[ SECRET POST #2253 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2253 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 077 secrets from Secret Submission Post #322.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

02. http://i.imgur.com/qV22P8K.png

[sugar_spun]

I can't wait to see the crazy fangirls that defend their looooooove.

[(Anonymous)]

Actually it seems like the ones who do ship it like it because it's depraved and Stockholm Syndrome-y and the furthest thing from ~true wuv~. Ramsay fangirls who wish they were in Theon's position OTOH are truly crazy.

[sugar_spun]

That's what the book fangirls do.

Wait until the show comes out and we have a hot guy doing the bad stuff.

[fae_boleyn]

I've avoided a lot of fandom - this is a thing? Oh God, the show is going to push it to Loki levels with even less justification, isn't it?

[(Anonymous)]

A lot of it's deliberate trolling and people having fun just because Ramsay is so OTT in his horribleness.

[(Anonymous)]

you're so above those ~dumb fangirls~

[(Anonymous)]

But not before hopping in the shower and washing their hair. They look like they just came out of a mosh pit.

[(Anonymous)]

Right? I have no idea who these guys are, but I don't think I'd want to see any sexual tension going on until after they washed that grease out of their hair.

[wauwy]

Alfie Allen, at least, is incredibly unattractive. I'm suspecting this will start being ignored because a bland white British guy being subjected to soul-breaking torture at the hands of another bland British guy is too yummy to resist.

[(Anonymous)]

who are they?

[sugar_spun]

The actors who play Ramsay Bolton and Theon Greyjoy.

[(Anonymous)]

I honestly am, idgaf. Theon is weird enough to be confused, Ramsay is just a sick fuck in the first place... not good, sure as hell not healthy... but I can dig the sexual implications (if not the shipping).

[(Anonymous)]

I didn't ship them until I heard Iwan Rheon was playing Ramsay. It's impossible for me to hate him now.

[(Anonymous)]

Ugh. You are exactly the type of person that is the problem.

[wauwy]

Well done being the type of fan we were all expecting and dreading, I guess.

[(Anonymous)]

You mean the kind of fan that HBO clearly wants to encourage given the actor they cast as Ramsay.

[(Anonymous)]

Ramsay burst into Theon’s chamber wearing his finely lobstered rape-armour. It was festooned with a dozen wooden phalluses expertly crafted by the dildographers of Myr.

“Reek, buddy. It’s time I gave that sweet little bum of yours a bloody good seeing to” He said while smirking smirkily.

“Y-You wot? m-mate” gasped Theon, receiving a mailed fist to the face in response.

Theon hit the ground like a sack of potatoes, if sacks of potatoes hit the ground in the same way people do, which they don’t really. Ramsay placed a foot on Theon’s back and ripped off his pantsu, exposing Theon’s naked nether regions. Forcibly, Ramsay spread Theon’s arse cheeks and exposes his hairy toot-chamber. He unzipped the front of his armour and a huge fuckshaft flopped out. “Here comes the Ramsay train!” he giggled. Of course the people of Westeros had no concept of the locomotive, but the word “train” was probably still used to refer to a group of wagons or carts or shit like that so get off my fucking back, ok. So anyway, Ramsay unleashed his massive throbbing member and pointed it squarely at Theon’s moist little kraken. He thrusted forward with the force of a charging knight and penetrated Theon’s arse again and again. Theon cried out in pain, and to his utter humiliation he felt his little dick getting stiff. How could he find arousal in such total degradation, he wondered? Ramsay’s rambling hands slid round the front of Theon’s chest, they slid down Theon’s body until they were poked by the erect little lord. Ramsay cried out, and swiftly disengaged his cock from it’s arse-scabbard. He drew his own sword and swung it wildly, nicking off Theon’s willy and sending it flying against the wall where it burst like an overripe tomato, if tomaotes were shaped like dicks. Tomatoes do sometimes grow in that shape though selective breeding makes the round ones far more common these days. oOf course in westoros they would only have a rudimentary understanding of this agricultural practice so tomoatoes shaped like the severed dick wouldn’t be unusal. Either way, it burst.

“Shit, my bad Reek, I thought a snake had gotten in here”.

Theon collapsed in a crumpled heap, his crotch was in some pretty fucking extreme pain but at least this was the end of Ramsay’s fun for the night.

“Welp” said Ramsay, flipping Theon over onto his back “You gotta deal with what ya got, let’s break in that new cunny of yours” his eye glinted mischieviously

Theon shrugged his shoulders and rolled his eyes. “Heeeeeeeeere we go again!” He thought

[(Anonymous)]

Greatest Thramsay fic ever. I remember when this was posted over at tumblr. Tru wuv.

[diet_poison]

wow they are...really not attractive to me

[(Anonymous)]

It's not a good pic of them.

[(Anonymous)]

Man this makes me want some fucking chimichaungas or whatever they're called, and I've never even had one before. But I'm craving that shit like it's a peppermint-covered dick, now.

Is that the secret of their powers? They make you want random food that you've never wanted before? Or that they make you think of male bartenders sitting on the edge of the counter, squirting lines of whipped cream between their legs? Mixing shots with banana vodka and perching them on their belt buckles, at the apex of the cream trail? Oh baby, you can take that paddle to my rear any old time.

[(Anonymous)]

Are peppermint-covered dicks known for being particularly tasty? They just sound gross and probably incredibly painful to me. NTTAWWT if that's your thing.

[darth_starkiller]

I've heard some fucked up stuff about Ramsay, so as much as I love Theon, I can't wait to see Iwan Rheon does with the character.

Would be nice to see some more of that creepiness he had going on at the beginning of Misfits.

[(Anonymous)]

LOL that is such an unflattering picture of them both! (and I say this as someone who finds IR attractive generally)