fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #6732 ]

[ SECRET POST #6732 ]

⌈ Secret Post #6732 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[The Light in the Piazza]

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 17 secrets from Secret Submission Post #963..
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

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08. https://i.imgur.com/QNkCZrf.png

Sometimes I read a comment or a secret about people's experience at FS and it is like they are describing a whole different comm.

Like yeah, sometimes (often) people will nitpick a secret or take (what feels like) a really negative bad faith take, but more often I see people agreeing or sharing similar felings or stories.

Like those anons a bit ago that said the comm is full of hate and peole who just want to attack and argue. I see that some days but mostly I am just here chatting with other anons and occasionally named users (bless you named users, I keep saying I should get an account just for this comm bit alas, I am lazy).

This. There are a small group of active trolls right now that are randomly negative. But mostly this place is really friendly and nice.

Ugh the days the anon hate trolls come out are the days I close the tab and move on. It is a shame because I look forward to the post each day, but I just don't need that hate and frustration in my limited fun spaces.

SA - the hilarity of me commenting disagreeing with you that not all comments are people disagreeing with secrets is not lost on me.

The comments confirm OP's opinion ngl.

If you view more than one person simply disagreeing calmly as some kind of communal desperation to prove every OP of every secret wrong, idk, that's a weird thing to think.

It's also conveniently ignoring every other secret thread on this post that has people agreeing with the OPs, even the ones that say they dislike popular stuff, like the musical one.

Not trying to be mean, but I don't really understand this sentiment. Lots of people can genuinely not agree with you, and your opinion can genuinely not be popular with a group of people, without it being some kind of coordinated effort to be contrary.

There's a weird sense of OP refusing to believe that their opinions can't possibly be this unpopular for real when... they sure can be, depending on the opinion and the crowd? Idk

Oops, I mean "refusing to believe that their opinions could* possibly be this unpopular"

DA
Also OP is giving this vibe that disagreement is automatically bad. Like sometimes that is just how conversations work - people voicing different opionions and talking about those differences. Disagreement is not always an argument or trolling or something.

Yeah idk. I've said some things on here that multiple people have disagreed with and well they're entitled to their opinion like I am to mine. It's interesting to get other people's perspectives even if I don't agree. If they're very vehement about it I don't bother to debate them because I'm not very concerned with changing anybody's mind. lol

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2025-06-12 00:36 (UTC) - Expand

This isn’t really my experience, but I might still understand some of what you’re saying. (If you do feel like linking to one or two of your old secrets here, I’d love to see more specifically what kind of comments you’re dealing with.)

I get that only getting disagreement in the comments can be really disappointing. (Or at least I get disappointed, but then figure I should have expected that, there is a reason it’s a secret after all.)

I also think you get more repetitive comments here than in some other online places because there’s not an inbuilt way to agree/like/vote without making your own comment. And that can feel like piling on.

I get you. This is such a small community now, and my tastes and opinions are so different from what I see in the majority of comments that I don't see the point in contributing to secret-making because it will either be a wall of "you sicko" or crickets.

But occasionally a secret will rec (or bash) something that's right up my alley, and I find new stuff to enjoy.

Particular thanks to the secret-maker who recced the Wideacre trilogy. I marathoned the hell outta that, to the point my sleep schedule and vision suffered, and that hasn't happened in a hot minute.

Do you really get lots of “you sicko” type comments? I posted a secret that I really thought would draw those out and got only polite interest… a bit of “huh, makes sense” or “not my thing”. (Okay, maybe one “you need therapy”, but that got pushback from others.)

I wonder if I interpret things very differently from you or we are looking at different samples, showing up on different days.

I'm gonna test it with some secrets.

Re: da

iff_and_xor - 2025-06-12 01:32 (UTC) - Expand

Re: da

(Anonymous) - 2025-06-12 01:37 (UTC) - Expand

Re: da

(Anonymous) - 2025-06-12 01:41 (UTC) - Expand

Re: da

(Anonymous) - 2025-06-12 01:40 (UTC) - Expand

it will either be a wall of "you sicko" or crickets.

I've never seen a wall of "you sicko." Maybe one, which gets dog-piled quickly. I think you're either overestimating how much it happens or reading into other comments that don't actually say that.

Same. There's some cDrama fans but we like different shows. I still like seeing those secrets. For those who doesn't know, cdrama is Chinese TV series.

It's my understanding that most stuff is posted because it is spicy, disagreeable, or unpopular. Wholesome or more agreeable secrets, sure, can be posted but were never the norm.

The secret (ha ha ha) is that you've got to embrace that! We have these secrets for a reason, right? Because they're off-beat. Because they're controversial. Sure, this is by definition a community for people who have off-beat and controversial opinions, but it's still the case that those opinions are gonna invite some disagreement just by their nature.

Now, it's not cool when people are being dicks. But if people are disagreeing, or trying to get you to see another perspective, then that's just part and parcel of sharing how you feel. As nice as it is to have a bunch of people tell you that they agree, it's not fair to expect theirs to be the only thoughts that ever get shared.

Expecting Fandom!Secrets to have a consensus agreement on more than a few secrets seems like an exercise in disappointment to me. And not even because it is a secret posting community, but just because it's made up of individuals who might be into fandom, but don't necessarily have a lot of overlap in the media they like, the way they interact with fandom, or even how they perceive the world. Some people are trolls, and, yeah, that can be very annoying. However, some people are contrarians, some people just really like to play devil's advocate, and some just disagree with that particular secret, and I think all of those are real and valid reactions. Also, sometimes that way a secret is worded can be very important to how it is perceived.

From my experience YMMV.

Sometimes I get good engagement (to me, that's when I have at least one comment where there is agreement or sympathy or someone relaying their own experiences that I can find comfort knowing I'm not alone in my experiences). Other times I either get people trolling in the comments (disagreeing and making fun of the secret with needless cruelty) or people missing my point entirely. And then there are times where I get zero comments, and I either don't care or am a little sad.

Because I've sent a lot of secrets for years now, they don't phase me much no matter what the turnout is. I just have moments of "wtf?" when I get engagement that I wasn't expecting.

Some time last year I sent in a secret about the TV show Friends, and the comments on the secret missed the point entirely. I was a little sad that I didn't have any comments I could engage with (because I don't want to reply "that's not my point" to any of the comments), but I got over it.

A few weeks ago I sent in a secret that got no comments and I was expecting that, so I was just like "oh well, the secret is pretty!"

I've said something similar before in reply to a different secret, I think FS is what you make of it.
If you're focused on just ensuring that your opinions are the "correct" opinions and it riles you up when people won't give into your takes, then you're going to find this place hostile.
If you skip over the heated discourses and comment on the more general or nicer comment sections, you're going to find this place not that bad.

There have been trolls being trolls with their bad faith contrarian comments. Maybe there is someone genuinely writing their thoughts and it's just not what I find pleasant but such sorts of comments are par for the course.

Sometimes I engage, other times I don't. I do have a certain limit with how much I'm willing to engage though. Some people seem to get a thrill in their responses when I've hit a nerve or they think they've hit a nerve with me. And these days when I get that sort of energy I'm just like, "Well this isn't fun. Time to stop engaging."

One last thing, I don't think it's a good thing to expect people to enthusiastically agree with your secrets/opinions on FS. You're just setting yourself up to be disappointed or attract trolls with that attitude.

This comm is like any place where random people from different places gather. You'll find like minded people, but you'll also be around people you have little in common with. Know that everyone isn't for you and maybe keep engagement with some people short.

Hm... But the secrets have to be *secrets* in order to be posted here. Otherwise, they get sorted into the N!S bin and don't actually get displayed. Unless it's something innocuous that you just can't say publicly because it involves your friendship circle (e.g. "My friend wrote a really good fic that got no attention, so I logged out and commented on it three times anon to make them feel like it had found its audience" or whatever), most secrets are going to be controversial things that someone doesn't want to post publicly under their own name. So they do tend to be confessional and something people wouldn't normally own up to.

Not all of those things necessarily start fights here (some of them are things that people DO tend to agree with but is an "inside thought" that they wouldn't say out loud -- e.g. "I get why people like reader fic but I always mute authors who post them -- I find them unbelievably cringe!"), but for many secrets, the reason why people feel the need to post them here is because they ARE fight-starters and people know that (e.g. you've got a character-bashing opinion of the fandom fave; they have an out-there headcanon other people strongly disagree with, etc.), hence why they are taking the opinion to this community.

People always complain about getting rude on FS comments for their opinions/secrets, but never specify what they're about... Makes it hard to sympathize.

I don't think it's "people." More like one person. Maybe two? They're always on about FS being mean or horrible people and accusing all of us of being "rude to everybody" but everyone else can see that's factually untrue.

All it really says is that they don't care about other people's threads. Only their own matter. Other people being nice to each other is irrelevant; OP is the main character and if we don't support OP then we're nasty people that love to be negative and we're the problem, even if, quite literally, every other thread today is positive.

It makes no sense, but it's that or believe that maybe they themselves are the problem and they don't seem the type that's open to that idea.

AYRT [and whoops, I didn't notice the huge typos in my post until after I sent it. TBF it was very early in the morning, heh.]

"I don't think it's "people." More like one person. Maybe two?"

I'm willing to bet it's a small handful of different people, or at least 2 or 3 persistent people who constantly mope about how F!S is an "echo chamber" that claims every desisting opinion is trolling or bait, unlike "the good old days" or whatever. I always try to ask these anons how were the old days different and what opinions/secrets they post that cause such backlash and I get no answer. I can't help but to assume it's purposely inflammatory type stuff, since I see polite disagreement all the time on other subjects and fandoms. There's always a specific anon with a pet issue that comes up, but there's always more people telling them to shut up.

"All it really says is that they don't care about other people's threads. Only their own matter. Other people being nice to each other is irrelevant; OP is the main character and if we don't support OP then we're nasty people that love to be negative and we're the problem, even if, quite literally, every other thread today is positive."

Yep, exactly. I've submitted some secrets that were strange or unpopular opinions, and the worst that happened is it got no comments because the fandom itself was too obscure.

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