fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2306 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2306 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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06. http://i.imgur.com/oVNCgcT.png
[kind of porny, illustrated, Hetalia]

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[Pokemon]

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[ ----- SPOILERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

09. [SPOILERS for Kingdom Hearts]

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10. [SPOILERS for Spartacus]
http://i.imgur.com/OtBhrXi.png
[gore? kind of, i think, live-action]

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11. [SPOILERS for Game of Thrones]

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[ ----- TRIGGERY SECRETS AHEAD ----- ]

12. [WARNING for rape]

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13. [WARNING for child abuse]

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14. [WARNING for loli/shota]

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #329.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

How do you react when people tell you racist or prejudiced type jokes?

I was recently sent a meme by a friend of mine where basically the point was "it's funny because this character is retarded." I replied with a simple "not my kind of humor" message.

I don't know. I really wish I had a good standard thing to say that communicates "that joke is not ok and no, it is not my fault for being insulted, it is your fault for being a jackass" that is simultaneously witty, not too obviously insulting or confrontational, and suggests that the conversation move right along.

Maybe I'll start trying something along the lines of "yes, I bet [person or group directly targeted by joke] finds that very funny" or something?

ayrt
I wanted to reply with a snarky "Why is this funny?" and have them actually try to explain "it's funny because he's retarded." and maybe realize how stupid and insulting it was. But I'm too much of a wimp to be so confrontational.

Actually, I'd never considered "why is that funny." I might use that, but the only problem is that it's gonna drag on a topic of conversation you never really wanted to get into in the first place...

I look at 'em and shake my head in a disappointed manner

If it's online, I'll just go "you shouldnt say that kind of thing and this is why"

Unfortunately if the joke is actually funny I'll laugh, feel terrible about it, and say "oh my god that's terrible"

"that is terrible, you're going to hell, please save me a seat on the bus because I'm going to hell too for laughing"

Depends on how well I know the person and how well I can predict their reaction. If I know you pretty well and you’re open to criticism I will tell you that I think it's _____ and why. If I don't know you well I may or may not depending on how threatening I find you and if I have backup. If I know you and know you aren't open to criticism I will cut you off and stop socializing with you.

The last one happened to my second cousin. Nice guy but he's a fucking racist and refuses to believe he's a racist because "it's true". When I pointed it out to him, thinking he might listen, his entire demeanor changed and I felt scared so I backed off and I haven't spoken to or seen him since.

So the lesson of the day? Know your audience/recipient. Sometimes you can help them realize there's a problem. Sometimes there's nothing you can do.

Well, I'm not good at thinking on my feet so I think I usually end up giving them a weird look and a few moments of awkward silence before ungracefully changing the subject.

I usually just say "is that really funny to you?" and see how they respond from there. if they didn't realize that it's offensive, it gives me the opportunity to explain what's wrong with it.

My first reaction is usually to laugh, and then think that maybe that wasn't OK. I never bother to say anything to the person telling the joke, though.

... "retarded"? Double standard, much? I don't know where you live, but to use 'retarded', especially in seriousness, is offensive, y'know.

ayrt Sorry. I work with special needs/mentally handicap kids and we use mentally retarded/retarded for diagnosis and discussion at work, I forget sometimes to change my language for broader public.

Ah, okay then.

I tend to laugh, but then I've always had a sleazy sense of humor, so.

If I find it funny, I laugh. If I don't find it funny, I don't laugh.

It completely depends on what kind of joke it is and in which context. If it is something that shouldn't be joked about I usually reply along the lines of Oh so what you are saying is that every female on the planet is like that? I didn't know that, do tell me more... or something along those lines.

It depends on what exactly is said, and just how offensive it is. Some of the stuff I've heard people say is so balls out there racist that I didn't bother to soften it beyond 'You know, that's pretty racist?'

But if it isn't balls out there levels...I usually just don't act like it's funny, and drop the topic.

My friend told me a joke like that a while ago. It was actually kind of funny - two couples get together every so often and exchange sex ideas, and have a great time. Eventually, they come up with the idea to switch partners for a night, and since everyone agrees, that's just what they do, and head off up to their respective rooms. A few hours later, one of the husbands says, "Wow, that was great. I didn't know it would be that good." The other husband says, "I know, right? We should go see how the girls are doing."

And it's not really offensive or anything, but the punchline is basically that they're bi, and if you take out the assumption that everyone is straight, the joke doesn't really work. I think I just ended up staring at my friend until he dropped the subject (he knows I'm a lesbian).

You know, I almost feel like that joke could work if it was played off of the assumption of the listener, as in 'now you have just realized how narrow your view of the world is', but if that was the case there would have to be a better set up for that. Too bad it doesn't.

I've heard some people saying they've had success at derailing that kind of stuff by acting supremely oblivious and forcing the would-be comedian to explain the joke... but I've never tried it myself.

Depends on the joke, but mostly I would just look at it awkwardly and hit the back button.

If it's in person, they get the facial expression that Donna is making in my icon. If it's online, they get, "..." or possibly "O...kay then, moving on."

I go, "Ugh, dis bitch", roll my eyes and I get the fuck out of the situation. I'd rather not get too entrenched into something I wholeheartedly despise.

[ SECRET POST #2306 ]

how do you respond to insulting "jokes"?

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Re: how do you respond to insulting "jokes"?

Re: how do you respond to insulting "jokes"?

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