[ SECRET POST #2105 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2105 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 05 pages, 107 secrets from Secret Submission Post #301.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

havin' a real bad case of gay panic this weekend

[(Anonymous)]

So I have always considered myself bisexual, but recently I am starting to wonder if I'm actually just really gay? I've only gotten sexual with one guy, but whenever we get down to business I just feel sort of put off. Like, it's fine until I have to engage with his dick. BJs and handjobs are a chore and I don't enjoy giving them at all. I haven't had actual sex, so maybe that would be different? But I feel like it's probably not normal for someone who is supposed to be interested in guys to be so put off by all this other stuff. I think I like him romantically, but physically this is just not working for me. Am I gay? Or is it possibly just that we aren't physically compatible for whatever reason?

Re: havin' a real bad case of gay panic this weekend

[(Anonymous)]

Hard to say. When you think about fantasy dudes do you end up feeling the same if you fantasize about BJs or HJs? What is it about dudes that made you think you were bi in the first place?

Re: havin' a real bad case of gay panic this weekend

[(Anonymous)]

Are you male or female? I'm finding it hard to pin down whether you think you're gay because you're not that into guys, or despite not being into guys, you think you're gay.

Re: havin' a real bad case of gay panic this weekend

[(Anonymous)]

Oh, so many possibilities. This is why sexuality is so strange and hard to pin down. Not in a bad way, mind you. Just strange.

Speaking from experience, it is totally possible to be romantically bisexual (or insert other orientation here) but physically attracted to only one sex or another. Personally, I have been in relationships with both guys and girls, and I have had crushes/whatever on both guys and girls. However, my (female) fiance notwithstanding, I am far more sexually attracted to guys, generally speaking. I am very happy in my sex life right now, but she's the exception, not the norm.

So, is it possible that you might like to date guys but not have sex with them? Sure. Is it also possible that it's just not working out with this particular guy? Sure. I find it helps me if I think about individual relationships rather than trying to label myself into a neat box. Gay/bi/straight don't always work for everyone.

Re: havin' a real bad case of gay panic this weekend

[(Anonymous)]

I dunno. Are you?

I considered myself bi for most of my teens. Then there were times I really thought I was straight. And other times when I thought I was completely gay.

It wasn't until I was 20 when I had a minor freakout, thought for a long time about my entire life, and realized I felt that 'gay' was the only thing that clicked for me.

Not wanting to give him a handjob or oral (btw, those are 'actual sex' too), by itself, doesn't really mean anything. I've never tried that and I know I'm gay. I know plenty of straight women who hate doing that.

You could be gay or you could just not be into this guy's dick, but you're the only one who can figure that out.

Either way, it's normal. Don't panic.

Re: havin' a real bad case of gay panic this weekend

[yeahscience]

Have you tried having sex with women? Are you put off by that?

I don't know, I'm bi and sexually lean towards men, and I still find that stuff off-putting sometimes, but I also have a pretty low sex drive. LOL, forever alone.

Re: havin' a real bad case of gay panic this weekend

[omorka]

It's possible you just don't have much chemistry with him, specifically. And there are a lot of people of all orientations who don't particularly enjoy sucking cock - I love it, but several of my straight female friends and one of my gay male friends find it kind of gross, for example. Haven't heard of that being as big an issue with handjobs, but I can imagine it happening.