fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #5886 ]

[ SECRET POST #5886 ]

⌈ Secret Post #5886 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Stargate SG-1]

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09. [SPOILERS for Treasure Planet]

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10. [WARNING for discussion of incest]

[Vampire Game]

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11. [WARNING for possible discussion of transphobia (JK Rowling related)]

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12. [WARNING for discussion of transphobia, other bigotry, suicide]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #842.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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"but don't be shocked if that decision makes it harder for trans folk to trust you to have their back on larger issues than this."

Next time try to walk in egg shells so you can understand your "friends". Gotcha.

Sorry, no. Buying the game gives Rowling money. She uses her money and influence to promote her transphobic views. It is absolutely understandable that a trans person wouldn't trust someone willing to give money to a transphobe like Rowing.

Yes, exactly. There is no other interpretation of this statement.

NA - Yeah, I kind of agree. If my friends, who have demonstrated their personal character in myriad ways over the years, want to engage with media created in part by someone who is bigoted or judgmental of people like me, so fucking what? People way worse than JKR have created some really good art. There's art/media I enjoy that's created in part (or even in full) by people who are bigoted and judgmental of people like me; I'm sure as shit not going to expect my friends to swear off content they enjoy because it's created by someone problematic when I myself do not.

DA. Not only that but a lot of us have grown up with that. I don't support her views but I'm not giving up all the joy her books have brought me over the years and I won't stop writing fic or participating in fandom either because she turned out to be a trashfire sort of person.

tbh it's one of the reasons I generally don't look up anything about creators of content I consume. I don't want to know. The only reason I know about her is because of her being such a big name.

Not mention also that most of the time people use the "Do this or else" kind of ultimatums and is so frustrating. We barely speak nor do contact, yet you "smell" I want to buy HL and suddenly we are BFF but want to break that "friendship" over a game?.

DA

Wow, if people are wanking like that about it, around you, I'm pretty sure you're better off without them. That sounds really, extravagantly petty.

DA

+1000

interesting take you got there, did JK Rowling pick it out for you?

It would have been way too obvious if JK Rowling pick it out for me.

I didn't realize it was a tall order to be aware of other people, current events, and things that impact marginalized groups. I just thought that was being a good human. You know, not being dismissive of others' concerns when there are real reasons for them to have concerns.

Or are you so comfortable in your privilege that you can't be bothered to expand your existing worldview?

Not that anon but what an extremely patronizing sanctimonious little response this is, I'm surprised I'm seeing it on DW and not Tumblr circa those "friendly reminder that" posts.

DA

I know right? Though, I can't say I'm that surprised to find it here. I just still don't get why anyone thinks the "I get to decide what you have to do to be a good person" tirade makes them look like anything but a spiteful and very controlling person, themselves.

That's a very interesting interpretation in itself.

Nobody can really control what others choose to buy, enjoy or think.

You'd be amazed how much gross emotional blackmail goes into trying, though. Or at least, I was.

'I didn't realize it was a tall order to be aware of other people, current events, and things that impact marginalized groups. I just thought that was being a good human. You know, not being dismissive of others' concerns when there are real reasons for them to have concerns'

The irony being, this applies to both fucking sides. God I hate people.

This is such a strange answer.
What kind of friendship do you have? Do you trust every single friend you have on every issue?

I have friends that treat their stuff and animals very badly and I wouldn't TRUST them with my possessions or pet under certain circumstances.
Or friends that drive when tipsy and when they do that I don't trust them and call a taxi.
Or cis straight friends who say insentive comments about gay people (I'm a lesbian) in front of me that I don't trust on making a fully informed argument about LGBTQ issues.

They are still my friends, I love them and respect them. But I don't trust them and their judgement 100% on everything whatsoever.

So yeah, when a friend of mine bought HL and boasted about it and then sent to the ground a fairly innocent trasphobic joke about all this issue I though JESUS. HE'S A FUCKING INSENSITIVE MORON ABOUT THIS.
He's still a good person and I love him, but I'm not going to automatically assume he will fight for trans issues when it'll be needed.
If he'll do it, then GOOD, AWESOME. But if he will not, I will not be surprised...

Every person have a different set of values. I respect that. I don't automatically think that people with different ideas from mine are BAD PEOPLE TM, but I don't trust my friends to follow all my principles and fight for all my battles. And that's OK.

The problems here with JKR and Harry Potter is when people call themselves "an ally" and they can't do the bare minimum of the inaction of not buying a video game... It's the self proclaimed allies.

DA

Wow, you need better friends.

nayrt but I kind of agree. Or at least don't rank them very high on the list of friendships.

Nobody is perfect but some people just stun with their shamelessly ignorant expressions.

AYART

My situation could be different than yours and a lot of people here because I have good friends from different cultural backgrounds, ages and nationalities.

For example, I am 100% always against the death panalty and I've advocated in first person to improve the living conditions of prisoners. ...you'd be surprised (or maybe not) how many people don't give a fuck about prisoners' rights or justify the death penalty "because some people are monsters and they deserve to die".
If a friends of mine is in favour of the death penalty when I am absolutely 100% against it, does it mean they are a "bad friend"? NAH. It just means they have a different set of values than mine. I respect that, but I don't trust their judgment when it comes to voting in favour of prisoners' human rights.
I still feel very safe and confortable talking about my different point of view, they are my friends after all, not violent savages or online trolls, but I don't expect them to have my exact ideals, fights and values. Everyone is different.

My very best friends, who are... maybe 2? I trust them completely. The other 8 or so than I call my friends? They are still my friends, they help me and accept me, but I tend to cut them some slack on some stuff.
I come from a very homophobic and bigoted country. I try to introduce some social issues and different points of view to them, but I absolutely know they will not accept them 100% at first. It takes times. Some people are not online like us or come from a very protected or homogeneous background.
It doesn't automatically mean they are bad people or bad friends. They still respect me and value my ideas, even if they don't understand them 100% or care about them as much as I do. Many of them come to me to ask about my thoughts on LGBTQ+ or racial issues, because they know I have some imputs they never thought about and they value them.

IDK I just don't like living in a echo chamber and expecting every one to be the same as me. Even people that make ignorant and insulting remarks can be good people as long as they admit they are wrong and they have stuff to learn from other people.
I do, too. I'm not morally correct 100% of times, I'm sure.
For me friendship is respecting the other person completely, even if sometimes we don't agree with them.

*also when I wrote that some of my friends treat animals "very badly" I was thinking about not providing pets with outside space (ex. apartment cats/dogs or birds/reptiles in cages) and picking them up when they really don't want to just because they want to cuddle them, but the animals is distressed and want to go away. It's a VERY VERY prividedged point of view from me. (also, yeah, I was exaggerating too much on this. I apologize. I'm not very good at English and expressing myself)
My friends are not cruel to animals. I wouldn't be friends with anyone who hurts animals. OH but I'm vegetarian (I can't be vegan due to health and money problems) and I have friends who are not and/or eat a lot of meat.

BTW I agree that I need more friends that care about trans issues.
Problem is, there are not many people like that where I live lol and internet friendship is still friendship, but it's also limited for me, since I pass the vast majority of my time offline.

DA personally yeah, I do feel the need to trust my friends on most important issues. If they can't be trusted to, say, cook a good-tasting meal, that's one thing, but when it comes to actual moral issues, I tend to categorize those people as "friendly acquaintances" at best, not friends.

I wholly agree with your last paragraph, though. Nobody /needs/ a damn video game.

That's a... very disingenuous interpretation of what I said.

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[ SECRET POST #5886 ]

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