[ SECRET POST #1555 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1555 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


__________________________________________________



02.


__________________________________________________



03.


__________________________________________________



04.


__________________________________________________



05.


__________________________________________________



06.


__________________________________________________



07.


__________________________________________________



08.


__________________________________________________



09.


__________________________________________________



10.


__________________________________________________



11.


__________________________________________________



12.


__________________________________________________



13.


__________________________________________________



14.


__________________________________________________



15.


__________________________________________________



16.


__________________________________________________



17.


__________________________________________________



18.


__________________________________________________



19.


__________________________________________________



20.


__________________________________________________



21.


__________________________________________________



22.


__________________________________________________



23.


__________________________________________________



24.


__________________________________________________



25.


__________________________________________________



26.


__________________________________________________



27.


__________________________________________________



28.


__________________________________________________



29.


__________________________________________________



30.


__________________________________________________



31.


__________________________________________________



32.


__________________________________________________



33.


__________________________________________________



34.


__________________________________________________



35.



Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 076 secrets from Secret Submission Post #222.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 3 4 5 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ], [ 1 - unreadable ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

There are a couple things bothering me about this, one calling your friend a fag and two calling yourself a hag.

In my experience, people who want to be "faghags" often fall in love with their gay friends, because for some reason they find gay men appealing. I don't know what the psychology of it is but it's offensive.

It's offensive to gay men to treat them as objects that way and project all your desires onto them.

And it's offensive to women to call yourself a hag that has nothing better to do then be stepped on by someone who will never have an interest in you.

So please, figure out what attracts you to gay men in the first place (do you have low self esteem and only go for guys you can't have?), drop the term fag hag, and just go for a nice platonic friendship the next time you meet a nice gay guy.

[(Anonymous)]

people who want to be "faghags" often fall in love with their gay friends

Indeed. If you weren't already objectifying or fetishizing gay men, you wouldn't use such an inappropriate label that insults both you and him/them. Perhaps in the past, it was more acceptable, but now that term has an underlying connotation for many people (not all) that the relationship is not so much a friendship as it is a...codependent, pseudoromantic, delusional-on-at-least-one-person's-part couple.

I've fallen for plenty of straight men I shouldn't have (no gay ones - at least not out ones). A lot of times it involved bad choices I made and ways I approached the relationship. Being so willing to embrace the label "fag hag" - and acting like you don't realize exactly what you were doing when you did that (please, most "fag hags" fall for the guys in question because that was their intention or motivation all along) - suggests to me you need to reevaluate your own behavior and attitudes about this friendship from day one.

[(Anonymous)]

I think it becomes almost inevitable when the label is impressed in that way, all the women I know who have called themselves "fag hags" often start by saying, "Oh, I LOVE gay men." and then the next time you encounter them they've fallen in love with a gay man.

And it just... never ends well. Both parties end up getting hurt and something that could have been a valued friendship is lost for good. As much as you can say "Well, that's life." it's still something that could possibly be avoided if the problem is how someone is viewing gay men in general in their mind.

It's okay to be attracted to someone you'll never have but once you know you won't have them it's good to create barriers just to protect yourself if for no other reason.

[rightclick5ave.livejournal.com]

it might be an offensive term to most, but a gay friend of mine calls his straight female friends "fag hags" and straight male friends "fag stags". I guess it's a reclaiming-the-term kinda thing?

[(Anonymous)]

You can't really reclaim a term though that is not completely yours to reclaim, it's still offensive to call women "hags" without their permission and you'll find that not all women would find being called a "fag had" endearing.

[rightclick5ave.livejournal.com]

mm yes, I agree with that. what I'm saying is that he uses these terms in an endearing manner, and he and his friends don't use them in a disparaging or offensive way.