fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1907 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1907 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Disney's Gargoyles]

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[X-Men: First Class]

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[keanu reeves]

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[keanu reeves]

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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

11. [SPOILERS for Death Note]

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12. [SPOILERS for Kuragehime]

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13. [SPOILERS for The Walking Dead]

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14. [SPOILERS for Supernatural]

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15. [SPOILERS for Mass Effect 3]

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16. [SPOILERS for Mass Effect 3]

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17. [SPOILERS for Mass Effect 3]

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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

18. [TRIGGER WARNING for sexual abuse]

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19. [TRIGGER WARNING for rape]

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20. [TRIGGER WARNING for rape]

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #272.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - hit/ship/spiration ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I agree with you, but am curious. I label myself as asexual and see it as a sexual orientation (I am not sexually attracted to anyone), however have seen other people who identify as asexual include the "hetero" or "homo" asexual. Imo, I see the "hetero/etc" as the qualifier in this situation, but would you consider the "asexual" akin to "demisexual" as a qualifier?

I've always seen people use the hetero/homo/ect. asexual description to mean that they are not sexually attracted to either gender, but that they can only be romantically attracted - in a purely emotional sense - to people of a specific gender.

See, this was a short and concise explanation. Why can't I do that?

I see asexuality as a sexual orientation as well, as it means that you aren't sexually attracted to anyone period, no matter which gender.

Have you heard of "romantic orientation"? I think that is what you are describing, where the hetero/homo/etc. refers to the gender you find yourself romantically drawn to. Basically, if you're a bi(-romantic) asexual you are an asexual who finds themselves romantically drawn to both women and men.

I actually wrote my other comment by comparing "demisexual" to x-romantic, but the more I thought about it the more I came to the conclusion that I don't think the two are comparable. Because again, romantic orientation is about the gender/s you are drawn to, just that it's romantically rather than sexually in this case.

Personally, I think about it this way: There is the concept of the orientation, which is made up of both romantic orientation and sexual orientation. Now, disregarding that sexuality is fluid and that we're not all 0s, 1s, 3s, or 6s on the Kinsey Scale* we can safely say that for most sexuals, romantic orientation = sexual orienation. Which is why we don't say hetero-romantic heterosexual, but just heterosexual. It's just redundant.

Asexuals, on the other hand, need** this further qualifier to define themselves. Obviously, you don't need to feel sexually attracted to someone to fall in love with them, but that person still has to be of the gender as specified by your (romantic) orientation.

If "demisexual" were the same as romantic orientation (or a different kind of romantic orientation) we would be able to say that someone is a demisexual asexual - an oxymoron, as a asexual that doesn't feel sexually attracted to anyone, emotional connection non-withstanding.

Which is all just a very long way of saying yes, "x-romantic" is another qualifier, but a fundamentally different one than "demisexual"***. Romantic orientation is the non-sexual equivalent of sexual orientation, and the other half that builds the concept of orientation. Demisexuality is neither a subset or romantic, nor sexual orientation and has, therefore, be treated as a different concept.

(I really hope this makes sense. It's 4am for me and I didn't get much sleep yesterday. And, I should note that this is all just personal opinion. I'm not an expert at this, nor did I study or do extensive research on the topic of sexuality and/or orientation.)

* For the sake of simplicity and intelligibility I'll disregard fluidity of orientation and presuppose that a person is either 100% hetero/homo/bi/pan/a-sexual/romantic.

**In as much as we actually need labels, which is a different discussion.

*** Discounting the debate about whether or not "demisexual" is actually a valid qualifier at all or, as other people said, merely a different kind of slut-shaming. For the sake of simplicity I assumed for this and my previous comment that demisexuality is an actual thing.

Excellent answer, and totally coherent and makes sense.

I find this whole conversation interesting, thanks for playing. ;)

[ SECRET POST #1907 ]

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