fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2176 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2176 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Sorry for late, busy day.

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I find it especially amusing that the same people will argue until their blue in the fact that labels like "demisexual" and "grey-A" are necessary, too. I'm not saying they're not necessary - I do think they're helpful for some people - but you can't make sweeping generalizations about "sexuals" and make it sound like we all have the same level of libido/requirements for sleeping with or being in a relationship with someone, while insisting that there should be a label for every slight difference when it comes to asexuality.

Wait

People put "demisexual" under the "asexual" umbrella and not the "sexual" umbrella?

*scratches head*

Yep. On the one hand, I can kind of understand how it falls under the asexual umbrella to a degree, but on the other, all of the "I only want to have sex with people when I have an emotional connection with them!" thing makes me just tilt my head and go "... that's not that unusual?" Then again, it may just be that I've been seeing really shitty explanations of it, and that's why I can't quite wrap my head around it.

I think the idea is supposed to be that it's not only "want to have sex with someone unless there's an emotional bond" but "never get turned on or experience physical attraction unless there's an emotional bond".

I may not personally be interested in having sex with someone who I'm not in a relationship with, but that doesn't mean I stop having a libido when I'm single.

Yeah if that's what it's supposed to mean then it makes sense. I wonder if that's really a thing that a lot of people experience, hmmm. Or if it really needs to be its own "orientation".

Yeah, and I really kinda relate to that too? The only person I've ever actively *wanted* to sleep with was my ex-boyfriend of over three years. And that kind of deep desire only comes for me when I get really close to someone. I mean I can look at a guy and go "man he's attractive" but that doesn't mean I want to fuck him? And I know there are a lot of different way of seeing this and I'm not necessarily in the majority here, but I also know it really isn't uncommon. So if that's what "demisexual" is supposed to mean I think it's just really dumb... (And I am definitely a "sexual" person)

But then again maybe it's not what it's supposed to mean *shrug*

[ SECRET POST #2176 ]

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