[ SECRET POST #2441 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2441 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 055 secrets from Secret Submission Post #349.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[forgottenjester]

Eh, the picture is something I could let slide but if it made you uncomfortable it made you uncomfortable. However, his reaction to you sounds completely inappropriate.

If I were you I would print screen the entire PM conversation and post it on your wall so everyone can see how much of an asshole he is. Maybe even link your mom to it. Then again I'm kinda an asshole so you may not want to take that advice.

Now, let me get serious and say something that you may not want to hear. Sometimes siblings never get along. They say it takes two to tango and that goes for all kinds of relationships. You want to have a good relationship with him? Well, he has to want to have a good relationship with you too. It can't all be one-sided. Trust me, I know from experience. My brother is sexist too. He told me that all women want to have babies as their main goal in life and that I was fucked up in the head for either not wanting kids or wanting to adopt. He also has the funny habit of only talking to you if he wants something. He lacks empathy and makes everything about himself. I learned the hard way that we could never be friends. Because I tried. Oh did I try for years. But it was in vain because I was the only one trying. He will always be my brother and I will always be there for him but we aren't friends and we never will be. And you know? That's okay. It's actually okay. It was a sad reality at first but after a while I saw how freeing it was and how much happier my life had become once I had realized this.

Do I think your brother is as far gone as mine? Probably not. Maybe he does want to have a good relationship with you and he's just a big man-baby idiot who needs to grow up. I don't know. You need to judge it all for yourself. You need to figure out what's best for you and healthy for you. What are the lines you draw? What are the things that are unbearable? Is having a "good" relationship with your brother worth any of the negative stuff? This is all about not what you want but what you need. What do you need in a relationship and can he provide it? (He should ask himself these same questions.)

As for me? What do I do? I treat my brother well and I remain respectful to him as a family member but I do not get emotionally invested in him. We don't see each other too often so it all works out well.

So you need to think about those things I asked you. What is his relationship worth? And what are things you can't accept? And most importantly, is he willing to work for it too?

[diet_poison]

haaaaaaaaaa yeah your brother sounds way worse than mine, ngl (at least on the sexism front, I mean damn)

I'm waiting to see if he's ever really interested in a real relationship. The problem is every now and then he'll start to be really nice and I'll think hey we're going to get along, yay and if I snubbed him during those times I'd feel like an asshole, and probably be called one by him a dozen different ways. =/

[forgottenjester]

I figured. But what I said still stands, regardless of severity. It's all about your comfort zone.

...That sounds like a cycle. You have to figure out if things improve in these cycles and if they don't if you're okay with that.

But what I really feel I should emphasize is that your emotional wellbeing comes first.