fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #1925 ]

⌈ Secret Post #1925 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 070 secrets from Secret Submission Post #275.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat (same text, different image) ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

LOL exactly
I mean, I get OP's point, but OP needs to understand that in her friend's mind something like going to church or accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior™ is a serious matter, like a life and death situation, whereas the decision to join a fandom or not join one is not. I understand that to people who are not religious, they don't see it that way, but someone who is that religious DOES see it that way. To them, they see it as OMG SAVING YOUR SOUL so urging you to go to church is like urging you to go to the ER because you're having a heart attack; it's literally that important to them

For the record, because people always assume this shit about me when I get into these conversations -- I'M NOT CHRISTIAN. NOT EVANGELICAL. NOT RELIGIOUS (in the sense that I do not belong to an organized religion and don't practice a religion). But I understand the thought process of someone who is religious, in this case probably evangelical (doesn't mean I agree with it)

TL;DR IT'S NOT HYPOCRISY

Honestly OP, just tell your friend that you aren't interested in being Christian and if they keep bothering you about it and don't get the hint after that -- don't be their friend anymore. It's as simple as that.

Why can't it be the religious person who "needs to understand" that in her friend's mind, something like going to church or accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior™ is not a serious matter? Why's the onus on the OP to accept her friend's religion, but not on the friend to accept her friend's lack of it?

The onus is on both them to accept the other, but Religious Friend can't really do that if they don't know how OP feels.

Someone said above:

http://fandomsecrets.livejournal.com/871223.html?thread=537632311#t537632311

I'm not saying that OP needs to accept her friend's religion, where did I say that? In fact, I very clearly said the opposite -- that if this friend can't understand that OP wants no part of Christianity, perhaps they should end the friendship. I'm very OPPOSED to evangelical Christianity and I understand completely how annoying it is for someone to constantly beg you to go to church. I'm just saying, I can see how proselytizing and begging someone to join a fandom are completely different.

Yeah, this. I'm a Christian, but I hate it when people push our religion onto others because that's NOT a good way to introduce your beliefs to someone. It's irritating enough when someone's trying to get me to ship something or watch a TV show, but if some atheist (or Hindu or Buddhist or Jedi etc) came up to me and started trying to drag me into their religion I'd probably react even more badly. I personally think it's much better to do your best to treat everyone--EVERYONE--around you with love and respect, be open about your faith, and if people are interested (keyword: interested!) in hearing about it, THEN you can talk to them about your religion. Espeeeecially in a culture like ours where most people do know at least some about Jesus and the gospel. I think Jesus himself did that quite a bit. So I completely understand why people would be bothered and offended by someone being pushy, demanding or Bible-bashing, particularly if you make it clear that you're not interested. "Do undo others," after all.

That being said, yeah, for someone that obviously cares about her faith the way OP does, fandom and religion are on way, way, WAY different levels of importance. If someone pointed a gun to my head and said "Spit on this copy of your favorite manga!" I'd probably do it. Fandom isn't worth losing my life over it. But if someone did the same thing with a Bible--well, I'd hope I'd refuse, because yeah, to me my faith is more important than my life. As a kid I was a lot more zealous about this sort of thing, too, so I can understand OP's friend's perspective. It wasn't that I wanted to be cruel, I just genuinely thought of it as a LIFE OR DEATH sort of thing and I was so insistent because I actually cared about people. So...yeah, you can say "it's hypocrisy" but if you REALLY care about something and truly feel that it matters, it make sense that you'd want to tell people about it. This isn't just religion (or fandom), it could be politics, some sort of cause you feel strongly about, etc. Everyone has that sort of thing that they want to trumpet, but I'm sure even the people who get really into them want to be dragged to see a movie they're not interested in.

Honestly OP, just tell your friend that you aren't interested in being Christian and if they keep bothering you about it and don't get the hint after that -- don't be their friend anymore. It's as simple as that.

Yeah, also this. I don't think there's anything wrong with cutting ties with someone when they're being really belligerent and just won't take the hint. Sometimes that stuff just gets...IDK, unhealthy and not worthwhile for either party to deal with anymore.

(As an aside, I think it's important to realize that we're not getting the full story here--we're getting a short summary of one side's opinion on it. OP's friend could be a Bible-toting religious nut who never stops talking about her religion and won't take no for an answer and is just a pain in the ass to be around, or should could just be occasionally mentioning "hey, do you want to go to church with me sometime?" every now and then and OP's overreacting and exaggerating. We really have no idea, so assuming too much one way or the other...well...I don't know if it's really good.)

TL;DR: I agree that it's not hypocrisy but that her friend could be potentially way too pushy and should knock it off because that's not the way to share something you care about. And apologies for yappinig your ear off. ^^;;

but if some atheist [...] came up to me and started trying to drag me into their religion

Errr...or "drag me into their non-religion/badger me about their opinions on religion" or something. Athiesm isn't really a religion, and I need to proof read things carefully.

[ SECRET POST #1925 ]

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