[ SECRET POST #2086 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2086 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 060 secrets from Secret Submission Post #298.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

I'm not getting that off this post at all. OP's complaint really isn't that they don't read or play the stuff OP recs--because eventually they do, and apparently enjoy it--but they only read/play it after someone else has rec'd it too. I can see how that might come off as implying they don't trust OP's judgment enough to read something just on OP's suggestion; not until someone else has rec'd it too do they deign to check it out.

[(Anonymous)]

DA

So you jump to watch every new series that each friend recs you because you trust their taste implicitly? Even if they're the only ones reccing it?

Yeah no, it doesn't work like that for most people. If you get a bunch of people saying some show is awesome that is a lot more effective than one person because the show obviously appeals to a wider range of people you know rather than one person who gets butthurt you won't watch their shows.

[(Anonymous)]

I just don't see why you would bother to pretend you want someone's opinion if you invariably ignore it.

[(Anonymous)]

What? Because you want to know what they think? Knowing what someone thinks =/= automatically following through on whatever they advise.

[(Anonymous)]

Ehh, if someone kept asking me for my advice, and then kept ignoring it, eventually I'd get the impression that they didn't value my opinion and most likely, didn't want advice at all.

[(Anonymous)]

BAD FRIEND: "What should I watch this weekend?"
OP: "Avatar."
OTHER FRIEND: "Naruto."
OTHER OTHER FRIEND: "Avengers."
BAD FRIEND: "Looking them over, I think I'll watch Avengers."
OTHER OTHER OTHER FRIEND: "Wait no, Avatar is great!"
BAD FRIEND: "Okay, Avatar it is then!"

So the bad friend is ignoring OP and only pretended to want their opinion? You make no sense.

[(Anonymous)]

FRIEND: What should I watch this weekend?
OP: Avatar
FRIEND (watches something else)

If this happens a few times, ehh, them's the breaks.
If this is a pattern that happens whenever your friend asks for your advice, you can be forgiven for suspecting that your friend doesn't think your opinion is worth listening to.

[hiyami]

The way I read the secret, it's the latter.
Or the case described above, which is even more of a bummer.

Also, why ask for recs if you're not going to pay attention?

[(Anonymous)]

nayrt

Um...What's the point in asking a friend for recs then? When I ask a friend for a rec, it's because I trust his/her judgement. If I didn't, I wouldn't ask. You don't need a rec for a popular show-- it's already staring you in the face.

[(Anonymous)]

When I ask for recs from different people, I'm going to ask more than one person because again, wider range of replies. If I get 25 different shows in response I sure as hell am not going to watch 25 different shows! If someone else recs the same show as OP then maybe I'll watch that one because two people recced it. Is that seriously that hard to understand?

[(Anonymous)]

I didn't think of it that way. Having 2 recs from 2 different people does make sense, and is less about trusting judgement.

I'm used to only getting a small number of recs from a small number of people, and then doing a little personal research.

[(Anonymous)]

Usually when people ask for recs AFAIK it's an open post or they are asking more people than just one person. It's not that they don't trust their friends' judgement, it's that if two or more friends agree that you'd like some show they're more likely to be right than one person reccing one show. Not every friend sees every side of you or knows exactly what you like especially if they're in different fandoms from each other.

[(Anonymous)]

Um, is that how rec from friends work for you? I guess then I sort of understand why you are so judgemental towards the OP.

In my experience recs happen usually during a conversations 1 on 1 or with a group of friends. I used to have online friends like the OP too. They recommended me something, I read it/watched/played it, we talked about it. I recommended them something they didn't. They only got interested when someone else recommended it to them. And that kept on repeating until I stopped caring to keep up with their interests and we slowly drifted apart.

If you don't get it, then don't get it, but if you ignore your friend's opinion all the time, I don't think I would enjoy being your friend, because I don't think that's what friendship is about.

But then again, after reading your comments it seems like you're coming from the perspective of someone who asks for recs on places like tumblr where anyone can chime in and where people usually are not friends because they don't really talk to each other.

Ah, whatever.