[ SECRET POST #1562 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1562 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

oh god stop using red text on jpegs

also, now affiliated with pkmnsecret! Check em out if you're interested. (:

Secrets Left to Post: 05 pages, 109 secrets from Secret Submission Post #223.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[citrinesunset.livejournal.com]

Honestly, I think it depends. There are different types of BDSM relationships, and ultimately, I tend to look at them in terms of whether they're fulfilling and good whether than if they're enjoyable. Because honestly, there may be times when something isn't "enjoyable" in a strict sense.

A lot of people (like me) are more into roleplay and the sadism/masochism and bondage/discipline aspects of BDSM, and in those situations, yes, getting off and enjoying yourself are big motivators. But I'm also not submissive.

Other people are more interested in the dominance/submission aspect of BDSM, and for some submissive people, the fulfillment is less about sexual pleasure than it is about being in a relationship where they can serve and submit to their dominant partner. And that's where "enjoyment" can get tricky, because for some people, submitting means doing more than just the particular things that get them off. For example, maybe the sub doesn't like doing dishes. But if their dom tells them to do them, they might not want to be "able" to say, "I hate doing the dishes. Why don't you do them and I'll vacuum, instead?" Maintaining the dominant and submissive roles in the relationship may be more important to them than enjoying everything their dom has them do. So the key becomes building a relationship where their desires and limits match up enough so that they can both be happy and have fun while also having those roles in place.