[ SECRET POST #6981 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #6981 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 31 secrets from Secret Submission Post #997.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Secret OP

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT
Thinking at work, I realized I never was part of a group that doxxed people for having differing opinions. My toxic friendships had way less on the line.
And I myself got a taste of the "let me shame you for not being as pure/good/altruistic/smart as me" snide remarks throughout the years.

My experiences are different, I see.
But I do understand what it's like to be in group where I feel like I have to be ultra careful because any misstep can make being on socials/in fandom a relentless barrage of bullying.

But I do wish you the best. I hope you can find your tribe, people you can feel safe with. I never really felt like I had real friends (both IRL and in fandom), but in recent years, old friends and new have appeared in my life and slowly year by year my community of friends has grown.

Just hope you know that if you feel like the vibes are off with your friend group, it's perfectly fine for you dip out without explaining. It can be hard to see friends who used to pass such harsh criticism on others now shrug that stuff off as "Oh what a silly thing that was". When that "silly thing" bullied me into silence and worsened my trust issues. I can't even imagine what it was like to have friends who went so far as to dox, harass, etc. =/
You deserve to have friends who you feel safe around.

Also LOL I don't do social media anymore because I also found people up to some wild nonsense online too much. One of my friends was in a popular tv show fandom, and the ship wars at one point got low enough that people got doxxed, hacked, a lot of messed up stuff. That was enough to remind me that social media as it is now is too dangerous for me to have fun.
Posting anon on FS is sorta the only place I do any real commenting and fandom talking.
*sorry if my reply is rambling and all over the place, going to bed late*

Re: Secret OP

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT
These friends weren't social-media related, it was more of a private group I was in. I was invited into it and we truly did vibe for the first year or so. I struggle with making friends since early childhood and have struggled with staying in toxic situations because loneliness is unbearable. I stayed "friends" with a real life abuser for a few years as a teen for this reason. I work a lot IRL and thus have less time for socializing, but I just go to real events and bars when I can. I just don't know how to make connections "stick".

FS is okay for blowing off steam or confessing, well, fandom secrets, but I find it to be equally bad if not worse than social media due to the anons. Like, my secret already got a bitchy comment, but on social media people leave me alone. But I'm not super "into" social media or use it for making friends, I don't use it for discourse or other things that people complain about attracting drama over. All of my interpersonal conflicts happened in private. *shrug*