fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2031 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2031 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 043 secrets from Secret Submission Post #290.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

While I could dig that take on her, I think that would ridiculously unfair to Snape, unless she truly, completely, did not notice that he was in love with her.

If she took his virginity and knew he was crushing on her but still treated him as a friend as we can glimpse from the books... yeah, that was using him.

If she took his virginity but for some reason never realized how much he liked her, then; I don't know, I know we don't know a lot of her character, but I don't think she was that clueless.

And if she didn't have sex with him but had sex with everyone else, that was like telling him that he wasn't worth or attractive enough, and while I could see trying to differentiate friends from lovers, there is still some self-esteem messing misunderstandings stuff that I suppose happens a lot amongst teenagers (and even adults), but I think she would come to regret that very heavily and I just didn't get that vibe from her; but again, we only got glimpses of her and her generation.

*that would be

tl;dr: Not a bad idea by itself, but I have a lot of trouble reconciling what we knew of her to the kind of person who would behave like that

which... I guess would actually make her character more realistic, now that I think about it

but the fan mind, it boggles

And if she didn't have sex with him but had sex with everyone else, that was like telling him that he wasn't worth or attractive enough

...you're joking, right? Please tell me you're joking. Or you mean that this could be Snape's twisted, nasty, Nice Guy perception.

bluh bluh that came out wrong didn't it

Yes, more like the second thing you said; she wasn't in love with Snape, but I think she knew him very, very well (and in the memories Harry saw, you could get this vibe that she was always a little scared or nervous because she was aware of his stalkerish/creepy side despite trying very hard to be a good friend to him), so she had to know that "exposing" him, so to speak, to a side of her sexuality would be at the same time hurting him and encouraging a side of him that she didn't want to deal with.

Or you mean that this could be Snape's twisted, nasty, Nice Guy perception.

Iknow, right? Because, how dare a guy have self-esteem/confidence issues. It always has to be "Nice Guy Syndrome."

while i see the op didnt mean it that way the quoted sentence did sound like nice guy syndrome. i believe the objection is that just because someone has sex with lots of other people doesn't mean they can be blamed for the confidence issues of whoever they don't have sex with.

why am i here?

awkward phrasing anon above

" just because someone has sex with lots of other people doesn't mean they can be blamed for the confidence issues of whoever they don't have sex with"

oh, I definitely don't think so, but I said all that above because my impression of Lily is that she would consider that before doing anything because she struck me as someone who was very assertive but also considerate of other people's feelings

sure, but just because you consider someone's feelings doesn't mean you decide they're more important than getting your swerve on.

but i don't think lily was intended to be a promiscuous character, anyway.

Oh, of course Snape shouldn't be like, a metaphorical chastity belt for Lily if she wanted to have sex with other people, I just think that if she really wanted to go for that she would take him into account as a factor and then, I don't know, maybe try to find very discreet partners or if she were feeling very patient that day, try to talk it out with him (if they were that close, I'm really not sure if they were BFFs) and try to gently friend-zone him or cut off the friendship if it proved to be something Snape wouldn't accept or that would make him act badly, and I don't remember getting the later vibe but oh where am I even going with this.

ANYWAY, when I first made my comment, I was only trying to explain why I thought she wouldn't have sex with Snape, and then added my take on "still have sex with others but not Snape", but left that thought incomplete and honestly didn't think it through as much as I should have and now I'm seeing the holes in my logic and how the conclusion is not something that I want to be behind of, because if Lily really wanted to go that route, it would be very shitty to expect for her to not explore a part of herself just because of Snape.

I personally don't see her as promiscuous either, from my own interpretation of her character, but I wouldn't fault her as a person if she was, if that makes sense?

no worries, i get what you're saying.

Um, no? It's Nice Guy syndrome if he blames Lily for it, it's self-esteem/confidence issues if he blames himself for it. Pretty clear distinction.

The OP, on the other hand, was blaming Lily and saying that Snape would be justified in blaming Lily too, because Lily should have known (how? why? and even if she did know, why should she stop if it was completely Snape's problem and not hers?) that she would hurt/encourage Snape if she actually had the audacity to (gasp!) live her own life and do things she liked to do, and because daring to live her own life would hurt Snape, she shouldn't have done it. So I was saying, sarcastically, that I hoped that she meant that her headcanon was that this (blaming Lily) is how Snape felt, and not what the OP thought was right.

(For the record, I personally don't think Snape was a Nice Guy — he never blamed Lily for anything or felt he deserved her or tried to make her feel bad for not dating him, even if he was creepy and stalkerish and a shitty friend and stuff).

[ SECRET POST #2031 ]

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