they're fine with The Gays until one crushes on them and then they become violent"

It is 100% privileged because it says they never had to make that choice, never had to be 100% alone and isolated and scared. They'd always have SOMEONE.

This is projecting a lot into someone else's personal choices.

And have you considered, since the anon said they were queer, that they had been burnt by this before and therefore is now avoiding the chance of it happening again?

Simply avoiding being friends with people who might turn out that way is a great way to avoid that happening to you. Especially in the South. Even if it means they're lonelier than you personally care to be, or have fewer friends that you personally care to have.

Jumping immediately to "privilege" and assuming people who don't agree with you don't know anything is such a fandom thing to do sigh

You're missing it in that, yeah, you could avoid anyone who COULD be. But that's everyone who hasn't been crushed on by a queer before. Incidents where someone queer was hurt physically by someone who had been previously accepting suddenly changing their mind when they were being crushed on by someone queer are a dime a dozen.

And you are missing that there are way more steps between stranger, distant acquaintance, familiar acquaintance, casual friend, close friend, and best friend than you're assuming. You can have positive and friendly distant relationships with people, especially for example in the workplace, or be kind to strangers and neighbors or hang out with people on a casual basis, without needing to be their friend or best friend in a personal sense.

Anon did not say they hermit and avoid everyone, as you seem to missed. They said they are not and would not be friends with certain people. I would venture that most people are not friends with most of the people they interact with on a daily basis. I am not either!

If someone wants to avoid that kind of closer relationship with someone who is not confirmed cool with queer people or the idea of queer relationships, such as limiting yourself to fellow queer people and outspoken allies for example, what exactly is so wrong about that? Can you tell me what exactly is so wrong about that idea itself, especially in an area where bigotry is rampant?

And yes, before "privilege" is thrown out again, I realize there are areas in which queer people and outspoken allies don't live, but we and everyone reading this have the internet now in the year of our lord 2021. Given that this is a fandom community and presumably everyone here is in fandom, if someone's choices are for example to have a circle of queer friends online then more power to them tbh. More people should go on and be their picky selves about who they consider friends in general imo.

Sure, Jan. Sure. Not everyone lives in areas of high queer acceptance like your stupid ass. Hope you never have to deal with this.

The thing you keep missing, so I will put in tinier words so you do understand, is that even outspoken queer allies may not, in fact, be allies when queers finally show open attraction to them! These people are a dime a dozen! You will see them as allies until you confess, and then they might fucking assault you! So unless you can verify that they won't, then you can't say for sure! So it's extremely privileged to go "just like allies and other queers" when the latter might be hard to find because you're in a bigoted area and even trying to find some would put you at risk, and the former might not be telling the truth!

Oof, there you go assuming again. Anything more I say will be dismissed as privilege whether I have it or not, so I'll let you go. Good luck with your life, anon.

Good luck with yours, but you just remind me of every straighty I've talked to who insists they're no privileged at all. You have multiple people in this thread telling you what's up and why, and you're so busy whining that the world is improved in all places enough that this isn't a problem as we can all afford to extremely curate our friendships because uwu sof online safe spaces uwuwuwuwuwuwuwu and bullshit like that.

Sure, but then logically you'd have to cut ties with everyone who you're not 100% sure is not a homophobe, and that's, well... both sad for you and shitty for all the people you cut out of your life without telling them why.

As I said, if someone chooses that, that's their choice. People who have been badly burnt by religion are like that about religion too and that's another heavily unavoidable thing in certain areas. While it might end up in them having few friends, it doesn't immediately make them privileged like anon is accusing them of being.

It 100% fucking does, because they CAN afford to curate friendships where some people can't even afford to be out.

Aren't you also projecting onto that anon? They didn't say anything about being alone. It sounds to me like the reason they can't imagine having to make that choice is because, like many of us, they're fortunate enough not to have to face it.

+1000 it's great that some people in this thread haven't had to experience this kind of acceptance of fear but...god, not everyone has that chance.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

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