[ SECRET POST #7043 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #7043 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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[Pokemon go]



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05.
[The Amazing Digital Circus]



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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 40 secrets from Secret Submission Post #1006.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: I made myself sad.

[(Anonymous)]

I feel that. That's largely how I grew up too, emotionally immature parent who couldn't deal with life and only loved kids when they were cute and well behaved and not anything demanding actual parental responsibility. I've had the experience of trying new things ruined so many times because I had the audacity to not be an automatic genius at something I knew nothing about. I was also mocked for not knowing things they never bothered to teach me. I'm pretty sure they're the reason I have a history of raging when I mess up at hobbies, due to not being allowed to make mistakes (I've gotten more aware of this and am trying to get better at it, which is difficult when I can't tell the difference between that and menopause). Add in isolation because they didn't like it when I had friends either.

And it would have made all the difference in the world if just one mature, caring, responsible adult had seen me and let me know they had my back. I might have a circle I feel safe in now, a better career, maybe I'd be someplace completely different.

Re: I made myself sad.

[(Anonymous)]

With my parents, they loved me "in their own way", but they had very unrealistic expectations of me and little desire to actually teach or help me meet those expectations. So being mocked because I didn't know how to play sports (and neither of my parents are into sports or are particularly athletic) was my normal. To this day, my dad still likes to remind me (and everyone else within hearing range) that I used to be a total ignoramus in the kitchen and couldn't even boil water. He's referring to when I was in middle school/high school, and nobody had ever taught me how to cook. That was 20+ years ago and I'm a very a good cook now (and I taught myself), but of course he doesn't compliment me or mention that part because it's not fun for him to be proud of my accomplishments. It's only fun for him if he can dwell upon and make fun of my failures. And then he wonders why we're not close and why I don't call my parents for a nice chit-chat like other peoples' kids he knows of.

I'm still struggling to try new things and attempt difficult stuff because I'm crippled by fear of failure. It helps that nobody is actually hovering at my shoulder waiting to belittle me or ground me for not being expert level at everything. But I still find myself reluctant to pursue new hobbies or set challenging goals for myself because of this nagging anxiety and fear. Even though I know where it comes from, it's still hard to overcome it.

Re: I made myself sad.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm so sorry your dad treated you that way. It also makes no sense whatsoever because...literally everyone starts off not knowing how to do anything in the kitchen. No one is born knowing how to cook. They have to be taught, teach themselves, observe, etc. EVERYONE starts off with no cooking skills. It sounds like he has a really, really immature, childish mindset.

Re: I made myself sad.

[(Anonymous)]

He does, yes. And he's got absolutely no shame about acting like a hypocrite and mocking people for not knowing things that he also doesn't know. As an adult, it's become painfully clear to me that he enjoys feeling superior and in control, and it's not enough for him to be proud of his own accomplishments (he does have them), he's also got to put other people down.

Because did I mention he himself cannot cook? Yep. But it was somehow shameful for a 15 year old girl to not know how to make a full dinner. There's probably a sexist element to that, because my brother was never mocked for not knowing how to cook.