[ SECRET POST #6746 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6746 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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[Gargoyles]



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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 13 secrets from Secret Submission Post #965.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: “Red flag” recommendations

[(Anonymous)]

I've never judged anyone for their book recs. It seems weird to me to write off a person just because of what books they're enthusiastic about. I mean FFS I'm a fandom person. I understand being fannish about things that are icky or not good.

Re: “Red flag” recommendations

[iff_and_xor]

I asked because I think recommendations can be a bit different than just what someone is enthusiastic about.

If someone recommends me things that are too off base, I may think they’re not a reliable source of recommendations because our tastes are too different.

And I’ve had people recommend me things that made me reevaluate how they saw me, sometimes in negative ways.

Re: “Red flag” recommendations

[(Anonymous)]

This isn’t about fandom though, it’s about people recommending things to other people. And that’s a way of determining social compatibility. And for people who read or watch a lot of stuff, the quality of what’s being recced says a lot about the person giving the rec.

And as iff said, it is also telling about how that person sees you. For example, my mother always told everyone I like to read so for birthdays and Christmas I’d get the absolute worst books because they were heavily promoted. Da Vinci Code and NYT Bestsellers and Oprah Book Club stuff. It’s fine for people to read and like that stuff, but anyone recommending it to me isn’t someone I have enough in common with to willingly associate with them. There are also people who blindly recommend things based on their own interests without any thought about the other person. That’s really immature and selfish and again, someone I don’t want to be around.

Re: “Red flag” recommendations

[(Anonymous)]

I get on fine with people who enjoy different media. My partner of many years likes some things I don't like and vice versa. Maybe that's a me thing.

I have found that judgey people don't like me very much lol. So I don't really talk about media IRL with casual acquaintances.

Re: “Red flag” recommendations

[iff_and_xor]

The question is whether you get on fine with people who recommend you media that is clearly against your tastes as they would be aware of them (or as you’d hope they’d be aware of them).

Re: “Red flag” recommendations

[(Anonymous)]

I get that, and I apologize for letting my emotions get away from me due to other anons. Your conversation starter was worded diplomatically (more than the secret), and I appreciate people (especially named users) keeping GCs alive. And goodness, it must be upsetting indeed to have someone rec something to you that feels like a personal insult.

We get secrets from time to time that amount to "if you like XYZ, I judge you and could never get along with you." Which is how the secret struck me, and that's a strange way of thinking to me. E.g. the other anon who replied to me likening media tastes to social compatibility. Or those here basically amounting an appreciation for Fight Club to utter deviance that calls for immediate dismissal of the person as likeable in any way. It wasn't your post that got under my skin, more the comments. Again, I apologize if that felt like an attack on you or your post. I understand your POV.

Re: “Red flag” recommendations

[(Anonymous)]

I would hazard a guess that people who don’t get along with you are more frustrated by inability to comprehend clear language than concerned with what media you enjoy.