I am not saying that anyone has the right to not be upset. I am saying that if someone says "I am upset by this", there are much better ways to deal with that then to tell them to gdiaf for being judgmental, which is almost always the immediate response. Fandom is often in a public (well, internet public) space, and everyone is eventually going to come across something they don't like. This could be an opportunity for discussion, but it generally turns into a "let's shame the people who don't like our kink" fest. Saying "I understand you have issues, but I happen to enjoy this" should not be that hard.