[ SECRET POST #1947 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1947 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


__________________________________________________



02.


__________________________________________________



03.


__________________________________________________



04.


__________________________________________________



05.


__________________________________________________



06.


__________________________________________________



07.


__________________________________________________



08. [broken]


__________________________________________________



09.


__________________________________________________



10.


__________________________________________________



11.


__________________________________________________



12.


__________________________________________________



13.


__________________________________________________



14.


__________________________________________________



15.


__________________________________________________



16. [broken]


__________________________________________________



17.


__________________________________________________



18.


__________________________________________________



19.


__________________________________________________



20.


__________________________________________________



21.


__________________________________________________



22.


__________________________________________________









Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 068 secrets from Secret Submission Post #278.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

(frozen comment)

[megalomaniageek.livejournal.com]

Did I suddenly walk into the thread-based dramatic re-enactment of that South Park episode about bullying? The one where all the anti-bullying folks were bullying each other in the bathroom?

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

Yes, obviously the thing to take away from this is that opinionated discussion is bullying.

(frozen comment)

[megalomaniageek.livejournal.com]

Saying "shut the fuck up you miserable piece of shit" and "nobody cares about your feelings" sounds a lot more like bullying than opinionated discussion. Opinionated discussion does not require people saying things that are intentionally mean in order to hurt others' feelings. Fandom is not suddenly free from bullying just because it's frivolous.

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

Bullying is a lot more than just "being mean." Are you being willfully obtuse or are you really that fucking dense?

(frozen comment)

[megalomaniageek.livejournal.com]

Well since you're so amazingly knowledgeable about everything, care to enlighten me?

And in case you honestly think I'm just stupid, I realize that without a pervasive pattern it can't be considered "bullying" but the kind of behavior and ways of addressing OP I'm seeing here, if visited upon OP regularly, would seem an awful lot like bullying to me. But you know, in that South Park joke I made, the "bullying" was just a guy in a bathroom on one occasion, it wasn't a pattern of abuse.

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

Bullying is about control, dipshit. It's about systematically breaking someone down through fear. It's about asserting dominance over others by making them so fucking terrified of you that they will literally do anything you want to avoid being targeted. To go that far? You need way more than just "mean words" thrown around.

(frozen comment)

[megalomaniageek.livejournal.com]

That's an academic definition though, and a narrow one at that. It's bullying when a group of girls spread a rumor you're a lesbian in order to completely socially isolate you, but I wasn't "so fucking terrified of them that I would do literally anything they wanted to avoid being targeted." It's also bullying when a group of boys decide to beat the shit out of you every day at recess - that feeling ran a little closer to your definition. But what control did they get out of it? They never managed to get me to do anything. Only one of the bullies who targeted me in elementary school actually manipulated me to do what she wanted, and it was through subtle verbal manipulation. Others just seemed to not like me, and that's why they hit me or spread rumors or insulted me.

Also, verbal abuse is made up of "mean words." If a person told me that their SO said stuff like "shut the fuck up you miserable piece of shit" and "nobody cares about your feelings" in arguments, I'd say "You're in an emotionally abusive relationship, get out now." It is different to hear that stuff from a stranger once, but they are still harmful words.
The whole point of using those words is to belittle the confidence of the other person so you can convince them to agree with you using shame rather than logic. Oh my god it's almost like meanness is about control!

Again, I get that bullying and abuse have to be patterns to count. But this kind of behavior is unacceptably hostile.

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

It doesn't have to succeed in getting control to be bullying, but that's the goal of a bully. But hey, go ahead and split hairs so you can get your widdle hurt fandom fee-fees to count up there with being systematically beaten, stalked, and threatened if it makes you feel better, and you don't mind offending the shit out of people.

And no, I don't think you "get it" or you would quit making such a stupid argument. Again, not sure if willfully obtuse or just stupid.

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

You don't agree that hearing a mean statement from a faceless anonymous person on the internet for something really stupid is different from those examples you cited?

There's a huge difference between getting bullied in real life over your race or sexual orientation or weight or whatever and having to go to school/work/everywhere in fear, and getting yelled at on the internet for your opinions on cartoon sex. If you -- general you -- can't see that then, well, maybe you're one of those people who's so far down the rabbit hole that the latter is your life so I guess I can see how that would affect you to an abnormal degree, but that doesn't make it the same.

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

(frozen comment)

[megalomaniageek.livejournal.com]

I say: It is different to hear that stuff from a stranger once, but they are still harmful words.
You say: You don't agree that hearing a mean statement from a faceless anonymous person on the internet for something really stupid is different from those examples you cited?

Yes, it is different to hear mean things from a stranger once than it is to hear mean things from your peers regularly. The former is not bullying, the latter is bullying.
Holy shit this teaches me to make jokes about South Park and get caught up in rambling discussions that take them seriously.

Also you seem to be conflating the argument over whether cyberbullying is a thing with the argument over whether bullying has to be caused by something serious, like some sort of social justice issue, or whether it can be caused by dumb shit like shipping.

Folks have killed themselves because of cyberbullying. So the fact that people can log off and get new screen names and aren't necessarily afraid to go to school doesn't mean, to me, that cyberbullying doesn't count. As to the cause, I judge bullying by the words and behavior involved, and to me the cause is irrelevant.

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

Yep, going with "just stupid." Even a willfully obtuse douchebag would've figured it out by now.

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

You realize that in like 99.9% of cyberbullying suicides, the bullies ARE people the victims know in real life and in many cases have to see every day at work/school, and that the medium is incidental to bullying that's occurring concurrently in actual real life, right? And that this basically invalidates your entire comparison between legitimate bullying and getting notes from an angry Snarry fan on Deviantart or some shit?

I don't even know what the fuck to say to the rest of that. I mean, god damn.

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

Even if the relative number of people who harm or kill themselves because of cyber bullying is small, shouldn't people take a moment to think before they type? Ranting in FS is fun, but based on some comments here, I have tried to limited the number of gender specific curse words I use (both male and female). I fail to see how this is much different than when I signed an agreement to not use the word retard during an anti-bullying charity event.

Admittedly, it's more personal social sites that tend to cause the most harm.


Some facts about cyber bullying in Japan (the rest of the article is here:http://factsanddetails.com/japan.php?itemid=829&catid=23&subcatid=150)

Internet bullying involving middle school and high school age youths is increasingly becoming a problem in Japan. One survey in 2008 found that a high percentage of Gakki-Ura-site: bulletin boards used by young people in Japan contained abusive messages often directed by one young person against another.


E-mail bullying is especially common with middle and high school students. Those that engage in the practice often hide their identities; send hate mail and fake message using the return e-mail of others; and tap into certain cell phone website to get the e-mail addresses of others. In one case a couple received fake message from the other saying they wanted to break up. They did break up. The messages are believed to have been sent by someone jealous of the couple’s relationship. “Bombing” refers to practice of sending up to 10,000 messages with false return e-mail addresses.


In March 2008, a 13-year-old girl hung herself in the bathroom at her middle school. She apparently was distraught after being scolding by the parents of a girl she had sent a defamatory e-mail message to. In June 2008, a 16-year-old girl hung herself at her home, leaving behind a note saying that nasty things had been written about her in her blog. One student confessed later that she wrote “Die” and “you make me sick” in the dead girl’s blog.


In October 2008, of 14-year-old middle school student in Saitama hung herself in her room. The suicide was initially attributed to scolding by her parents over test results. But in a suicide note she left behind the victim said she hated middle school and mentioned the names of people who wrote nasty things about her—like she’s “disgusting” and “I don’t want to get into a swimming pool with her”— on a public cell phone Web site.


A professor at Gunma University designed an online-bully detector that uses keywords such as “irrigating,” “disgusting” and “kill yourself” to detect possible abusive messages.

http://articles.baltimoresun.com/2012-04-17/news/bs-md-ho-cyber-suicide-20120417_1_cyber-bullying-deb-poquette-cyberbullying-research-center

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_of_Megan_Meier

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/06/rafael-morelos-gay-washington-suicide_n_1258471.html

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

Reading comprehension fail. You just missed the entire point of the comment you replied to. The cases you're listing are all where the cyberbullying was completely incidental, and the bullies were people the victim knew outside the internet, who were just using the internet as yet another tool.

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

Well, if people would stop just "being mean", it would never get to the point of bullying.

(frozen comment)

[silverau.livejournal.com]

+1