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Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2013-05-25 04:12 pm
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[ FS Anon Meme ]

F!S Anon Meme (the ??th)


Secrets, rants, opinions, anything you want to say about your fandom or a fandom or fandom in general, do it here! Anonymously, of course. Get it all off your chest.

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1. Going anon is encouraged but not absolutely required (for those who struggle with recaptchas and stuff).
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3. No dropping personal info or IRL contact info, etc.

That's about it, though!

(Today's post is below.)
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(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 10:02 pm (UTC)(link)
My partner and I plan on getting married once we scrounge up enough money for the marriage license, but I've been calling him my boyfriend at work, and neither of us like the word "husband," and the thought of telling people I'm married/I have a husband feels really mature and awkward, but not many people actually understand that when I say "partner," I'm talking in an intimate sense (which is really the only reason I started calling him my boyfriend in the first place). ARGH.

Mostly just bitching because this wouldn't even be an issue if, a) we had non-ambiguous non-gendered words for intimate partners, and b) labels implying marriage weren't taken more seriously than those that only imply an intimate relationship. Fuck you, English.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 10:06 pm (UTC)(link)
why don't you just use his name

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 10:53 pm (UTC)(link)
He doesn't really have one right now.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 11:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh. He's trans?

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 10:06 pm (UTC)(link)
the thought of telling people I'm married/I have a husband feels really mature and awkward

If you can't say it maybe you're not ready to do it. /snark

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 11:05 pm (UTC)(link)
Considering we've been living together for several years, have been through a lot of shit together, and probably communicate more openly and honestly with each other than a lot of married couples? It's not the act of marriage/being married that feels mature and awkward (because we've basically been doing that), it's the ingrained social implications of using words associated with it.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 11:11 pm (UTC)(link)
What ingrained social implications

I feel like you're being a bit Peter Pan about this whole thing, just say husband, it won't kill you

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 11:27 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah that's bullshit. Grow the fuck up and call it what it is, husband.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-26 02:13 pm (UTC)(link)
rme

Call him your Sun and Stars and/or Moon of Your Life if you insist on snowflakedom.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 11:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Spousecreature? That's what Tamora Pierce calls hers.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 11:11 pm (UTC)(link)
...and having just written that, I realize that "spouse" is the word you're probably looking for.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 11:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Life-mate.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 11:30 pm (UTC)(link)
"This is the man who will get half my retirement if we divorce."

:)

Spouse.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-25 11:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Spouse. The word you are looking for is spouse. Rhymes with house.

Re: Spouse.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-26 12:52 am (UTC)(link)
+1

(Anonymous) 2013-05-26 12:56 am (UTC)(link)
Partner.

It works.

(Anonymous) 2013-05-26 01:51 am (UTC)(link)
The other half?

(Anonymous) 2013-05-26 03:01 am (UTC)(link)
I just mentioned this to my mother to get her opinion, and she said my dad didn't like being called "husband" when they were first married because to him, a husband was someone that got cheated on.

Which probably says more than I wanted to know about my father's love life before he settled down with my Mom.
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