[ SECRET POST #6042 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6042 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 42 secrets from Secret Submission Post #864.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Inspired by #1 - anxiety!

[(Anonymous)]

My anxiety (semi-diagnosed? the one therapist i went to in college was more focused on The Autism but mentioned the idea once or twice?) is so bad around sex that I've basically just stopped dating because my sex drive and desire for a relationship isn't enough to make pushing through it worth it.

Like, okay, first off you have to be naked, which is awkward and weird and I always feel like my body language is off when I don't have clothing on, which just makes me more awkward and weird. Then there's the whole issue around communication - what if I suggest something the other person doesn't want and it makes it awkward? what if I talk too much or too little and make it awkward? what if the way I Do Sex is just weird? what if my body language is off and things go off from where I expect it? I mean, even if we decide to just Not it's not like I can just ditch, there's gonna be like 5 minutes of being awkward, even more if this is, like, an actual relationship.

Also, I fucking hate any kind of talking dirty, but I've found that a lot of people tend to not like just being silent during sex. So they'll be trying to do a thing, but like half the time that involves pointing something out about my body/body language/actions, and even if it's positive it's still just awkward because it's not like I can just smile and nod if I don't know what to say. They expect me to actually say something back, and I can't formulate a compliment that isn't extremely awkward to save my life. And if it isn't EXTREMELY explicitly positive I wind up second-guessing whether it was a compliment or them pointing out something awkward or what.

Sorry this is so long, I have a lot of thoughts about how weird and awkward and anxiety-inducing sex is :/