[ SECRET POST #1691 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1691 ⌋


Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 13 pages, 314 secrets from Secret Submission Post #242.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 2 3 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 1 - repeats ]
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments and concerns should go here.

Comments

[nohara-megami.livejournal.com]

Actually, I do know couples who talk about it. Most of my married friends did, as did I, when they decided to tie the knot. It's something that does need to be addressed at one point since if you choose to change or alter it, you have to deal with the pain in the butt process of getting it legally changed. It's not something you just walk into to without thinking, there's too much paperwork to deal with to do that mindlessly.

And what makes a character 'more prone to keep or hyphenate'? Just because Hermione decided to take the Weasley name doesn't mean she has a less firm stance on the equality for others. Maybe she wanted to take the name? Maybe she liked it? Doesn't mean that there wasn't thought involved, I doubt anyone was holding a gun to her head.

In the past I won't argue that it was expected, demanded even, that a woman takes her husband's name. Anthropologically speaking, it does denote a sense of ownership in a marriage that by carrying the name it means you are in a sense property but we're in the 21st century now. There are couples out there that keep their names and live happily with that. There are others who want to have the same last name and choose to do so. Yes, there are no doubt others out there who do it out of a sense of feeling that society will demand of it them but that is their own choice.

[meran-flash.livejournal.com]

you have to deal with the pain in the butt process of getting it legally changed. It's not something you just walk into to without thinking, there's too much paperwork to deal with to do that mindlessly.

Actually, in America, the process of changing your last name is enormously more easy for women than it is for men. We call that an institutionalized incentive.

Yes, there are no doubt others out there who do it out of a sense of feeling that society will demand of it them but that is their own choice.

lol @ "I choose my choice."

[nohara-megami.livejournal.com]

I know you have to petition the court for a name change if you aren't getting married/divorced, at least in my state, but I wouldn't call that institutionalized incentive. You have the same amount of steps either way, no one way is easier.

If you want to follow the lemmings off the cliff, you are still technically making the conscious decision to do so! Free will, gotta love humanity.

[(Anonymous)]

Wait, what? You know you are not refuting her point, right?

[ncc-gqmf.livejournal.com]

Nope -- as someone who's looked into this quite a bit, it really is far easier for a married woman to change her last name than it is for anyone else to change their name for any other reason.

[lady-lilith.livejournal.com]

It's free for a married woman to change her name. It cost me hundreds to drop my birth last name because I wasn't getting married. Oh it's much easier for a married woman to do it.

[(Anonymous)]

God, you really are an obnoxious piece of shit, aren't you?

[(Anonymous)]

lol are facts obnoxious to you?

[(Anonymous)]

Saying "it is simpler for a woman to change her last name than it is for a man" is a fact.

Saying "that's called institutionalized incentive" is tinfoil-hat feminism. Everything's a huge fucking conspiracy meant to keep wimmens in the kitchen. Whatevs.

[(Anonymous)]

(SA, capitalization changing as I'm on my phone and it autocaps)

I don't doubt that you know such women and they exist. but I wouldn't say that it's COMMON yet. most married women I know have simply taken their husband's names because that's what's expected and easiest-- no real thought or discussion.

the problem is we have no insight to hermione's motivation and we certainly can't ask her. so yes, when you have women who would have reason to keep or hyphenate their names, instead take their husband's name, and EVERY SINGLE WOMAN in the ENTIRE SERIES takes her husband's name, that doesn't come off as "each couple had a thoughtful discussion and all came to the exact same conclusion." it comes off as simply following convention.

ohhh it's the 21st century! all problems of sexism/heteropatriarchy are nearly solved.

[nohara-megami.livejournal.com]

You're right, it's not a common practice everywhere. I'd hate to feel that I would have to change my name for the sake of convention but to each their own.

I do admit that it is odd that no one kept their own names in the series. Personally I believe that was a decision on the part of the author rather than the overall example that no one in that universe would choose any differently. Maybe JKR didn't want to go that deep into the thought of the tradition of name changing, it is a kids series after all.

Yeah, not so much obviously. But as a society, in many places, since it is indeed 2011 and not 1911 we have the ability to not follow convention. Of course, not all will use the tools available and just go with that they assume need to be done to fit in. But keeping your maiden name doesn't mean your destroying sexism or helping the battle, making the decision for yourself and talking it over does help keep the proactive thinking going.

[(Anonymous)]

well, but we always make inferences based on what the author chooses to show. i'd like to THINK that some women keep their names or hyphenate but there is no canon basis for that in books. also, "it's a kids book" isn't really a good reason for that, because harry potter touches on all KINDS of complicated/touchy subjects that other kids' books many times don't (uhhh racist genocide??) and it's not like you have to explain any tradition just to show someone who's married keeping her name

no one's saying that keeping your name = authomatic death blow to sexism, that's silly. but while keeping your name may not necessarily fight back against sexism (altho, i think even if it's not your intention, it certainly helps just by showing an alternative), thoughtlessly going with tradition just because it's tradition definitely helps perpetuate it.