[ SECRET POST #2197 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2197 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 048 secrets from Secret Submission Post #314.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

11. http://i.imgur.com/HJAC8.png

[dethtoll]

i realize this is probably a bad time to point this out but

well, take a look at that picture

when you see it...

[(Anonymous)]

lol, right?

[elephantinegrace]

I just spent an embarrassing amount of time staring at number 10.

[(Anonymous)]

It's a horse penis, you immature asshats. It probably means the horse has to pee. Because unlike dogs, where if you see its dick you better run the fuck away because that thing is turned on and coming for you, male horses can't pee unless they "hang out" or drop their penis out of their sheath. They also tend to "hang out" a little when they're really relaxed or someone is doing a really good job of grooming them. This particular horse's penis isn't erect. He's just "hanging out" a bit. In fact, that miniature horse is probably a gelding. Which means it has no balls. Which means it can't reproduce, and has no testosterone, and doesn't get erections. Grow the fuck up.

Also, fully extended horse penises are much longer than that. Here have some full horse dick (http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/file.php?40,file=33837,filename=1177348575-1237-horse_dick.jpg), since you're looking for it (sfw). That's a semi-erect stallion. He probably smells a mare somewhere near him. When he gets really excited, his penis will flare around the tip and get fully erect so it will probably smack itself on his stomach a few times. Also some stallions do that when they're bored, because unlike dogs they can't hump things to masturbate. And it's a pain in the ass because then the stallion charges everybody and shows off and makes a huge fuss and generally gets himself or others hurt.

I know this stuff because I've been riding for fifteen years and had to get over seeing horse dick pretty quick, and because my horse is a gelding and every so often you have to reach up into gelding sheaths to clean them out of all the dirt and dead skin (which peels and flakes off like a huge, half-centimeter thick sunburn), and also get rid of the bean, which is a dried ball of pee that gets trapped under the skin of some male horses and causes discomfort and urinary problems (kind of like a kidney stone I suppose). And then your hand (and arm, depending on how far up you had to reach) smells like nasty-ass musty horse dick for hours afterward, no matter how many times you wash it.

This has been your monthly dose of horse penis and sheath info, since you're clearly looking for it. I'm not OP, but I hope now that this is another way of turning people away from being juvenile idiots about horses.

[(Anonymous)]

First thing I noticed, tbh.

[(Anonymous)]

I thought OP was making some sort of statement about how dickish bronies can be.

[(Anonymous)]

Animals have genitals?

I thought this was referring to the wings..?

[(Anonymous)]

There's like, this vaguely rumply bit of fur on the horse's back that, after reading this and searching for something odd, kind of read like "shooped to look like an invisible/shitbrix thing" so I totally glossed the penis.

Also there's a scary face in the grass at the lower right corner.

[quothraven]

[(Anonymous)]

Thank you, OP

You've forever associated in my mind MLP with this pic and I will probably think of it for a while evey time I see a horse.

UM...

[(Anonymous)]

IS THAT A PENIS I SEE? :<<

Re: UM...

[chardmonster]

Yes

Boy horses have them

Re: UM...

[(Anonymous)]

So am I the only one who's seen an animal's penis up close? It was on a dog who'd just attacked my dog, not a horse or pony, but it's really not much to write home about, other than being quite long. Maybe that's why I missed it the first time and am not particularly giggly about it.

Re: UM...

[insanenoodlyguy]

Yes 9p, I’m afraid it is. This utterly 9ffensive picture 9f a 6icr9me equine, and let me check my priviledge here and ap9l9gize if this h9rse6east d9es n9t self identify as such, is 6latantly waving a69ut it’s cisgendered 69ne n99k in the m9st unsav9ry and 6razenly patriarchal display 9f 9ppressive phallus I have ever 6eheld. Shame, shaaaameeee.


#not including that one time with Horuss #What happens in Troll Vegas

HEY OP

[insanenoodlyguy]

FIXED IT FOR YOU

Re: HEY OP

[(Anonymous)]

WIN

[greenvelvetcake]

You're setting a poor example, OP.

[cakemage]

Really not seeing what everyone's so worked up about, here. Oh, noes! Male horses have visible penises! MY WORLDVIEW IS SHATTERED.

[(Anonymous)]

THIS REMINDS ME, I was in a group chat once and made an offhand comment about how I thought someone-or-other was "a one-trick pony" and everyone in the room thought I was talking about something from MLP.

This thread

[(Anonymous)]

is proof that not only bronies love to talk about horse dick.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm with you there buddy.

[(Anonymous)]

The greatly offended horsie set has not helped a damned thing with their graphic images. Thank you for lack of understanding of the humor here- the visions of anatomically correct MLP- and for reinforcing those unwanted images.

I'm sure that helped the OP quite bit.

[(Anonymous)]

So many scandalized Americans ITT

[(Anonymous)]

I don't know what's funnier: that there's apparently people who actually do that (I agree, they need to stop because wtf), or the people in this thread going OMGWTFBBQ because that pony has a penis, which is apparently SHOCKING.