case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2013-09-28 03:11 pm

[ SECRET POST #2461 ]


⌈ Secret Post #2461 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 070 secrets from Secret Submission Post #352.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

(Anonymous) 2013-09-28 09:24 pm (UTC)(link)
LA anon I agree with you about the concept not being weird. (I have some family members in the film and TV industry and have met a few well known actors, and known a couple socially.) In fact I think it just makes you realise quite how much it's just a job like any other and that includes all the fan service. One thing that's really struck me is how actors are still giving a performance on talk shows, or conventions/fan signings etc. Which of course makes sense, but it's more underlined when you know them IRL and they aren't the same person who is on the chat show.

However I have had the weirdness that the OP talks about a few times, it can feel really uncomfortable when people start talking about an actor you know, and being fannish about them, swooning over them etc. I tend to try and avoid those conversations, and avoid dropping names, but sometimes you feel you have to own up to knowing someone, that can be very awkward. (Just if you get drawn into the conversation about them) Also I never comment in fan circles, even anon sites about people I know, that would feel too strange. And never in a million years would read RPF about them, or smut fics about their characters.

(Anonymous) 2013-09-28 09:53 pm (UTC)(link)
OP

I think the weirdness for me came when that disconnect between Jesse Eisenberg as an actor and Jesse Eisenberg as a person got inextricably tangled. It's the difference between his social role as an actor (and therefore someone in a professional capacity, and allowing some distance from myself as a person) and his social role as someone's kid, who is easy to approach and relate to (all social roles that I recognize and inhabit myself).

It really doesn't help that his dad is a super nice guy who's fairly paternal with his students, as most of them are the age of his kids, anyway.

But anyway, especially with a job as an actor, it feels kind of voyeuristic, cause I know shit about him that I wouldn't otherwise if his dad weren't my professor. And by merit of his job, he's going to be showing more of himself, physically and emotionally, than other jobs do or would.

Like, I don't get to witness the children of people I know
crying/banging/freaking out/whatever in my normal life, because that's kind of awkward and intimate, and not in my field as an acquaintance of their parent, even if I am that kid's peer. (And while I realize that acting =/= real life, it's still a side of that person that I have witnessed.)

So yeah... idk, I think a lot of this is just my personal issues. :/

(Anonymous) 2013-09-28 10:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Another LA anon. I started dating someone with a lot of TV connections a few years ago and a friend of his is an actor from a show I am fannish about. I STILL cannot speak in his presence and I first met him four years ago. It's horrible. And he's a really nice guy. I just worry about being an idiot. And yes, I realize that not speaking makes me an idiot. I have social anxiety at the best of times and it's 100 times worse around him.

A couple of our friends who are actors are having some success, which means I'm running into more actors from shows I'm fannish about at parties. This sounds awesome in theory but I'm totally socially awkward so it means I don't go to parties anymore.

(Anonymous) 2013-09-29 02:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Anon I don't think you are an idiot, but not speaking in social situations just makes them awkward more than anything. I'm the anon above who does know a few actors. Thing is, I never feel fannish about actors. They are just people, often a bit dull and self obsessed people in fact, who are doing a job. I might be fannish about the characters they play, and the shows. In fact I don't even understand the obsession around actors. Like I said I did make a decision not to participate in fandom about people I know, I do think that being too involved in it would be too strange and feel like I was being false with them. I know people who know actors from the fandom I am in, and I've also decided that if I do ever meet these actors socially (which is possible but not hugely likely) I will leave my fandom. You might find it helps if you withdraw a bit from fandoms of actors you know, and concentrate on ones where you know no one, if that's possible at all.

Anyhow what I'm trying to say, is if you are going to mix more and more with actors from shows you like, your life will be changed for the better if you start to separate them from the character/show. Just see them the same way you would a friend of your partner's who is a teacher. I never talk to actors about their shows. Beyond being polite and saying thought they were great or whatever, but hardly at all. They don't want to talk about work all the time, just like we don't. I have a couple of friends and a relative, who've done work I've never seen. Not deliberately, just missed their stuff on release and didn't ever catch it up.

I hope you can overcome your shyness around these actors because your life is being negatively affected at the moment and the more you just talk about normal stuff in those situations the more you'll realise that they are just normal people, some nice and fun to be around, and some not, just like the rest of us.