fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2148 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2148 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Maybe I'm weird but I assume every character is asexual and uninterested in romance until told otherwise. And it doesn't have to be canon that tells me. I'll let fics go in a sexual and romantic direction even if the canon never has for the character.

I just... that's the default for all characters for me. I don't know why.

I do this too! I think part of it is me assuming that every person is like me unless proven otherwise, haha.

Ahaha, same. It's mostly my normal so I use that as default.

I have a question if i may. What's the difference between a character who just hasn't had storyline sex (or it's just not mentioned), and a asexual character.

I've never been able to get a completely clear picture of exactly what defines asexuality. I'd love to learn...please...

Ah, well, I'm applying the term asexual in a headcanon type of way to characters who haven't had storyline sex, probably incorrectly in most cases.

The difference is that a person can choose not to have sex for many different reasons. They could simply be waiting for someone they like, they could have a medical condition, they might not want to at the moment, they may be restricting themselves because of religious reasons. I'm pretty sure there are more.

However, those people could be any sexuality; gay, bi, straight, pan, etc.

Asexuality is one of these. It is characterized by a lack of wanting for any sex at all. However, like most sexualities, this is a spectrum. While some never want to have anything to do with sex or sex-like activities, others do not mind engaging in sex if they are dating a sexual partner. Masturbation can be done or not done. For those who do, they explain it as "needing to scratch an itch".

Now, you're probably wondering why an asexual, someone who is generally uninterested in sex, would be dating. This is because romantic love is considered different from sexual desire. Some asexuals do not wish for romantic relationships either. However, there are those who wish to have romantic relationships. Ideally they would find another asexual who would return their affections. However, considering asexuals are such a small group, this is difficult. Therefore, those who are willing, engage in relationships with sexual people, which can mean they might engage in sexual situations in order to please their partner. The ones who do this have likened it to washing the dishes or buying flowers for their partner. It's something nice they can do for them even if they don't enjoy the physical aspect. They do enjoy making their partners happy.

So the short of it is: abstaining from sex is a choice and (in)action while asexuality is a person's sexuality.

Wow, Asexuality is amazingly complex. O_O

I assume them just like gay, bi, straight, and pan people are born asexual?

Asexuality is like the other sexualities, yes.

Therefore, those who are willing, engage in relationships with sexual people, which can mean they might engage in sexual situations in order to please their partner. The ones who do this have likened it to washing the dishes or buying flowers for their partner. It's something nice they can do for them even if they don't enjoy the physical aspect. They do enjoy making their partners happy.

This is the bit I don't know if I'll ever understand fully. I just can't wrap my mind around sex, that isn't....sex?

It's all so confusing.

Well, the body still responds to stimulus even if the recipient does not want it to. Hence, why there are rape victims who orgasm. Which a whole 'nother barrel of worms I know for a fact I am not qualified to go into.

Asexuals who choose to have sex with their sexual partners do not have the same emotional response to it sexual people do. Their bodies react but again, it's like scratching an itch. They get more emotional satisfaction out of making their partners happy with the act.

I'm sure someone who has actually done this can give a better explanation than me. I, for one, am a virgin and so have never been in this situation. Secondly, I am currently unsure about my own sexuality and if I am straight or an asexual. Everything I have told you is what I have learned from people who consider themselves to be asexuals.

This video may help you.

As may this website.

[ SECRET POST #2148 ]

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