[ SECRET POST #6056 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6056 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 48 secrets from Secret Submission Post #866.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT

All of what you're saying about why people think it hurts seems likely to me. It's easy to hurt someone or get hurt when inexperience with sex intersects with "wanting to seem a lot more confident and knowledgeable than you actually are." When IMO, there shouldn't be any shame in treating each situation and partner like something to be explored, to whatever extent you and they need that.

>>i doubt those guys did more than slap some lube around and shove.

Unfortunately. And I've definitely seen guides online trying to correct that behavior like, "if you want her to have the kind of experience with anal that involves ever wanting to let you do that again, don't hurt your girlfriend by trying to do too much too fast, or by doing a perfunctory job trying to get her aroused, first. Porn stars have experience and they're being paid good money," and then explaining that having sex with another person should involve adapting what you do to what will feel good to them. All of which is important stuff.

But you've got a point that none of those issues are actually exclusive to anal.

And yeah - I think some of this may change (the lack of knowledge) just because the social cost of being openly uncloseted has dropped significantly since the laws got a lot less miserable to gay people in the US and the EU. But only if people actually explore the things they didn't use to feel like they could talk about.

Glad you liked the links!