[ SECRET POST #2079 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2079 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 057 secrets from Secret Submission Post #297.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: help dealing with partner

[forgottenjester]

Have you talked to him about this or have you just implied it?

One of my friends is on the spectrum and we have an agreement about, "If anything confuses one of us, ask. If anything makes one of us feel bad. Tell and explain."

But even if he wasn't on the spectrum I find the previously stated mentality helpful in all relationships.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

I think it's definitely an anti-stress mechanism sometimes like you said, and it probably is unintentional sometimes too. We've talked about communication problems here and there but this kind of thing is the hardest for me to even bring up because like...it comes up when he does it, and then I'll feel all stung and hurt so I wanna hold off talking about it until I'm calmer, or else it won't be a constructive discussion, it'll just be passive-aggressive lashing out and that's just making things worse. I'll have to make it a point to keep examples in mind so I can take him aside during cooler times and try to ask him about it with more specificity. I have some doubts about the relationship, but I do want to keep trying and see if it'll work. I appreciate the advice!

Re: OP

[forgottenjester]

It seems to me you need to have this discussion before coming to any conclusion because you don't know how he would react to you actually telling him these things.

I understand you wanting to come at it with a clear head. What if you collected a few examples beforehand and then meet up with him at some point to specifically discuss it? Schedule a time and place to talk about it.

How he reacts to your concerns should help you decide if you should stay together to become friends instead.