fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1472 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1472 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 067 secrets from Secret Submission Post #210.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

So you truly believe that me not coming out and saying I like slash, labeling myself as a gay person in a town that's harshly anti-gay, is because of "my insecurities" and not fear of my safety?

Dude. I'm not insecure at all, but you really have to realize not everyone is in the same situation and there are IRL consequences for things sometimes. Even fandom things. :\

Well, I feel silly. Obviously my meaning was unclear, and I should've looked closer at my words.

What you're saying isn't the kind of situation I was referring to. Rather, I was talking about seemingly innocuous statements like, "I like/don't character X" that cause all manner of ridiculous responses when it's really not that big a deal. So what if that person has a different opinion than you? Not everyone is going to agree with what you think about something. I think my complaint stems more from the idea that the internet makes it so easy to put people down for what they think without any sort of consequence.

Sorry if I offended you. Going back and rereading it, it DOES seem pretty knee-jerk, and I'll be honest when I say that I come from "Tolerance Narnia," as one person above put it. I've never had much trouble along those lines, and what trouble I've experienced I've written off as the closed minded ramblings of fools. Anyway, does this make any more sense?

I'd agree with you that a lot of the things here aren't things I'd keep a secret, but I dunno, who am I to say? There have been epic wank wars over relatively minor things, and there are lots of things I don't tell my fandom friends - not because they'd flip out, but because they don't care, or I feel it's silly, or feel like I should be more mature than that etc.

Haha, don't worry, I wasn't offended so much as kind of WTF at the wording but you've cleared that up, so. :)

I was hoping that was what you meant because I felt kind of silly after reading a lot of the comments ;._.

I don't know, perhaps I'm projecting my own viewpoint onto others' secrets, but I've never assumed that all "I like/don't like this" secrets are secrets in the "I'd be ashamed to have people know I think this" sense, or are things that the OP is insecure about. I see it as being more about camaraderie. For example, maybe some of the people who hate a certain character just don't feel right coming across as negative when their friends are squeeing about said character, but they still want to express their opinion and see if anyone agrees.

I posted a secret ages ago that was just something kind of embarrassing from when I was younger. I wasn't insecure about it. I thought it was kind of funny, if somewhat embarrassing, and thought it made a neat secret. I didn't need validation by any means, but it still made me smile when I got comments of "Me too, OP!" It wasn't about shame, it was about fun.

For my part, I see the word secret and assume there is a reason for the secret, and being ashamed is the thing that most readily jumps to mind. When people keep secrets, it's generally because they don't want others to know, so, when I see secrets like that, I think, "why are you ashamed of that?" Obviously, that isn't always the case, and my logic is somewhat flawed.

Firstly, you have to remember that just secret does not always equal shame. There are many reasons for keeping something secret.

Secondly, after reading all of this thread, I have to say I'm pretty impressed with your reaction. You had a lot of people reacting very negatively and you came in here, fessed up, and had a mature conversation with people. And you admitted your wrong. Not something you see everyday on F!S, or LJ in general really.

[ SECRET POST #1472 ]

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