fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #6075 ]

[ SECRET POST #6075 ]

⌈ Secret Post #6075 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

[Fallen London]

__________________________________________________

03.

[Krazy Kat]

__________________________________________________

04.

[The Lost Tomb]

__________________________________________________

05.

__________________________________________________

06.

__________________________________________________

07.

__________________________________________________

08.

__________________________________________________

09.

[Transcript: I swear the hell, none of you people think writing is "real" art that takes "real" effort, not compared to the other kinds.]

__________________________________________________

10.

[Transcript: I bought a red immersion blender just so I could name it Tom Servo.]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 12 secrets from Secret Submission Post #868.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

What names would you give a cat? - OR - if you have/had a cat, what were their name/s?

I think the name Pip would be a pretty cute name for a cat.

My friend had a cat named Molly, but would often give her endless amount of other names relating to the nickname Mouse like Mousey and Lady Mouse.

I named our family tabby cat after Spyro the dragon when I was 11 because I loved the game, and while he wasn't purple he was cute so, kitty Spyro!

A lot of the other names were fairly standard: a Gizmo, a Lulu, a Fluffy. I've yet to get my own cats as an adult but I kinda wanna call a black one Loki. But knowing me I'll call them one thing and then call them by a nickname the rest of the time.

I actually named my dog Loki. He's a very fluffy black and tan pomeranian so it was kinda meant to be tongue in cheek. The only reason I really went with it was because my very big ginger bunny was already named Thor and I wanted to have my own pantheon.

But when my brother met him, he immediately started calling him Kiki (slang for penis in our mother tongue) and it stuck.

Little shit
Stinker
Motherfucker
Bitch on the cracker
Lubby dubs
Mango chutney little bitch
pumpkin porter
the void in Justin Bieber's asshole
blueblbubulbubuebeubublubeulbebebuelbuebeluble
Socks

sorry i'm drunk and lying
i would never name a cat SOCKS

I had a neighbor who named her cat stockings because the kitty had two very long white paws and legs against her brown fur.

LOL

Future potential cat names (depending on color, sex, etc.):
Mairon and/or Sauron
Thu or Tevildo
Leia
Spot
Bilbo
Toothless
Dalek
Ozma
Vader

Buffy Anne "Flufferbutt" Summers Vampire Slayer

I named our first cat Simba

The cats my family had when I was born were Louis and Louisa. Both boys, but when they were young it was hard to tell. Including them even though of course I did not name them.

First cat I named: Moon, a little tuxedo kitten we got when I was small.

Second cat I named was Picky-Picky, named her after Ramona Quimby's cat.

Montgomery was next, I had him only for a short while because he was rescued from under a dumpster and had some health issues, but his brief life was a happy one where he was loved and pampered. He was named after my favorite character from the movie Fame. This was end of high school/start of college.

Then I had Momo for seventeen years, and basically I knew I was ready to move on and have another cat because we had a friend who did animal rescue work who told me she had a litter of kittens who needed loving homes and that I was one of the first people she thought of.

I'm currently not in a place where I can bring home a new cat, but it's something I do look forward to doing *after* I've moved and can make a stable home for a couple. So I'm thinking a lot about names, and it really depends on what the cats I meet are like.
I like 'Dima' quite a lot, I like 'Jenny Anydots'. I like 'Dorian'-- if one of my next cats looks like Montgomery, I'd go with 'Dorian'. And I like 'Binx' for a black cat because I'm a spooky bitch of a certain age.

In the meantime, the neighbor cats that come into the yard whose real names I don't know are Mewsette (white), James Bond (tuxedo), Augustus (orange, but if I'd known Mewsette when we met him, he'd be Jaune-Tom-- we first saw him in August and also he is an intact male with the bearing of one who believes himself emperor at least), Frank Sinatra (point cat, so he's got big blue eyes), and Gandalf (grey and white, both bases covered)

My cats have been Athena (Theenie) and Tasslehoff (Tassle). I also grew up with a Cleopatra (Cleo) and a Cassiopeia (Cassie) and a Chloe.

I love these names!

David Tasslehoff!

Perseus, aka Dumbass, Old Man, and Stinkybutt.

Reznor, aka Tollbooth, Mr Floofypants, and Dood.

If I had a ginger cat - Archimedes. If I had a black cat - Galileo.

I have a cat. His name is Void but I also call him Biteyhands McBastardpants.

Crash Bandicat.
Hopalong Catsidy.
Figgy Pudding.
Saskia.

once upon a time we had miss Mai Valentine. she wandered into our apartment and that was just the right name for her attitude. now we have Sadie and Oliver, who we didn't name, but we kept their names out of appreciation for the young girls whose family had to give them up. so instead we gave them unique titles: Marquisse de Sadie, Destroyer of Toys, and Oliver Bughunter.

there is no name too dumb for a cat unless it's a word that is legitimately awful in all contexts. I still laugh every time at the Family Guy joke where Adam West (RIP) laughed and said "Paul! That's a ridiculous name for a cat! Paul!" sometimes their personalities tell you who they are, and sometimes you just feel like naming them Paul, or Butters, or Floofington.

Astrophe
Aclysm
Erwaul
Egory
Nip
Nap
Sup

I’m a dog person through-&-through, but I found a cat a few months ago, and before I found its owners I did have to consider this question. Would have to go with either Princess Arjumand or Penwiper for the To Say Nothing of the Dog reference. :D

My cat is called Elsa.

I ... actually called my cat Krazy Kat a lot. (I didn't know there was an existing character by this name!)

Buckle up y'all, 'cause you're in for a long ride. So, I currently have seven cats. I used to have just two, before a stray had babies in my back yard two years ago and they just moved in and took over the house despite our efforts to rehome them. But anyway, here are their names:

Miss Chi, seen here in my icon, has been here since about 2015. She was named after the title character of Chi's Sweet Home, and we've done our best to make it one for her. She's a sweet baby angel who produces her body weight in hair every day, and if you scratch her back or neck she'll lick either your other hand or face, whichever is nearest. When she's hungry, she will find the nearest human, stare intently at them until they notice her, and then she will lead them to her food dish, stopping and looking back every so often to make sure they're following her. At this point she's basically my dad's cat, but she is, of course, beloved by all. Well, all except for...

Maya Miette, a beautiful greyish calico we found at a used car lot three years ago, right at the start of Covid. She strongly dislikes most other cats, especially Chi, who bullied her a bit when she first got here, and she prefers to stay in my room with the door closed. The Maya part is just 'cause I've always really liked that name and it seemed to suit her, and the Miette part is because like the original Miette, she regularly sends me to jail for one THOUSAND years. Unlike the original Miette, however, she apparently has no problem with her body being kicked like the football, seeing as she still likes to sleep at my feet even though she is well aware of my tendency to thrash around in my sleep and has, unfortunately, been on the receiving end of that many times over, la pobrecita. No, instead she sends me to jail when I make her leave the room and share space with the wretched horde of feline and canine peasantry that infests the rest of the house, or worse, allowing one of them into her room!

Then there's Parker Peridot, the mother of the five kittens born in my back yard in April of 2021. She'd turned up not long before we found her babies, quickly winning us over with her hyper-affectionate ways and beautiful coloring. She's got sort of mixed Siamese/tabby markings, with her body being mostly pale cream with a sort of salt-and-pepper effect on her back, but her legs and head have dark stripes. This cat is so fucking smart, okay. So our backyard has an overhang that protects the lawnmower and the piles of scrap dad's collected for recycling, and leaning up against the wall was an old mattress frame. That's where she had her kittens, safe from hawks, and behind so many buckets of scrap that it would have been super difficult for any land-based predators to get to them. Even we had a hard time of it! But anyway, due to her cleverness, agility and sneakiness, her first name became Parker, and it was due to her loud, raspy voice, bossiness, and great big emotions that she is going to make your problem that she got the Peridot added to it. She loves all humans, is so desperate for attention that she'll chase the other animals away so that she can have it all, and she seems to consider us and the dogs to be her big, dumb, ugly children that she has to care for. She is the boss of everyone and she will not let you forget it.

Kipo Pixie-Paws was the first kitten I spotted when I followed Parker to her hidey-hole, and the one I most wanted to keep. She was a sort of sandy cream-colored spotted tabby, and the spots combined with my desire to name a cat after Kipo earned her her first name. The fact that she was basically the platonic ideal of a kitten in every way, like a real life version of Pixie from Pixie and Brutus, earned her the Pixie, and the -Paws part came from the fact that Kipo Pixie-Paws just flows better than Kipo Pixie. I adored her and she adored me, as well as basically everyone else. She was one of the few cats that Maya could tolerate, and she had the loudest purr of the litter, and she was the best athlete of the bunch, too. When it was snuggle time she would get so into it that she couldn't even be still. Unfortunately, when she was 11 months old she got into the sewing kit and swallowed a length of thread that tangled up inside her. Despite our best efforts to save her, she died in my arms a week later. I'm still not over it.

Her sister, a lovely silver tabby and the runt of the litter, ended up being saddled with the name Squeaktoy Sassafras Silkyshorts. The Squeaktoy part came from the way she'd scream every time you picked her up. Oddly enough, she now has the deepest meow of the litter. The Sassafras came from her being such a sassy little shit that my mom just started calling her Sassy, and so I incorporated it into her name in the form of Sassafras, which is such fun to say. Now, the Silkyshorts part came from how much she reminded me of my deceased cat Baron Reginald von Fluffytrousers the Third (and you had to say Third in your snootiest voice, preferably followed by an upper-crust snort). Her coat is silky-smooth however, so Fluffytrousers wouldn't have suited her at all, so I decided Silkyshorts would be a better fit. Also I just really like alliteration. She is the sweetest, friendliest cat in the house. She loves everyone and everything, and she is loved by all in turn, even Maya, which is saying something. She loves my mom best, however, and likes to sleep on her neck and drool into her ear all night.

Two of her brothers are classic Siamese colors, and one of them is a grey Siamese. I have always associated Siamese cats with Moogles for some reason, and so one of the twins started being called Moogle and the other wound up being Kupo. It wasn't long before I added Moonshine to the first one's name, making him Moogle Moonshine. Why? 'Cause it's fun to say. Also I would absolutely try moonshine made by a Moogle. Anywho. Moogle is one of the snuggliest cats ever, and his purr is nearly as loud as Kipo's was. When he was a kitten, he'd snuggle for hours and then all of a sudden it was murder time and he'd suddenly bite the shit out of you. Thankfully, his love bites have gotten much gentler since then. He's still an incredible snuggler, as well as a Certified Grade A Floppy Lad(TM). When he gets in my lap he lets me maneuver him however I need to and will purr the whole time. He's also fascinated with Maya and will often try to get me to let him in to pester her by crying at the door. He's got the most pitiful meow I've ever heard, like if you turned a sad Victorian orphan into a cat. It's almost impossible for me to resist, and yet every time I give in and let him in my room he immediately starts being a little pest and causing Maya to send me to jail for one thousand years. Like Chi, he produces his body weight in hair every day. I brush him almost every day and he still leaves so much hair behind on everything he touches. He's worth it, though.

Kupo, meanwhile, ended up being much, much bigger than his siblings, to the point where I started to wonder if his dad was a puma. It didn't take long for him to go from being just Kupo to being Big Bubba Kupo. He's a gentle giant and as sweet as they come, but he's also super skittish and has anxiety issues. This may be due to the fact that we temporarily found another home for him, but well, he went from our house, which had lots of other cats to play with and which almost always had at least one person at home, to a home with one other cat and an owner who was gone most of the day. I knew he wouldn't handle the change well and would probably have really bad separation anxiety and well, I was right, and he was back home within 6 months. Since then he's been very skittish, and it's taken us a long time to regain his trust. That said, he's still incredibly affectionate (at least until something startles him) and is always well-behaved when he's in my room.

Finally, the grey Siamese started with the name Buttercream, but it wasn't long before Dad added Bilbo Baggins to it, making him Bilbo Buttercream Baggins. Now, Kipo was a scamp. Squeaky is a pest. Moogle is a stinker, and Kupo is a goober, but Bilbo is a fucking menace. He loves dragging the water dishes around when he's bored and/or wants attention, usually resulting in a huge mess, which is why he's not allowed in my bedroom without heavy supervision. Not that it stops him from trying at every opportunity. Like Moogle, he also loves to annoy Maya, and he really loves knocking stuff over and instigating all manner of chaos among his siblings. That said, Bilbo is still a dynamite little cuddle buddy, as well as a certified Grade A Floppy Lad(TM) just like Moogle. He's also had a foot fetish since he was a kitten, and he loves to lay on peoples' feet and shoes. He also likes to take the catnip sock I made and drop it in the water, then wait a few minutes (I think he's making catnip tea?) and drag it back out to chew and/or lay upon it for a few hours. But I'll tell you what, even when he's being a real Bil-brat, he's still my little Bil-buddy, and I'll love that little Bil-bastard forever, 'cause he's the Bil-best! (I got a million of 'em! Ha-cha-cha-cha!)

So yeah, those are my cats. My two dogs are 12-year-old chihuahua/dachshund mixes whose mother was owned by a friend of ours. Mom and I were there when they were born, and when one puppy's head was too big for the birthing canal, she managed to save his life by adapting some of her paramedic tricks to save him. Still, he was oxygen-deprived for long enough that it caused a little bit of brain damage, but that's okay because he's a sweet baby boy and a good dog. His name is Pippin Moon Moon Hellhound, and he's made of love and anxiety. He wants nothing more than to be a good dog, but he just never seems to believe me when I call him one.

His brother Jig was two puppies behind him, and he has just never forgiven Pip for holding up progress. His full name is Jig the White Devil Hellhound, and he is the Ren to Pippin's Stimpy. Jig came from Jim C. Hines' Jig the Goblin series, because he is a little goblin child and always has been. The White Devil came about due to his tendency to snarl and bite at Pippin when he's frustrated. Also, look. Jig can be sitting in your lap, wagging his tail with all his might, licking your face and squirming to get closer like he's trying to fuse with you and giving you the most adoring looks, all the while snarling like a little demon. And then as soon as you're done petting him he'll jump down and go bite Pippin. Every time something pisses him off or scares him, he goes and bites Pippin, and Pippin just sighs and puts up with it even though he could kick Jig's ass if he tried, pobrecito.

Anyway, those are my critters. Again, sorry for the tl;dr, except. Y'know. Not really. Been meaning to write this shit down anyway. But for real, if you read this to the end, then I applaud your incredible patience.

Edited 2023-08-25 06:41 (UTC)

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #6075 ]

Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Re: Inspired by #5.

Sorry for the tl;dr, except not really