[ SECRET POST #1963 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #1963 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

















12. [SPOILERS for ASOIAF]



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13. [SPOILERS for Game of Thrones]



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14. [SPOILERS for Prototype 2]



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15. [SPOILERS for Young Justice]



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16. [SPOILERS for Avengers]



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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]


















17. [TRIGGER WARNING for suicide]

[Oblivion]


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18. [TRIGGER WARNING for rape]

[Spartacus: Blood and Sand]


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19. [TRIGGER WARNING for abuse/rape? I think. better safe anyway]

[Rihanna, Man Down]


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20. [TRIGGER WARNING for abuse]



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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #280.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom.livejournal.com]

17.
http://i.imgur.com/KjfVl.jpg
[Oblivion]

[(Anonymous)]

I've said this--and variations of this--to myself many, many times. I think that the reality is that wanting to finish some creative endeavor or other pleasurable thing before you kill yourself means that you don't truly want to die. I'm not saying this to put you down, OP. I'm somebody who's tried to off myself more than once, so I don't even have a miniature pony to sit on much less a high horse. Just, in my experience planning and/or attempting suicide fucks your life up worse than it was in the first place, and I'm really hoping you decide not to do it.

[(Anonymous)]

I never understood how someone can "fail" at killing themselves. Humans are so impossibly fragile, there are literally MILLIONS of ways to get it done. Not saying that I want you to, but there was even a New York Times best seller book that gave you step-by-step instructions. It isn't difficult unless you're wanting to look pretty or just get attention. If you truly want to be dead, you'll strip down naked, cover yourself in honey, and go piss off some bears in the woods.

[(Anonymous)]

It isn't difficult unless you're wanting to look pretty or just get attention.

Oh fuck you.

[(Anonymous)]

We're also remarkably resilient and the human body has a very strong will to live. Also, we didn't always have the internet to look up exactly how much of what would do what. The things that are the most certain to work and are most accessible are very physical and violent and for me at least the problem is that the dumb animal of my body wants to continue living even when my brain doesn't. I got very close through non-violent means. It should have worked but just as my heart wasn't going to be able to beat much longer my body won.

Also, fuck you, you smug bitch.

[(Anonymous)]

nayrt

there is a time and place for this kind of comment.

this was not it.

(also, your example was horrible. that is in no way a reliable way to kill oneself)

[(Anonymous)]

My example was obviously sarcasm, but my question was legit. I wasn't trying to be a horrible person, just wanting clarity on how one fails at committing suicide. That's it. Lots of resources on HOW, not a lot on how it fails.

[(Anonymous)]

Also, no reliable way to kill yourself? I'd like to think that throwing myself off of the tallest building in my town would do the job, or tying cement blocks to my feet and throwing myself overboard would do the trick. Maybe that's just me?

I can see how slitting your wrists or tying to overdose would backfire though.

[(Anonymous)]

Well ... I might be about to stick my foot in it, lol.

I've spent one summer close to bears, and yeah, the honey thing might work but it would be awfully painful. Plus the sheer animal sense of fear takes over when there's a bear close. Plus the rangers wouldn't ever let you get out of the lodge with honey. (Yes, you were being sarcastic -- I'm just saying that I think there are reasons why the most "obvious" methods don't work on first try.)

Seriously, as for how one fails? I think that any method to ask the question inevitably triggers some pretty strong emotions and defensive responses (as I guess are playing out). In my experience, though -- suicide itself is a battleground. There's some part of your head and heart that still wants a better life, but you don't believe it's possible anymore. You can quite literally get to a point where you don't believe in the reality of your own existence. And those are the moments -- or years -- when you're desperate to get out. As for how you can fail when you want it that strongly -- suicide is something that's kind of hard to research. Not hard as in there aren't the resources out there, but hard as in it feels wrong, it's a battleground in itself too.

OP, though -- I'm with the first commentator -- as long as you're alive, you can still be surprised. And if your fic is giving you a reason to get out of bed in the morning, start another fic before you've finished this one. And another.

I can say that I'm still here because I desperately wanted to see the Buffy finale. (One of my friends asked me if it was worth it, and then had to back up and go, "not that I"m not glad I got to meet you, but I hated the finale" -- and then we both laughed over it.) Just ... find those moments, those little reasons, one day, one moment at a time. Things will turn around, even if it takes years.

[with-rainfall.livejournal.com]

+900

[fierceawakening.livejournal.com]

I think that the reality is that wanting to finish some creative endeavor or other pleasurable thing before you kill yourself means that you don't truly want to die.

I think so too. Having something to do or make = having a reason to live.

Just go from one of those to the next, and you might just be okay, even.

Not saying this to be all XDXD SEE HEALING IS EASY NO WORRIES XDXD or something else belitting. Saying it because it's how, at times, I myself have survived.

[(Anonymous)]

YOU BETTER OR I WILL KILL YOUR DICK.

[anonlulz.livejournal.com]

If you have a beta, it'll take a while. Those are really lazy.

[anonlulz.livejournal.com]

Personally, I don't like to pull the "don't do it! You'll hurt your loved ones!" card.

In rare cases, they're trolls. In some cases, they don't care. In other cases, they have no one and you're unknowingly rubbing it in.

Also, you take away their "freedom", by commanding them DON'T DO IT. It could backfire if the person wants to regain control of the situation. ^{(I know someone attacked me for this before; so, disclaimer: I do not mean I'm fine with people offing themselves.)}


If it helps, OP, what I did when I reached my limit was to sit down and think about my problems. I had no one to confide with. I was stuck with two choices: the streets or my death. I didn't want to back down. But then, I was inspired by Voldemort (of all things!). Sometimes, you just have to play along, get the tools from the enemy, and then strike when they think you've turned to their side. I don't know what goes on in your life, OP, but if it's anything like my situation, consider it.

[(Anonymous)]

If it helps, OP, what I did when I reached my limit was to sit down and think about my problems. I had no one to confide with. I was stuck with two choices: the streets or my death. I didn't want to back down.

Same here. I had no one to confide in or talk to, so I just sat down one day with my little collection of pills and went through all my problems and reasons why/why not and really thought about it. I figured, do it or don't but stop using it as an easy out excuse. Either do it once and for all or stop and figure how the hell to make a change. Not that it was easy, and I'm still struggling, but...I don't even know where I'm going with this so I'll just stop and hit enter. I wish you luck in life and hope things work out, OP.

[anonlulz.livejournal.com]

+1

That's really good, anon. It's not easy to face or find a way around the problems we have.

[(Anonymous)]

Please talk to somebody IRL. If this is true, please talk to somebody. Suicide is a terrible, terrible thing.

[castorochiaro.livejournal.com]

As somebody who genuinely believed there was no future for me that wasn't painful, miserable failure at everything that mattered to me and attempted to take her own life not long ago...please. Please please PLEASE reach out to somebody you trust. If you have nobody, you have me, you have other survivors who live with these thoughts and self-hatred and are making a life for themselves. We'll listen if that's what you need. We'll point you to someone that can help.

I'm getting the help I needed now, and I cannot stress enough that it IS possible for things to change and it IS possible for you to get better. I've still got so much to work through but I feel like I understand myself and my emotions more than I ever did before.

Please don't go out like that, OP.

[raichu100.livejournal.com]

Want to second what castorochiaro said (and others). Those of us who have experienced suicidal feelings and had times where we had no desire to move on are there for you. Please feel free to message me if you need to talk to someone about it.

I hope and pray that you will find a resource irl to help you deal with this situation, OP. There IS hope, even when it seems like none is there.

And I'm really glad you have something to keep you going. I'm glad fanfic is something you can be invested in and enjoy.