fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1815 ]

[ SECRET POST #1815 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1815 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

__________________________________________________

03.

__________________________________________________

04.

__________________________________________________

05.

__________________________________________________

06.

__________________________________________________

07.

__________________________________________________

08.

__________________________________________________

09. [ TRIGGER WARNING for self-harm/cutting ]

__________________________________________________

10.

__________________________________________________

11.

__________________________________________________

12.

__________________________________________________

13.

__________________________________________________

14.

__________________________________________________

15.

__________________________________________________

16.

__________________________________________________

17.

__________________________________________________

18.

__________________________________________________

19.

__________________________________________________

20.

__________________________________________________

21.

__________________________________________________

22.

__________________________________________________

23.

__________________________________________________

24.

__________________________________________________

25.

__________________________________________________

26.

__________________________________________________

27.

__________________________________________________

28.

__________________________________________________

29.

__________________________________________________

30.

__________________________________________________

31.

__________________________________________________

32.

__________________________________________________

33.

__________________________________________________

34.

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 41 secrets from Secret Submission Post #259.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 1 2 - repeats ]
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

17. http://i39.tinypic.com/5048le.png

This is a nice secret!
A lot of people grow up echoing their parents points of view, good on you OP for expanding your view!

I can relate to this somewhat - I grew up not really questioning some of my parents' racist or homophobic views, as most children do, and it was only when I spent more time online on forums and fandom that I started to look at those opinions properly. (There are still many things that I'm unsure about but the internet is a great place to start my research!)

So yeah, good for you that you've grown in a good way. Anyway, I don't think - or at least, I hope - that people will judge you for views you USED to hold.

Thank you for being able to see past what your parents taught you <3.

I would have been surprised if your views weren't similar to your parents' at least until a certain point: one's parents are often a great presence in life, and it happens often that without anything or anyone expanding one's view their children will end up thinking the same way.

For example, I was schooled by nuns, and until I was... man, thirteen or something, I thought sex wrong if it wasn't meant to have kids. Yeah. If people who know me now were to know I used to think that, they just wouldn't believe it. XD
Sometimes I feel a tad embarrassed of myself for being so narrow-minded when I was younger, but what matters is that I could get past the point of view I was forced into, and it's the same with you. Internet can be great on this aspect - it allows even people who otherwise would never meet to talk and exchange opinions. I actually think it's no coincidence that I began questioning such strict views around the same time we got dial-up and I could start surfing the net. XD

Edited 2011-12-23 01:12 (UTC)

good for you, OP. All kinds of people live their whole lives never ever questioning the veracity of what they were taught. You've actually grown as a person. Rock on

When I first got into fandom I was religious and thought homosexuality was wrong. I didn't talk about it except to very close friends, and then only to tell them how conflicted I was over it.

Eventually I got over the whole thing, but I still worry people will find out and dislike me for it even though I'm so much the opposite now.

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2011-12-23 03:02 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2011-12-23 11:44 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2011-12-23 11:48 (UTC) - Expand

Be proud of yourself, OP! Way too many people don't question what they're taught, or worse, they can't imagine being possibly wrong even when confronted with evidence. Not your fault you were brought up a certain way, and accepted what your parents told you -- people are the result of their surroundings, after all; still, when you saw a crack in that, you didn't try to mend it, but were able to make it into a chance to better yourself. So don't dwell too much over it; what's important is the kind of person you become, rather than the one you started as.

Yay for you starting be develop your own views!

And I mean that in a 100% honest, non snarky way. It can be very hard to overcome the hatred & prejudice you've grown up with. Be proud of yourself for refusing to just keep following what your family want you to think =)

Ah Tumblr is great for this, it really helped me expand my mind and learn how to treat members of the LGBT community respectfully.
(I was never homophobic due to my Godmother having a lovely girlfriend, but didn't know much about bisexuality and nothing about transgender people and their rights)

My parents always taught me that homosexuality was perfectly fine and that there's no real difference between people of different races (and I'm incredibly grateful they did), so I have no idea what it's like to be in your shoes. I've always thought it must be incredibly difficult to get past your parents teaching you things like that, so I have tremendous admiration for anyone who manages it. The fact that when confronted with contradictions to what you were taught you opened your mind and reconsidered tells me so much more about you as a person than the fact you were taught such hateful stuff in the first place.

I hope your internet friends would feel similarly to me if they knew. As long as you continue to question yourself and your presumptions, and to accept people for who they are, I don't think you should feel ashamed at all.

People like you make me happy. Little by little, person by person, the culture that produced your parents is eroding away forever.

I'm just curious how you didn't realize Zach was gay BEFORE he came out. It was... pretty obvious. I guess maybe it was willful ignorance?

(no subject)

hiyami.livejournal.com - 2011-12-23 14:16 (UTC) - Expand

That's really great that you allowed yourself to change your views. That's genuinely smart, so props, OP.

I love the way he came out, too, not just like on the cover of People or some shit - it wasn't a Deal at all and grrr I <3 him so

I'm happy for you and I'm really happy for everyone else whose world is better for your realization, myself included. :)

This is why we keep talking to people. :-) Good for you for expanding your horizons, OP!

I needed to hear this today. Thank you.

This is wonderful to hear, anon! No one in my family ever made a big deal about homosexuality. I knew my mom had a male cousin who liked men, but no one seemed to care so I didn't care. Too often, people don't escape their bigoted upbringing and the cycle of hate continues. I always love hearing stories like yours.

Good for you! I know that going against years of training and your parents' beliefs can be difficult, so congratulations!

This is awesome, OP, you should be proud. I have a very religious, homophobic, and borderline racist mother, so I know what it's like to be around the sort of talk you must have grown up with. I've had to learn what sort of things to never bring up because I know it will only end in a shouting match.

It's things like this that give me so much hope for the future <3 Good on you for figuring out your own views, not just blindly following your parents.

*applauds* Good for you!

You are pretty much me in a different fandom. I am proud of you, OP, and I hope you have some real life support. Not having the same essential beliefs as your family members is hard; but you have to stick with what you know is right. I hope you can talk to your family civilly about your beliefs one day; I know for mine it might take many years, but it will be worth it.

Edited 2011-12-23 10:11 (UTC)

Good for you :)