[ SECRET POST #2303 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2303 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 048 secrets from Secret Submission Post #329.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: My little brother...

[(Anonymous)]

I'm reading over this passage and the thing that jumps out at me most is that there's one very critical perspective missing from all of this: What are your brother's feelings about any of this?

Eleven years is a bit young for any thorough or informed opinions on this sort of matter, but it's old enough to feel happy or unhappy with your life. Judging by your descriptions of his meltdowns and how often he has them, he's probably feeling at least as worn out as you are, if not considerably moreso.

Re: My little brother...

[(Anonymous)]

I've asked him before, often, and he always says the same thing: that he can't help it. And then he gets really inarticulate and visibly frustrated and storms off, usually to scream or cry.

When I asked what he'd like to do about it he said "I don't know!" and did the exact same thing I mentioned above.

Re: My little brother...

[(Anonymous)]

"What he'd like to do about it" is probably a bit too hard of a question for a kid his age, especially when he's under what seems to be a lot of stress and when none of the adults in his life have even a vague idea of how to answer that question.It does sound like he's pretty frustrated and unhappy, though.

One thing you/or and your parents can do with him, with or without any diagnosis, is help him to identify and recognize what sets him off ('too many people', 'too loud', 'asking too many things', 'not being allowed to flap hands', etc)- so long as you're having these discussions before or long after he loses his cool rather than in the heat of the moment. Being aware of what can trigger a meltdown is the first step toward being able to figure out coping skills and workarounds, and to eventually develop the tools for self-regulation.

Re: My little brother...

[(Anonymous)]

Except the kid doesn't need "workarounds" to prevent "triggering" tantrums. The kid needs to suck up the fact that behaviour is inappropriate for someone his age. That said, he might never realize that.

I have a coworker in their forties who still acts like this, and management either looking the other way and/or trying to bribe their own employee into not having these meltdowns, has only reinforced the bad behaviour....meanwhile, this person appears to have all the emotional maturity of a four-year-old.

Better your brother learn the lesson and take his lumps now, when he still is a child, instead of never learning the lesson, and forever remaining a child in an adult body.