[ SECRET POST #2192 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2192 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Tales of the Abyss]


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[Merlin, RPS]


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[Lilo & Stitch]


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 032 secrets from Secret Submission Post #313.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Here's some advice

[chardmonster]

I don't quite understand what you're getting at here. You met IRL and hang out IRL. It doesn't really matter how you first met, they're friends you actually see now.

Besides, nobody ever said anything about hanging out with people you have nothing in common with. Do you think you can only make decent friends in incredibly targeted circumstances?

I stumbled upon an anime fan in my department. AN ANIME FAN. TO WATCH ANIME WITH. And I didn't have to do a targeted internet search for "hometown anime fans" as if I'm some kind of broken person only capable of hanging out with people who share a fandom with me.

I just talked about things I'm interested in and somebody piped up. This is how things were done before the internet was invented.

Re: Here's some advice

[otakugal15]

This.

Re: Here's some advice

[(Anonymous)]

Well aren't you nice and condescending. It's good to know that all you need in order to be happy in life is not to be a "broken person".

You're the perfect example of an extrovert who has no fucking idea why it'd be exhausting for someone to spend time with people you don't know, in a situation they're uncomfortable in, until you find the rare gem that shares an interest with them. Lucky for you someone at your work shares your hobbies, I hope you realize that it's not a universal thing.

Sorry that your 17 yo self had the misfortune of being an awkward extrovert who couldn't manage to make IRL friends (could it be the condescending attitude, I wonder?), but please stop project that on other people.

Re: Here's some advice

[chardmonster]

Did you miss the part where I say I barely go to parties and "going to lunch with somebody" counts as a social life?

Keep on talking to angsty teenagers (literally and in spirit) on the internet. Trying not to be such an ass that you drive people away in person is probably very draining for you.

Re: Here's some advice

[(Anonymous)]

Why? Because contrary to you I understand that different people have different needs? Sorry that you're incapable of comprehending that you =/= everyone.

Re: Here's some advice

[(Anonymous)]

Possibly my answer made no sense to you because your comment itself wasn't clear.

Lucky you to have met a fellow spirit in uni. I studied in uni too, worked in different places for 14 years without meeting anyone who shared any of my fandoms (and I'm talking about things as diverse as anime, comics, TV shows or music). Or was even in a fandom the way I see it.

The closer I met were gamer / computer geeks, but who didn't have anything much to say out of work - and weren't interested to hear, either.

Talking about my hobbies only resulted in people thinking I was weird. Some were polite about it, but that was all.

I don't mind much, but it also means I wasn't going to talk at large about said hobbies unless I was asked about it. When some people think you're a snob for something as mundane as visiting museums, or crazy-obsessive for travelling out of town for a gig, you know it's best not to start explaining fan-fiction.

It's only in the last 3 years that I met people at work I could have actual in-depth discussions with, about a variety of subjects. They're not in fandom, but they're tolerant enough and interesting enough that we can get past weather chat. Still, I can count them on one hand.

So making a lot of efforts to talk to people around you will only work if there *are* people around you who are like that, and it's not the case everywhere.
And actually, if people are interesting and open-minded, it's not really an effort to talk with them.

Tl;dr : my point is : if it's a strain and an effort to talk with someone, it's likely that this person will never be a friend. And then you're wasting your time if you go out of your way to hang out with them.
Hang out at the coffee machine at work or speak to while in classes, yeah, sure.
Go out after work? Tried that many times, and quite frankly, no matter how hard I try, I just pretend I don't feel out of place, and wonder if the people around me do enjoy it, because I find it hard to believe.
So I only do it if I think that it will cause me more harm if I don't do it, socially speaking...

I guess you don't realize your luck that people aren't as judgemental about fandoms in your area / environment. But then you are still in uni, and it's still acceptable for a young adult to have "silly" hobbies.