[ SECRET POST #2296 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2296 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 056 secrets from Secret Submission Post #328.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[nyxelestia]

From the looks of it, though, you are actually trying to fix your life situation. I got the impression from OP's secret that their friend isn't even trying, just whining about how much their life sucks but not really doing anything about it.

I have this problem with my mother in some respects. She does look for jobs and the fact that she can't find one, I don't begrudge her much (she is in a dying field for her area). But a lot of her other problems are pretty much her fault. She backs away from social events and then whines about being lonely. She used to spend extravagantly and was mindless about her money, and now is in dire financial straits, and even once she was in that financial rut, it took her far, FAR longer than necessary to start using certain resources for people like her. (Though even with the jobs thing, considering I told her this would happen so long ago, sometimes it is hard for me to sympathize with her even then - I told her long ago that if she chose her current path, she'd be "following her heart" but unlikely to get a job; the other path open to her would not be "following her heart" but would almost guarantee a job for her, because of the growth in the field. She didn't listen to me because I was 13, and instead listened to her old and almost senile mother, who lived on the other side of the planet and who got married as a young teen and who almost never worked a day in her life, and had no idea what the American job market was like.)

I love her and I'm not giving up on her, but I am starting to put distance between us because she has become WAY too dependent on me, and if I let this go on we'll both get dragged down by HER life choices. This isn't nearly the same situation as the OP, but I can definitely empathize and I can definitely see where they are coming from. Maybe the friend has depression, maybe not, but either way they need to take responsibility for the shit in their own lives, and if the first step is to do something about the depression then so be it.