Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2012-01-08 04:11 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2012-01-08 04:11 pm
[ SECRET POST #1832 ]
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 06 pages, 139 secrets from Secret Submission Post #262.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeats ]
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments and concerns should go here.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2012-01-08 10:10 pm (UTC)(link)no subject
(Anonymous) 2012-01-08 10:16 pm (UTC)(link)Look, I don't have a problem with OP making a sock account if they want to remain in that fandom.
I have a problem with people thinking other people need to grow "thicker skin" just because they aren't as hypothetically bothered by the same situation.
I have a problem with the commenters above being all blasé about this secret, like OP's pain is meaningless.
You should try empathy. I'll leave you to discover that concept.
no subject
My issue, here, is this:
Having a thick skin can be really nice, but I think it's pretty terrible to expect perfectly good, innocent people to have to put up with crap while other people get away with treating people badly.
Not saying everything should be fair-- we all know life isn't fair-- but I find the "go make a sock, leave the fandom, change your username" to insinuate that a.) the OP has to be the one to change, and b.) it's okay that these people are doing this, maybe if everyone had a thicker skin, douchebaggery wouldn't affect anyone. <--Untrue.
To the OP:
It's ridiculous that these people are treating you this way. I avoid big fandoms prooobably because of the BNF circles. Remember, a BNF is simply well-known; they can be just as big a BNF for good fic as bad as mediocre.
Constructive criticism in most fandoms is a good thing. I know I love to get it! Even if I don't agree with the criticism offered, I am pleased that someone looked closely enough at my story to even THINK of criticism to write in a more detailed tone than, "you missed a comma here".
I don't know what fandom you are in, OP, where this took place, but I sure wish I did. I would probably ignore the haters as best I could and stick to posting in a more private place-- like my own LJ, LJ comms, maybe if there is a fic website, et cetera.
I'm not saying you should hide from these bloody BNFs, but do what's right for you. I could never publish fanfiction under a sock account, ever. I want my work credited with my name-- anything else would make me sick. I'd rather not even post it online if I can't claim it as my own under my normal/usual pen-name.
Best of luck, OP.
no subject
I'm a very sensitive person. This isn't a good thing, and I DO need to grow a thicker skin. I completely acknowledge that. However... that doesn't mean that other people should me mean to me. That doesn't take the blame off of them. Just because I should stand up for myself doesn't mean that someone else should purposely push me down. Also, my sensitivity is what leads me to be more sensitive to other people. Honestly, in that situation, I'd rather be sensitive than be the toughest fucker around if it meant being mean to people (not that a person can't be thick-skinned and kind- I know people who are).
"Having a thick skin can be really nice, but I think it's pretty terrible to expect perfectly good, innocent people to have to put up with crap while other people get away with treating people badly."
This, absolutely this.
lol @ me making this all about me: OP, if you want to get a sock, go for it, but know that what these people have done to you is NOT okay, and you are NOT the one who needs to change. I'd like to say "fuck those people, who cares what they think", but, although it's true, that's way easier said than done. What other people say does have an affect on you, even if they're bullying jerks, which it sounds like they are. I hope things get better for you. If getting a sock helps and you want to do it, do it, but do it to make YOUR life easier and not because you have anything to apologize for.
no subject
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(Anonymous) 2012-01-08 10:30 pm (UTC)(link)You should try learning not to be so sensitive, I hear it works wonders.
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(Anonymous) 2012-01-08 10:36 pm (UTC)(link)Seriously???
Try learning not to be an ass.
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(Anonymous) 2012-01-08 10:46 pm (UTC)(link)no subject
(Anonymous) 2012-01-09 01:55 am (UTC)(link)no subject
(Anonymous) 2012-01-09 02:07 am (UTC)(link)no subject
Yes it's naive and it's good to not take jerk-ass-y comments on the internet to heart, but one can dream.
no subject