fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2101 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2101 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 040 secrets from Secret Submission Post #300.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 2 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 2 - take it to comments ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

So today I was at lunch with a friend of mine and their friend (let's call her Barbie). At the beginning it was all normal, we started talking about our common interests and everything was good. Then at the end of the lunch the Barbie started talking about her male friend (Charlie) who is into bondage and who shared a photo with her. She was talking rather loud about his personal life which he obviously shared with her in confidence. THEN she said she shared the photo on a forum without Charlie's consent.

I asked Barbie if she thinks it's alright to do that and she answered that what he doesn't know won't hurt him.

I didn't know how to react, this never happened to me before. I was totally stunned until we paid for the lunch and parted ways.

How would you react? Did something similar happen to you?

Rat this twat the fuck out if you know how to get in contact with Charlie.

Adding that picture to my response images.

I did the exact same thing.

That's awkward and really, really messed up. Especially sharing the photo, WTF.

I have a few friends who tend to share details about others' personal lives a lot. I usually just try to change the subject. Occasionally outright tell them that they shouldn't have shared that with me, though I give up when they do it too often. And then I make the mental note to never tell them anything.

I was willing to give her the benefit of the doubt until you said she posted the picture on a FORUM. Holy shit, now that photo can go all over the internet without his knowledge or consent. CREEPY.

I definitely wouldn't want to hang out with anyone that would do that. I want to say you should let Charlie know, too, although that'd probably get messy.

MTE. Her mentioning it was wrong and a breach of trust in the first place, but putting the picture online where anyone can save, keep it, or upload it to other sites? That's all kinds of skeevy and disgusting. Seriously, what if his friends or family found it? Just...no, that is wrong on so many levels.

So, yea, if you have any way to contact this guy, I think you should (even if you do it anonymously). He should know what's going on.

Also, how did your friend react to this? Did she look uncomfortable or just go along with it? IDK about you but if she had no problem with it, I don't think I'd want to hang out with her again either. (To me that would be a signal that she's 'okay' with that kind of behavior, and I wouldn't be able to trust her.)

I would tell Charlie. Barbie is a horrible "friend" and he needs to know immediately so he doesn't reveal anything else to her.

I would go on to explain that yes, what they don't know can actually hurt them. Posting pictures, especially sexual pictures, of someone online can have a lot of real life consequences and the person in the picture should always have a say and be aware of the situation. I know of a woman who had her pictures posted without her permission and...it got really ugly for her.

If you know Charlie tell him. It's awkward and weird and uncomfortable but he needs to know.

You need to let her know that what she's doing is absolutely out of bounds, at least attempt to express why what she's doing is harmful and wrong, and that you don't want to hear anything else in this vein. You should also make a mental note that any personal information you share with her will also most likely receive the same consideration she gave Charlie.

If at all possible you should absolutely let him know what is going on.

I was in a similar situation and, like you, asked for advice on this comm and ultimately got in contact with the woman whose personal life was being talked about and I can say it was the right decision. Charlie has a right to know what is going on so he can protect himself or at least make informed choices about what he chooses to share with Barbie.

Yeah, that's fucked up if she posted it everywhere without his knowledge and consent. How did you and your friend react? How did Barbie EXPECT someone to react to that?

I'm not really sure what I would do. Probably a mix of surprise and thinly-disguised disgust.

I would be pissed if friends of mine did that to me -heck one girl is the type to do it, so I typically avoid her. We have a lot of mutual friends so avoiding her got me in trouble initially, but thankfully the friends were understanding and yelled at her for overstepping my boundaries.

So, that being said you likely should tell him if you can. :/

[ SECRET POST #2101 ]

Someone sharing intimate details of another person's life

Re: Someone sharing intimate details of another person's life

Re: Someone sharing intimate details of another person's life

Re: Someone sharing intimate details of another person's life

+1

Re: Someone sharing intimate details of another person's life

Re: Someone sharing intimate details of another person's life

Re: Someone sharing intimate details of another person's life

Re: Someone sharing intimate details of another person's life

Re: Someone sharing intimate details of another person's life

Re: Someone sharing intimate details of another person's life

Re: Someone sharing intimate details of another person's life

uurgh