fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2424 ]

[ SECRET POST #2424 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2423 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

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I'm American-born but my parents are immigrants. I grew up digesting a lot of media that had this concept of parents punishing a child by "grounding" them, but I never saw it in real life. In my house if you did something bad intentionally, you got a "do it again and I will beat your ass so hard you won't sit down for a week" (all threats, no follow-through...well, a swat on the behind if you got caught in the act), or if you made my parents mad, they were actually mad at you. Which felt just as shitty as someone being mad at you as an adult. Also my sister and I were pretty well-behaved, so the issue didn't come up much.

Anyhoo, I was in a very small social circle when I was a little kid, and when I really started thinking about this "grounding" business I was already homeschooled. When I got to college it wasn't the place to ask around, because I live in a very mixed city and pretty much everyone there grew up with non-American parents and different disciplinary traditions.

So: did your parents ever use grounding as a punishment? What did it mean? What privileges were revoked or extra chores made to do or whatnot? I'd like to know if the practice really is all that common or if I've been buying into a lie for years.

I was never grounded as such, my parents mostly just got mad at me.

Occasionally privileges would get revoked, mostly in terms of not having access to entertainment and that kind of thing, but it was never called being grounded. Wasn't the word my parents would use and it didn't happen often. I don't know. It's kind of tricky to tell what grounding is, I guess?

I was never grounded. Mostly because I was such a boring kid I never got in trouble. But the few times I did get in trouble, I'd usually get something taken away. Like not going to my friend's house.

My parents tried to ground us, but I can't recall a time where they ever followed through.

My parents grounded us whenever we did something we weren't supposed to, and so did most of my friends' parents. It meant no going out of the house for fun, no watching TV except the news, no computer or internet (this was in the early 90s and everything for school was handwritten, most homes didn't even have internet), doing extra chores around the house like cleaning the dishes every night instead of just some, and stuff like that.

I had a friend whose parents also wouldn't let the kids listen to the radio when they were grounded but my parents thought it was harmful to take music from someone and wasn't a good punishment.

My parents also would use corporal punishment under extreme circumstances when we were teens, like when my brother stole my mom's car. But mostly we just got grounded if we did something wrong.

I was never grounded, but I'm not American. I think my mother mostly worked with threats and rewards, and I rarely got long-term punished, I just heard a lot of screaming if I was acting as a shit.

I don't think grounding was a huge punishment for me seeing as I didn't leave the house anyway.

The worst was when they took TV and internet so I had nothing to do

They tried - because I literally started turning around and sticking my ass out while saying 'Go ahead and spank me' when I knew I was in trouble when I was 5.

It [grounding] didn't work since all the stuff they could take away [Tv, video games, playing with friends, etc] didn't really effect me and they couldn't take away the one thing that would [books] since I'd already had quite the collection at the time and I was very good at hiding the ones I was reading/wanted to read soon. I was a hard kid to punish, but I was also a pretty good kid so. -shrugs-

tl;dr: It was common in my circle and family - but it didn't work too well on me. However, everything else worked even less well.

My parents never even attempted to do so, because it's not like I visited friend's homes or called them on the phone. There wasn't much to take away.

I remember my mother taking my gameboy advance away...and I just took out my gameboy color.

I got grounded...maybe once? Like you, normally I got threats of beating my ass (not followed through, might get a swat)...but at least once i think I was grounded. For a month i couldn't go on the computer and wasn't allowed to hang with friends outside of school, no after school events, no weekend hang outs and had to go straight to my (boring) room after school.

I hated it, but it was p. deserved actually (I was being a racist shit, granted didn't realise at the time but yeah. Horrified at kid!me)

/australian, mixed household too..my bro's get grounded more than I did

Most punishments were computer taken away or doing extra household chores

Grounding was the primary form of punishment I got as a child, usually after getting yelled at.

Sometimes I was just sent to my room for the rest of the day, other times for a week and so on. Nothing ever got taken away from me (I had a TV and stuff in my room), I had my books so I didn't really care that much. I still got to go to handball practice and my parents never got home before 4 so even if I was grounded I only had to get home before my step mother for dinner.

The only thing I was punished for was getting home late, either for dinner at 4 or for bedtime, they wouldn't ground me for breaking something or not doing my homework. If I didn't do my homework I just had to sit by the table until it was done (to clarify I did my homework after dinner, I didn't get to go outside to play before it was finished), same with chores I had to do them before getting to go out, which I never saw as punishment and it was the same for my friends and as long as I did it they didn't care how long it took.

When I got older I was punished by losing pre set amounts of money from my allowance, also they cut the internet to make us finish chores and stuff. This was at my foster parents house though, so I imagine if I lived at my fathers house still I would just be confined to the house, which didn't really scare me at my foster parents house as we lived 30 minutes by car away from the city, so grounding me would just be counterproductive.

No, because I didn't really go anywhere or have friends so "grounded" didn't really mean anything.

But I've seen people use "grounded" not as "you can't go out" but any time of take-away punishment. Like, "grounded from using the phone" - can't use the phone for X amount of time. "Grounded from the TV" etc etc

I think the main reason I was never "grounded" is because I never wanted to go anywhere; like I had friends, but going over to their houses was really low on my list of priorities.

I got stuff taken away a lot as punishment. Books, computer privileges, TV privileges. Which was not a big hardship because I came home before my parents and had like at least two, three hours on my own at home so...how were they actually going to monitor that?

Oh! And one time my mother smacked me on the mouth for being snarky about something and my nose bled, and she freaked out so much I got a promise that neither she nor my father would ever hit me again.

I'm from the UK. I never got in trouble, really, and grounding wouldn't have been much of a punishment for me. I don't remember hearing much about it from my friends either. It never seemed like a real thing to me, though I did find out years later that my much older brother spent a lot of time grounded when he was a teenager (most of a whole year, once) - but that was mostly my mum attempting to keep him away from his friends at the time who were horrible influences. He just had to stay at home outside of school and only certain friends were allowed round. He's pretty grateful for it now.

I never got it, possibly because I was an introvert even as a little kid and tended to spend most of my free time happily at home by myself anyway. If I acted up, I got a smack on the butt, or if I was really bad, a few smacks on the butt with a wooden spoon. Which apparently is now considered child abuse, but it didn't hurt bad enough to actually discourage me from doing anything I wanted to do, so I don't think of it that way. ;) Sometimes I was told to go to my room... so I would go to my room and play with my stuffed animals and draw and read and be quite content. I must have been a terrible kid to have to think up punishment for.

when I was a small child they once took away my crayons and colored pencils after I had drawn on the walls and tables

I didn't really misbehave often, so having my parents upset with me was punishment enough D:

My parent's mode of punishment was to ground me. It came with varying degrees of severity, but most of the time it meant sitting on my bed doing nothing (well, I was supposed to be thinking about what I did wrong) for the day. I wasn't allowed to watch TV, read, play with my toys, etc. I was allowed to come out for meals and to use the bathroom, but that was it. If I did something really bad then I might be grounded for a few days or my mom would take away my bike (whichever toy was my favorite at the time) for a period of time.

My parents only really grounded me when I was little (before teenage years). I was a pretty well-behaved kid so I didn't get in trouble that often. I was too afraid of my mom to really step out of line. She's a great mom, but she really knew how to make my brother and I behave. Neither of my parents ever hit me or my brother nor did they threaten to. My mom just has this presence that let you know not to mess with her.

If I did something really bad I would get video game, telephone or internet privileges taken away, stopping me from going out never worked because I didn't go out. I was well-behaved generally(bar occasional bouts of brattiness but my parents just rolled their eyes and ignored me whenever I got like that) so these weren't common occurrences and most of the time if I did something wrong my parents would be angry with me rather than 'ground' me in any sense.

I think "being grounded" meant more back when kids spent the majority of their free time running around outside with friends or at least having a friend over. If you didn't have TV (or there was very little on TV) or video games or a computer - or even a lot of books - having to stay home and not have anyone over was a real punishment. Telling a kid today "You can't leave the house!" would just be met with a shrug.

When I was a kid, grounding usually meant no friends over or going to see a friend, no TV, and - later - no computer.

I never got grounded - but then again I don't recall ever doing anything so severe as to warrant such a punishment.

I did get spanked when I was little, maybe two or three times at that, though, and not past the age of five I think.

To me the worse thing when I misbehaved was having my dad quietly give me that, "I am really really really disappointed in you..." look. That look made me feel like the smallest person in the world, and I instantly regretted whatever it was that I'd done.

I was more worried about getting That Look than I was about my mum yelling at me. XD Mum yelled but then it was over, dad could be quietly disappointed in your actions for a while.

I was never grounded for almost the same reason you were (my brother, sister and I were fairly well behaved children) but I know a lot of my friends who would be grounded in various forms. I remember once they grounded my brother by taking out his TV and Playstation and he had to do his homework right when he came home.

It really depended on the family though. Most of the time grounding means being sent to your room and no play dates. It was pretty common when I was growing up (in the 90s)

Once in grade.. 9? I think? I skipped school and went downtown that day and I guess that was terrible because I was in a catholic school. /shrug

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