[ SECRET POST #2431 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2431 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 015 secrets from Secret Submission Post #347.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 2 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 2 - sjw trolls ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

I don't get this. Is it really such a big deal to go see a movie you're not all that interested in? My friends and I usually take turns picking movies so we all end up going to see stuff we're not crazy about, but we do it because it's more fun to go to a movie with friends than it is to go alone. Same with restaurants.

Friendships mean compromise. Sometimes you do something they want, and sometimes they do something you want. It's an hour or two of your time, it's not like they're asking you to spend an entire weekend doing something.

[blueonblue]

Is it really such a big deal to go see a movie you're not all that interested in? My friends and I usually take turns picking movies so we all end up going to see stuff we're not crazy about, but we do it because it's more fun to go to a movie with friends than it is to go alone. Same with restaurants.

Friendships mean compromise. Sometimes you do something they want, and sometimes they do something you want.

That's pretty much what I was trying to say, but I am much too tired to make sense.

ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah, I just don't understand why it's such a horrible ordeal to watch a movie because your friends want to see it. If my friends and I worked that way, we would never see movies together or eat out at all because no one would ever be able to agree on one movie or restaurant. This way, everyone gets their turn getting what they want.

Re: ayrt

[comma_chameleon]

To me there's a difference between compromise and always being on the 'losing' end. Compromise means finding something to watch or do that you're all relatively going to enjoy, even if it's not something you'd normally watch/do.

Say I want to see an action film and my friend wants to see the latest rom-com, compromise to me would mean picking a third film that both of us would enjoy parts of (such as a romantic action adventure or something). We may not enjoy all elements of the film we chose, but we're not shelling out money for something that makes us want to wedge our head between the seats or drown ourselves in our pop.

Also, if I don't normally socialize with my co-workers outside of work, why should I be out so much money for an outing I didn't want in the first place, when whether or not I see a movie with a co-worker shouldn't affect our working relationship.

Re: ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

Say I want to see an action film and my friend wants to see the latest rom-com, compromise to me would mean picking a third film that both of us would enjoy parts of (such as a romantic action adventure or something).

but why choose something that you're both only going to partially enjoy instead of taking turns doing something that you each enjoy? that's not always being on the losing end, that means both people get the chance to be on the winning end. seems to be that's a lot better than both of you being only sort of happy.

Re: ayrt

[comma_chameleon]

I guess I just can't see dragging someone to a movie you know they're not going to enjoy at all, and then expecting them to pay for it on top of that.

Both of us being sort of happy, or content seems like a better compromise to me than one person being happy and the other wondering how long they can spend in the bathroom before someone gets suspicious, because if they spend five more minutes watching a film they loathe they might commit friendicide.

Re: ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

wow, you are ridiculously overdramatic. it's just a movie. it's not going to kill you to watch it even if you think it's dumb.

no wonder so many people these days are completely socially inept, they're spoiled children who expect everyone else to cater to them.

Re: ayrt

[comma_chameleon]

*snort* It's overly dramatic for me to decide that I don't want to spend money on something I think is dumb and won't enjoy? And yet compromising to see a movie that both (or a group) might enjoy is stupid to you?

Sorry, but I'm not shelling out my limited 'entertainment' funds in order to spend two hours sitting uncomfortably (most likely in pain) and not even remotely enjoy the film I'm spending money on.

I have no problem with compromise, but it's not social ineptitude or being spoiled to expect that everyone who goes out as a group enjoys themselves just a little bit.

I bet if your friend was a vegan or vegetarian you'd insist on going to a steakhouse and tell them that they're being whiny and spoiled by expecting a compromise so that they also can find something more than a garden salad to eat for dinner.

Re: ayrt

[(Anonymous)]

Comma's idea makes more sense that you, you sound dramatic for deciding people are somehow spoiled for compromising on finding something both parties will enjoy

you need to grow up anon, you sound an awful lot like one of those socially, inept, spoiled people who want to be catered to

[(Anonymous)]

Where is everyone getting this idea that the only kind of compromise is finding something that both people are sort of okay with? Saying "we'll see your movie this week and mine next week" IS compromise. It just isn't instant gratification compromise, which is what everyone here seems to expect.

[comma_chameleon]

But the issue behind that is now I'm (hypothetically speaking of course) spending twice the amount of money as before and one of us is going to be miserable on each of those outings. What's enjoyable about that?

[(Anonymous)]

Or they could go see a movie both would enjoy, or do something else they would both enjoy. If I wanted to see Movie A and one of my friends was not interested in seeing Movie A, I would either choose Movie B (or C or D)or another activity altogether and see Movie A at a different time. Compromise can be done differently.

[bored_bitch]

Going to the theaters isn't the cheapest thing in the world, and you can find something the both of you might enjoy.

Although I have absolutely no problems about going to the movies by myself.
It's dark, and I'm going to pay attention to what's in front of me, not someone else.
So I don't particularly understand this.

You sit down and have conversations when you go out to eat.
You're not supposed to without pissing everyone else off at the movies.

And OP's friends shouldn't have been persistent when they said "no."
That's the biggest issue, here.

[(Anonymous)]

How is it "more fun" with friends? You're sitting there in the dark, paying attention to the film, not gossiping and squealing over the actors.

...And if you ARE gossiping and squealing, on behalf of everyone else who would actually like to HEAR the film, hush up for pity's sake! It's not THAT exciting to see Loki or whoever.

[hiyami]

Yeah, this. I never understood in what going to movies is better with people, especially if the movie is one you're not interested in. If I want to spend time with my friends, we pick an activity that gives room and time to talk, like visiting some place, or ending up in a cafe / Starbucks equivalent.

In France you can get cards that give you illimited access to a chain of movie theaters for a monthly fee, and it's interesting if you go to movies at least 3/4 times a month. So in that case yeah, it doesn't matter much if the movie isn't that much your cup of tea.

But it's not for me. There aren't that many movies I really want to see. Each time I saw 3 movies over 2 months, I ended up thinking that they were not that good to make it worth the cost + 2hrs at the theater + the time lost to get there.

[(Anonymous)]

Because you can talk about it afterwards. I went to see Star Trek Into Darkness with four friends and we were standing outside for almost one hour afterwards and talked about the movie.

[(Anonymous)]

There's nothing wrong with talking during a movie, at least in certain circumstances and with certain movies. Not coincidentally, those are the only times and circumstances where watching a movie is more fun with friends. Mostly, these are movies that are rather bad, or old and familiar, or theaters that are somewhat empty. For instance, I saw STID in a theater that had about 5 other people in it, and I don't really feel that bad about sitting in the back and whispering to my friend about it.

And then there's also the case that some movies are good to see with other people because moviegoing can be a communal experience even when you're not talking. When I saw Pacific Rim, it was much more enjoyable because the theater was totally full, because it gave a kind of energy and excitement to the thing.

IMO anyway.

[otakugal15]

My friends and I end up whispering at random points or making random comments and it makes the viewing, imo, a lot more fun. then we have like, an hour or so afterwards to either criticize, applaud, squee, what have you. Together.

[(Anonymous)]

I only go to a movie say once or twice a year, so you can be sure my friends and I make sure it's something we ALL want to see. Otherwise what's the point?

For everything else, there's drunken pizza movie nights where if you're bored it's okay to pass out.

dunno where you got this compromise idea from. Maybe willing compromises, but it makes no sense to make friendship and even give and take of /resentment/. Much better for friendship to be based over shared interests rather than dragging each other to things we don't like. if one friend doesn't like something, go with a friend who does!