[ SECRET POST #7026 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #7026 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 12 secrets from Secret Submission Post #1003.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Non-fandom arguments.

[(Anonymous)]

I don't know if it's me getting older or what, but getting into an argument just leaves me stressed and on edge now even if I know I'm right, or even after it's over. My last big argument was about boundaries with a parent, where I refused to answer questions about a personal matter. (And the reason why I refuse to answer questions is because this parent is very judgmental and likes to weaponize information.) The parent pushed and pushed and pushed until I snapped at them, and then of course, they made ME out to be the bad guy. I'm still struggling to not hate their guts and not cut them out of my life forever. It's not that they're irredeemably awful, it's just I just don't want to deal with them anymore.

The second argument was over some fact-based thing. Basically a friend and I are working on a group project and friend says that X thing was a historical fact, and I can point to credible sources that say no, it wasn't. But the friend insists that they did their research and they're sure that X was a fact. I just gave up because... whatever, right? But I'm still stressed about it. It does involve me, I don't want to look like a lazy person who doesn't research stuff! But it's not like it'll make a huge difference in the long run. I just hate it when people aren't sensible.

Re: Non-fandom arguments.

[(Anonymous)]

No, life is too short for stupid fucking bullshit. I know you aren't asking for advice, but next time I'd suggest that, before it gets to the "snap at the person who is deliberately needling you" point, say that you're going to leave/hang up the phone if they don't stop talking about the thing. And if the next thing out of their mouth is the thing you told them you were going to leave/hang up over.... then leave/hang up without guilt. Don't keep arguing, let them think about it (or not think about it). It's their problem, not yours.

(Granted, I know some folks might have an unfortunate living situation with the boundary-crosser. If that's the case, perhaps leave the room or take a walk.)

Working on a group project though? Assuming you're going to present it? I do think the presenters have a huge obligation to be factual (or as factual as possible). Sources ought to be doublechecked and triplechecked. There's enough misinformation in the world.