[ SECRET POST #2394 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2394 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 038 secrets from Secret Submission Post #342.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Yes, I don't believe it's the poor kitty who's a heterocentric, misogynistic weirdo convinced that sucking cock is so degrading that only the "lesser" man in a male/male pairing will do it.

The number of people here agreeing with the OP makes me want to scream.

[kallanda_lee]

How on earth did you get to the "degrading" assumption. Nothing was mentioned of it, and while it COULD be an explanation, there are dozens of other reasons OP could have that preference.

Slash, like other fandom smut is a fantasy, and most who participate in it know it's not a reflection of real gay relationships.

I also tend to have preferences about who's topping/bottoming. And guess what? My preference is generally that the half of the couple that I'm crushing on (more) is bottoming because apparently my brain finds men who take it up the ass hot. And degradation has very little to do with it, unless it's actually one of those kinky fics.

[(Anonymous)]

I feel the same, I like my favorites to do the bottoming but I really don't like humiliation at all.

[(Anonymous)]

I love humiliation porn but I don't find getting fucked humiliating. Write me some hair pulling and forced nudity and some dirty, shaming talk instead/as well, please!

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT: Because it's a huge trope in tons of m/m slash that the "weaker" more "feminine" partner is always the one penetrated (and for the OP this seems to include oral sex) because being penetrated would mean the other partner was less than perfectly masculine.

It comes from ugly cultural stuff--it's no coincidence that "cocksucker" is an insult in English--but I'm sick of it in slash. It's misogynistic and homophobic and heterocentrist, and I don't think the argument "it's not a reflection of real gay relationships" is valid when the problem is reproducing prejudice.

I want to read about men who are happy sucking cock, thanks.

[kallanda_lee]

But maybe OP does too..you don't know that. Hell, you don't even know OP is straight.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm not assuming the OP is straight. I said the trope was heterocentric, not that the OP was therefore necessarily straight. It's not like being queer makes people immune to ideologies of sexuality and gender.

[(Anonymous)]

I'd argue that manga/anime is a significantly worse offender than slash as far as enforcing traditional gender roles goes, and giving oral (whether to a vagina or a penis) is considered a dominant act there, for the most part. Heck, from what little Japanese live action porn I've seen, it even carries over to that.

Oral can absolutely be both. The problem isn't having a strong preference for which characters enjoy oral, it's associating it exclusively with a particular power dynamic, no matter which one that is.

[(Anonymous)]

I always thought it was completely ridiculous that "cocksucker" is used as an insult. I never use it that way. I like sucking cocks! it's fun! and I never heard of a guy, gay, straight or bi, who didn't like getting his cock sucked!

I think I just channeled John Waters.

[thene]

Uh wtf.

It's funny because I feel like one of the more overplayed slash scenes is the one where one character gets sucked off and then fucked, ie, it's tops who wind up doing more sucking.

my $.02 is that I find oral way more fun to write, or read, than anal, so I pretty much don't bother with anal any more. This secret has made me think about pairings where I've only written about one character giving oral - never really thought too hard about the whys and wherefores of that. Thanks, OP.

[(Anonymous)]

Except OP didn't say any of that. They just implied they can't enjoy it, for reasons unknown.

[(Anonymous)]

Which obviously has nothing to do with the imposition of gendered, misogynistic, homophobic sexual roles (why does the OP assume that only one man's cock can/should get sucked??). Nothing to do with the idea that cocksucking, like getting penetrated, is a weak thing to do, and since in a m/m pairing one man has to be "the woman" (of course!), obviously only one man will suck cock.

Can we please not pretend that a bunch of hugely culturally-freighted stuff about sex acts and gender and power isn't there just because the OP didn't spell it out?

[(Anonymous)]

What irks me about the way you write this is that you skip a step. There's the incredibly irksome "feminine* guys automatically bottom" (this is real and a problem) and bottoms always deliver oral (this is not in any way reliably true in slashfic, but the association of such a basic sex act with dominance or submission can indeed problematic if it's attached to an author or a group of people rather than, say, a character's personal opinions in one story - some real people have this association, so placing it is only problematic if it is done consistently and always in the same direction).

* Whatever the fuck that even means - I know it when I see it, but the criteria are such a bunch of bullshit that it's hard not to start twitching.