[ SECRET POST #2450 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2450 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 031 secrets from Secret Submission Post #350.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: I feel bullied in my home

[(Anonymous)]

ayrt

Nooo, I'm sorry, that response was more directed at OP than you, didn't mean to come across snappy at all. It's just, besides the fact that OP, with almost 99.9% certainty doesn't need hospitalization, in my professional experience, hospitalization is rarely a great option, it's just sometimes the necessary option. It's a last resort to keep everyone safe, but it rarely helps them move forward and learn how to live in the real world, which it sounds like OP needs - to learn how to live in the real world.

Re: I feel bullied in my home

[saku]

it's ok, i understand where you're coming from. i've seen a lot of people try to shirk responsibility in this way and it just seems really pointless to me because inpatient facilities - facility depending obviously - are no walk in the park, and when you get out you're still gonna be faced with the things that were plaguing you before, so unless you go there to find a way to cope then your time spent there isn't going to be all that helpful in the long run.

but yeah it def depends on the facility too. mine was focused on "rehabilitation" but it sucked ass at it. other wards don't really go that in-depth and cover what you mentioned, and maybe that's what op was looking for but ... idk i can't really comment on that, i'm guessing you have more experience there. it doesn't sound like those kind of facilities would be much help to op either though. guess it just depends what they're looking for.

Re: I feel bullied in my home

[(Anonymous)]

I hope you got the help that you needed. :( Must have been a tough process no matter what.

Re: I feel bullied in my home

[saku]

yeah it definitely sucked, that's for sure. i feel like the experience educated me but not in a particularly valuable way. in the end i think the most it did was leave a bad imprint on my history, but i feel like i've recovered from it for the most part. sometimes admitting people against their will is necessary/helpful, but that wasn't the case for me. it happens, i guess.

OP

[(Anonymous)]

99.9% sure huh?

I was hitting myself to "punish myself" for bad thoughts was I was 9.

I was making myself sick for thinking bad things when oh about 15, not because I wanted to mind. I would dread and fear it, but I felt compelled to out of guilt.

I was diagnosed with severe OCD when I was 11 and then again at 17. It comes and goes throughout life but often seems to flare up when I move somewhere. I've JUST moved and have some serious anxiety. I'm breaking down crying for no reason and have suicidal urges when I get turned down for a job.

I have never even taken drivers ed and was pretty much told when I was 18 that I never would be able to drive and had to rely on my parents if I wanted to get somewhere.

I feel like I'm trapped in a prison. and I feel like I'm going to be trapped in this prison forever unless I get a job. and the prospect of getting a job doesn't look good. I want to separate myself from my family because I'm afraid of hurting them. I'm afraid of hurting me.

I just want them to live a happy life they deserve.

Without me.